Rebellious Posted December 9, 2008 Share Posted December 9, 2008 So, I feel the traditional "pull back" stage coming with the new guy, and even though I don't think it's in a bad way -- I feel sure he likes me still, actually a lot (based on recent actions, plans, and things I've heard from mutual friends) -- and he's not being inconsiderate, it bothers me. Why do men do this? Every guy I've ever dated, including many that got past the "pull back" stage (almost all the ones where I didn't lose interest or act nutty during the "pull back" stage got over this...I'm not talking about "the fade" where the guy falls off the planet, but just where he seems to be "pondering" a bit), has done this, so it's got to be something in the way many guys are wired, at least. But I have never understood it. I used to act crazy during the "pull back" stage when I was younger and insecure. Now, I don't do that. But I often lose interest, because I tend to be interested in what's in front of me and absence does not make my heart grow fonder. (Not that I would ever be disloyal, but emotional distance especially doesn't intrigue me; it just bores me.) Still, I cannot begin to understand why it's productive for men in a relationship sense. It seems to be productive in some way, because a majority of the men who have subjected me to it have come back afterwards, stronger than ever, and seemed to have gotten something "out of it" so to speak. Any thoughts on why men do this? I'm guilty of the "pull back" and my disappearing acts. It's usually because I'm dating another girl that's showing me more love, and I'm not good at "dating" many girls at once. ... Link to post Share on other sites
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