I got a message back from a girl Im interested in. I think it looks good, maybe?

[AloneinTexas]

About a year ago, I had a friend email a girl on my behalf since my email was being funky. At any rate, I thought she was very cute and looked to be single. She emailed back saying she was dating someone but we could "all hang out sometime."

 

I forgot about her until now.

 

Today I wrote this to her:

 

Hey!

 

Awhile back (probably close to 9 months ago) a friend of mine by the name **** ***** had sent you a Facebook message on my behalf asking if you were interested in doing something. I do not recall specific details of what she wrote or even what your reply back was. At the time, my FB account was acting funny. The point of all this is simply I find you to be very cute and would like to entertain bowling or something. I have no idea what your reaction to all this is/what your status is/ or if you think I am some internet creeper haha. I ran Track/XC for *** **** from 00-05 and still am around ***** every so often. Look forward to your response.

 

Sam

 

P.S. If you like Dane Cook, here is a great video that we can all relate to.

-------------------------------------

 

She wrote back literally 2 hours later ( I was shocked )

 

Hey there,

 

I do recall a message earlier this year. It's a small world I tell you. I haven't dated anyone in a long time, haven't really wanted to just enjoying/ trying to finish school! But I would more than likely be up for bowling/coffee or something. Not sure why but I decided to take 8 classes this semester?? Lol. So Christmas break would be a good time if that works. Have a good one, talk to you soon.

 

Christie

 

P.S. This is a funny clip from Cook, Ive seen it before he is a funny man

--------------------------------

 

Seems like she's up for something. How good should I read into this? And whats my next move? How long to "play it cool"?

[Geishawhelk]

Write back, ask her to let you know what date she'll be free from, and to get in touch to arrange something. You really look forward to it, and thanks for coming back! Really nice of her!

 

Howzzat - ?!

[rod_in_gtown]

I can't believe that actually worked... Well, she's giving you an opening, you should definitely try to firm up some plans if you're not in the same town, find out when she'll be back and see if she wants to do something a couple of days after she returns. Otherwise find out when she's done for break.

 

Good luck buddy!

[AloneinTexas]

i wrote to her and asked her if after december 17th would work for her (since m taking a small solo trip somewhere) and this is what i got back

 

Hey,

 

Yes, it is a small world. Actually the 8 classes haven't been to bad, I've gotten the time management down pretty well and really really appreciate the weekends. Plus I am a pretty laid back gal so I don't get stressed easliy...(although next week may be a tad different!!) I usually do 15 hours a semester as well buuuuuut....that got me behind as well so I am cramming in my 5th year in hopes to graduate in May 09. Sounds like you're off to a fun roadtrip, enjoy it. Hey I saw you're friends with ********How do you know her? She's a really good friend of mine I ran CC and went to High School with her. Anyways, have a good night.

 

Christie

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I replied back something of similar length and at the end said lood luck on finals. i didnt ask again about anything regarding us meeting up, so not sure how i should squeeze that in there again so she responds. of i can just be more assertive and ask if a specific day works (maybe thats what she is looking for)

[Star Gazer]

I haven't dated anyone in a long time, haven't really wanted to just enjoying/ trying to finish school! But I would more than likely be up for bowling/coffee or something.

 

I dunno. To me this is a very clear indication that she'd be willing to hang out, but it would NOT be a "date."

[Angel1111]

I think she's saying that she'll be happy to go out with you and see how things go. But I also get the impression that she's letting you know that school is a high priority and that she is extremely focused on that when she's in school. Most men don't like it when their gf is really busy and they tend to put on the pressure because they want a lot of attention. I don't think she'd be able to give you that attention and she's not up for someone pressuring her about it.

[AloneinTexas]

I do not have her phone number. She replied to me today something short, after asking about how I knew one of her mutual friends:

 

Hey (again)

 

 

Thats so crazy you knew her- I am telling you it's IS a small world! Anyhow have a good weekend and don't study to hard? Just Kidding!

 

Christie

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I am thinking of going no contact until I get back from my trip in 2 weeks, and asking her if she would like to go out for bowling/coffee. I find it wierd she mentioned she would be up for it over break sometime, then when I made a date (after Dec 17 asking if it were good for her) she said nothing of it.

 

Ugh I hate this stupid stuff, I wish it were easier. I guess the only plus I see is that we did write each other 3 times yesterday, so not really playing it cool with one another.

[AloneinTexas]

Here are all the emails back and forth, maybe someone can help me

 

Hey!

 

Awhile back (probably close to 9 months ago) a friend of mine by the name **** **** had sent you a ******** message on my behalf asking if you were interested in doing something. I do not recall specific details of what she wrote or even what your reply back was. At the time, my FB account was acting funny. The point of all this is simply I find you to be very cute and would like to entertain bowling or something. I have no idea what your reaction to all this is/what your status is/ or if you think I am some internet creeper haha. I ran Track/XC for **** *****from 00-05 and still am around **** every so often. Look forward to your response.

 

James

 

P.S. If you like Dane Cook, here is a great video that we can all relate to.

 

http://www.*******.com/watch?v=i4nsI02gnUk

--------------------------------------

Hey there,

 

I do recall a message earlier this year. It's a small world I tell you. I haven't dated anyone in a long time, haven't really wanted to just enjoying/ trying to finish school! But I would more than likely be up for bowling/coffee or something. Not sure why but I decided to take 8 classes this semester?? Lol. So Christmas break would be a good time if that works. Have a good one, talk to you soon.

 

Megan

 

P.S. This is a funny clip from Cook, Ive seen it before he is a funny man

-----------------------------------------------

Hey there again,

 

Glad you remembered that msg, and yes I agree its a small world! So Christmas break sounds great to me. I live up in ***** so its pretty close by to ****.

8 classes??? What's your major? PhD in the electrical engineering with a focus on thermocouplers? haha jk. But sheesh! That sounds like a nightmare! I can imagine you probably live off of Starbucks if I had to guess. I usually did the standard 15 hours and found that to be alot!

I am going to be taking a solo trip to VA and MD to visit some college teamates from Sunday until the following Wednesday the next week (17th.) Will anytime after that work for you (barring Christmas eve/day of course.)

 

James

 

Here's another vid for some comic relief amongst your studies. Hopefully you haven't seen it yet!

 

http://www.*******.com/watch?v=MvgN5gCuLac

--------------------------------------------------------

Hey,

 

Yes, it is a small world. Actually the 8 classes haven't been to bad, I've gotten the time management down pretty well and really really appreciate the weekends. Plus I am a pretty laid back gal so I don't get stressed easliy...(although next week may be a tad different!!) I usually do 15 hours a semester as well buuuuuut....that got me behind as well so I am cramming in my 5th year in hopes to graduate in May 09. Sounds like you're off to a fun roadtrip, enjoy it. Hey I saw you're friends with **** ****? How do you know her? She's a really good friend of mine I ran CC and went to High School with her. Anyways, have a good night.

 

Megan

----------------------------------------------------

Hey again,

 

Well im glad to hear you have your wits-about-you to handle such a daunting task as 8 classes! Im pretty laid back myself, sometimes too laid back.

**** ****? I knew of her in high school since she was pretty fast. West branch would show up at some of our meets and maybe conference at **** *****(not sure though.) I never talked to her back then however. I got set up on a date with her last year by her coach whom I race (although he is 35 now). We dated last year for a while around this time until she put the kebosh on it because the distance (4 hours to **** ****) was too much for her.

Good luck in finals week, knock em dead!

 

James

--------------------------------------------

Hey (again)

 

 

Thats so crazy you knew her- I am telling you it's IS a small world! Anyhow have a good weekend and don't study to hard? Just Kidding!

 

Megan

 

 

 

So where did I go wrong? Or am I still okay on this?

[lamaman3]

Hey James - I think youre initial emails put a bit too much pressure on her - the whole "I think you are cute, are you dating someone, can we go on a date" etc.

 

Most girls get alot of guys hitting on them - differentiate yourself a bit and at the same time make it seem like no big deal - dont put yourself out there so much right away.

 

Something initial like this:

 

Hey! Remember me? We met up that time xyz, good times - anyways - I stumbled across your profile, what have you been up to?

 

Her: blah blah blah

 

Oh thats awesome me too, yea im blah blah blah - hey are u around this weekend? Lets meet up for a drink and catch up - whats your #?

 

Her: 555-5555

 

Call her, tell her youre at x bar in her area and she should come keep you company.

 

Can you see how this approach eases her into it without the whole "Lets schedule a day where we can go on a formal date because I find you to be attractive"

[AloneinTexas]

I like your advice

 

but do i send it now or wait a while

maybe i have shown her that im not playing it cool, judging from all our messages were sent in the same day

[kashmir]

Personally, calling Dane Cook a funny man is a dealbreaker for me, but that's just me.

[AloneinTexas]

Yeah, i was going to use a humorous reply, i just dont know if i should do it now or wait a few days or even a week. maybe now since that seems to be the theme? carpe diem?

[kashmir]

Honestly, I think facebook is the slayer of opportunities. It's a horrible way to get in touch with a girl you might like through a friend. Don't know why, but it just seems to kill attraction. I had this girl in HS who friended me back then. The signs that she liked me back then were blunt and clear, but I was having mental issues and wasn't in any condition to do anything social. Over this past summer, years later, I actually had a dream with that girl in it...first time I thought of her in years. I took it as some kind of Native American prophetic vision and said hi to her the next day on facebook. We had a long conversation back and fourth, but when I finally asked to meet up with her over the summer she blew me off. I was sure this girl liked me back then. Time also tends to kill stuff like this. You've gotta strike while the iron is hot and the attraction is burning.

 

But I'm surprised by how much this girl responded to you. In your first message you came out and said you were attracted to her when you've never met her before. Very few girls would respond if a guy sent them that. She either thinks you're attractive too or is very very polite. Her response saying, "I haven't dated anyone in a long time, haven't really wanted to just enjoying/ trying to finish school! But I would more than likely be up for bowling/coffee or something" would normally be seen as a "let's just be friends" thing, but you have to realize that you came on very direct in the beginning. Even if she found you attractive, I don't think she would say to a guy she's never met over facebook, "Yeah I'd totally be up for that!"

 

I do think that this isn't going anywhere, though. You need to realize how hard it is to do over facebook. I'm sure she finds you interesting and safe enough to message you back, maybe even attractive, but not enough to actually see you in person and make something real out of it. That's usually how this turns out.

[Star Gazer]

I just don't think she's interested romantically. There is absolutely no flirtation coming from her.

[AloneinTexas]

I guess i will make assumptions only after i request a day set for "hanging out" and if she bites then ill take that as a positive sign. i have a feeling the date itself (if it happens) will be fairly platonic though. but its just me reading into her emails and knowing it would be hard to find a girl so giddy about my advances,

[Star Gazer]

Yeah, I'm not saying not to give it a shot. You'll never know without asking. I just don't want you to read too much into her messages and get your hopes up. Treat it as friends hanging out, and if you feel like she has a romantic spark for you, then great. But try not to have expectations or hopes going in.

[AloneinTexas]

I wrote to her asking if the 19th would work, and had a bit of humor in my message. I had my doubts as to if I would even hear back, but I did , this is what she said

 

That sounds good to me..I haven't bowled in years so it should be a funny scene! Have a good one

 

 

 

 

How do I proceed from here? Ask for her number? Or wait a week or so before the BIG DAY before asking her for it? Or continue to message her?

[likestolaugh]

Personally, calling Dane Cook a funny man is a dealbreaker for me, but that's just me.

 

 

haha! agreed 100%. Although if both of them like Dane Cook then maybe they're meant for each other... since there can't be that many people like that out there.... :p

[AloneinTexas]

I ended up getting her number.

 

Her reply was "hey, my number is 555-555-5555, adios muchachos."

 

next move? its in your hands guys haha