Whatever happened to.....

[Geishawhelk]

The Art of Conversation?

 

With all the technological means of communication, at our disposal, (Myspace, Facebook, Msn, IM, texting, e-mails....) is it possible that people are forgetting the joys of - *GASP!!* - face-to-face conversation - !?

I see so many posts hinging on comments read on these chat/friendship forums, or who said what to whom, by text, ar what was said in IM....

"what did he mean....?" "Why did she write......" What should I respond?" "Should I txt back" and worst of all....."Cn eny1 help me, pls, bcos I need u 2 guys 2 gv me input...."

 

The biggest problem with communication, is that a huge percentage of it, is made up of body language.

 

This is obviously completely missing when we choose to chat to people electronically - so are we losing the gift of being able to understand people?

To literally "see where they're coming from"?

 

Does anyone else feel that there is an awkwardness in approaching people, dating, talking..... because we're forgetting how to.....?

 

(Courting used to be so much simpler when all we had was pen and paper!)

[Quinch]

Isn't it ironic that you're asking this question on an internet forum

 

You are right though. Some of my friends recently had a huge falling out because they did all their communication via facebook/text/email and confusions predictably resulted. Nobody thought to sit down face-to-face and work it out.

[amaysngrace]

Don't even get me started here. I dread the day when I finally have to break down and get my kids a cell phone. It's innevitable. It will happen. Still I hate the thought of it.

 

Right now we talk to each other. If we need to use the phone we do it at home. When we are together we talk to one another. I know cell phones will change all that.

 

My BF and I have been together going on three years. I don't even know his email address. He knows one of mine because it's easy to remember but he never emailed me.

 

When we want to talk we pick up the phone. Which comes second to us stopping by to see each other. I see him several times a day usually. In summer I call before I go to the beach so he knows which beach I'm on so he can meet me there.

 

My kids really wanted cell phones. But I told them about the extinction of the bees theory that you posted on a4a's stock up your pantry thread and they've expressed mixed thoughts about having them now.

 

Thanks for that.

[FF84]

When things are written down in black and white so much can be taken out of context.

 

It's never wise to discuss serious issues by email/text etc. But it's part of our culture now. Communication evolves, not always for the better of course.

[Geishawhelk]

Isn't it ironic that you're asking this question on an internet forum

 

I agree.

If I had all your 'phone numbers, I'd be calling you all!

 

You are right though. Some of my friends recently had a huge falling out because they did all their communication via facebook/text/email and confusions predictably resulted. Nobody thought to sit down face-to-face and work it out.

 

This is constantly - and increasingly - the first bit of advice a lot of respondents to posts, give:

 

"Why don't you ask him/her?"

 

"Why don't you talk to him/her?"

 

Because it's obvious that the OP, asking for advice, either didn't think of it, or simply has no clue where to begin!

 

Tsk tsk tsk! *Shakes head....*!!

[2sure]

Geisha is 100% correct.

 

I fear just like "cursive" writing, my daughter's generation may lose the ART of conversation.

 

Its a learned and acquired skill. It doesnt just happen and it IS required in many circumstances, as well as a real pleasure to engage in.

[suzy61]

At the end of the day, all the talking we're doing on forums and with text messages, etc......we're doing it from a room on our own, where we're sitting in front of a screen.Can't change that...

[Trialbyfire]

I agree Geish!

 

It's weird how close you think you've become to someone via text, email, etc. Then you find out they're not like that at all. This includes talking to someone on the phone.

 

It's why LDRs and close cyber-friendships, aren't for me. I've learned my lessons.

[ThisGuy85]

I fear just like "cursive" writing, my daughter's generation may lose the ART of conversation.

 

It's funny you mention that. The other day I had to leave a note for my GF. I had to stop quite a few times and try to remember how to write several different letters in cursive. I thought to myself "My god! have I forgotten how to write in cursive" It's a good thing I was the only one home, Because it was terribly embarrassing!

 

But back on topic, I happen to enjoy all the conveniences technology has given us. But on that same note, I think most people fail to realize what there supposed to be used for. When cell phones first came out, They were supposed to be for emergencies and work matters. But now people live on their phone. They can't leave the house without it, And if they forget it they completely freak out. Same thing with text messaging. It was supposed to be for short quick messages, That didn't require an actual phone call ie. "I'm running late." or "whats for dinner?" Instead people are using them for full on conversations. What really makes me scratch my head, Is when you see people texting for 10...15... even 20 minutes. I wonder to myself "Why don't you just call them?" Whats even worse is that now text has it's own "lazy language" words like "you" are replaced with "U" same with "To/Too/Two replaced with 2" I wonder sometimes if people of the future will forget how to spell all together?

 

But sadly the times have changed. If your not changing with them, You'll be left in the dust!

[Geishawhelk]

This is why I personally don't like reading posts on here, particularly from new members, which have been presented in "Tx-spk"

 

To use a hypothetical example:

 

"hey u guyz i need yr help my gf wuz txting her frend n she cudnt spk 2 long coz we were q-ing 4 the cinima but her frend sed sh wd join us 4 a bite 2 eet n we waitd 4 2 hrs but she neva shwd m i rite 2 b mad?

wot shud i do? Sined, shekspr."

 

I've never actually seen anything that bad really, but it's only a matter of time, I'm sure - and I have seen some posts in my time, that come dangerously close!

[IcemanJB]

It's very sad - it is in fact disappearing!

 

I HATE talking on the phone. HATE it. My longest conversation in the last few years has probably been 10 minutes. My ex was the same way, so if we wanted to talk about something (and we were close enough), we would instead meet up. I'm fine with text messaging because I refuse to talk about serious things through it. Random funny comments or "where are we meeting?" sort of texts are really convienient and fine by me.

 

I would SO MUCH rather talk to someone face-to-face. I find it so much easier to get a read on them, to understand them much better. My ex told me it's scary how well I can read her - even after we broke up. I think this is a skill that is disappearing from everyday life sadly. Now I'm no master at it (everyone is awkward at some points), but some people just DO NOT know how to interact with others in real life.

[Geishawhelk]

Ice, you're the kind of guy Id' like to meet! (I'm with someone, btw..... ) But it's so refreshing to 'meet' a man who values face-to-face dialogue!

[IcemanJB]

Ice, you're the kind of guy Id' like to meet! (I'm with someone, btw..... ) But it's so refreshing to 'meet' a man who values face-to-face dialogue!

 

Haha, fair enough. I'm in no condition to be dating right now anyway. Plus, you're across the pond!

 

That is one thing about my ex that is hard to come by - a girl that is "brave" enough to talk about heavy things face to face rather than hide behind phone calls or text messages - even when she knows she might end up being a mess while doing it.