Don't know what the problem is

[kashmir]

Last night I went out to 2 parties. I was having fun for a while, but then I was getting tired and realized that no one was really talking to me anymore, so I left.

 

I'm naturally shy when it comes to breaking the ice with a girl. I usually like to wait for definite eye contact between us or a smile from her before I feel comfortable to go up to her and talk. Last night though, not a single instance of that happened. No girls gave me a look or smile or anything. At first I didn't care and was just enjoying myself. I think I seemed pretty open and relaxed. I was talking and laughing with some other guys and was even dancing a bit, haha. Now and then, though, I'd take a look around at some of the girls, and they'd pretty much ignore me. Eventually I said "screw it" and just went up to a few girls and said hi. They were all cold to me. One of them was controlling the music. I said something to her, she turned around, gave me a face, and then walked away. Nothing said. I know I have an acceptable and decent appearance and vibe, but hell, sometimes girls look at me like I have horns growing out of my head.

 

I'm really confused with what's going on. I look myself over to try to figure out what the problem is. As anyone else, I have flaws, but nothing major that should stop me from seeing even a little bit of success. I mean, while I'd really like to meet some girls and spend some time with them, I'm not totally obsessed with it. I know I would be happier if I had some positive interactions with girls but at the moment I'm content and getting by on my own. I go to these parties not with the expectation of hooking up or getting a girlfriend or getting numbers. I go to have fun and to talk to some girls. They just always seem so cold to me. They seem to be there only for their own clique of friends and no one else.

 

I'm on this site and I'm writing this because like anyone else, I want to be happier. As a 19 year old boy, I'm inevitably going to have desires to be around girls. You can't really tell me to just forget them, especially when I have little experience with them. I feel like if I can see some progress towards those desires, then I'll move from being okay and content to being happier. I believe I actually have a very low sex drive for my age. Some of my friends with girlfriends need to have sex at least every day or be around their girlfriends all the time. I had a few one night stands months ago, and after them (which weren't even that pleasurable or enjoyable for me), I didn't think about girls or sex for weeks. If I had a girlfriend, I think I'd be totally content with having sex once a month, which is weird for guys or even girls my age.

 

But my point is that I have trouble getting even that, and I'm not sure what's going on. I'm afraid to admit it, but it could be my mental conditions that made me socially awkward through the years. While I worked past them for the most part, I feel like maybe there's this sub-conscious barrier which I have no control over that repels people away from me. I don't know. I'll stop writing now. This is already plenty to read.

[Benique]

I feel you are a very sensitive guy , Who is in real every girl`s dream .

Subconsciously or consciously every woman just Dreams to be beside a sensitive and so heartful person like you .

 

>>>The only thing you are to do is To stop focusing on the 'problem' you are mentioning here ... <<<

 

You need to be in a real love connection with the girl to have sex with her .. and then you will surprise yourself how many many many times a month you will need to have it:cool:

[kashmir]

On the outside I can be pretty rough and stern. My friend's girlfriend always tells me how I'd be a perfect "sexy bad guy in a movie," lol. That may be, but once you get to know me I know I can be sensitive and even kinda soft. I don't show many people that side of me, but I know I can and will if I ever felt inclined to bring it out. It just seems like no one ever gives me that chance.