jpl Posted November 30, 2008 Posted November 30, 2008 helllp. so ive tried no contact before. and everytime i do after like two weeks she contacts me! its usually a text or I/M usually something simple like how are you! and i always answer because i just cant be rude to her and completely ignore her like most of you had told me to. if i didnt answer it just seems mean and i dont want her to think that because i still care about her shes not a evil person or anything. but honestly i dont want to answer her anymore.. it gives me false hope. what can i say or do everytime she contacts me that doesnt make me look desperate or mean. instead of just completely ignoring her. thank you for lisening!
Surfer Dude Posted November 30, 2008 Posted November 30, 2008 She dumped you right? You have absolutely no obligation to maintain contact with her. She didn't want you to be a part of her life, you don't need to try and be her "friend", you owe her nothing. I really hate these control freaks who dump people and then try to stay their friends. Screw that, if she wanted you to be something significant to her, she'd beg you to take her back.
Gremio Posted November 30, 2008 Posted November 30, 2008 I had to go through this last year. A LTR that just didn't work out in the end. It was hard for me but I had to end it. To this day she still contacts me once in a while asking how I am. I put my feelings aside and reply objectively, to be polite. If you broke up recently, tell her the truth. You need some time to move on, and her contacting you only makes it worse.
EmperorR Posted November 30, 2008 Posted November 30, 2008 helllp. so ive tried no contact before. and everytime i do after like two weeks she contacts me! its usually a text or I/M usually something simple like how are you! and i always answer because i just cant be rude to her and completely ignore her like most of you had told me to. if i didnt answer it just seems mean and i dont want her to think that because i still care about her shes not a evil person or anything. but honestly i dont want to answer her anymore.. it gives me false hope. what can i say or do everytime she contacts me that doesnt make me look desperate or mean. instead of just completely ignoring her. thank you for lisening! IGNORE HER, you owe her nohing, she dumped you right? just delete the text and go on in life, it's not mean. Mean is being dumped and kicked to the curb, mean is the other person trying to heal and her keeping on contacting you setting you back that's mean.
SarahT111 Posted November 30, 2008 Posted November 30, 2008 You sound like me! My ex dumped me and treated me like crap. But I feel like I cant stoop to that level, I feel really rude if he contacts me and I dont reply. I go by the rule that he if asks a legitimate question I will reply but if its just mindless chatter I wont. I NEVER ask any information about him, I just answer what he has asked in a polite but not friendly manner and leave it at that.I also NEVER contact him. Im literally not able to ignore someone, I dont have that in me Although I wish I did sometimes! Sometimes I want to ask him to just leave me alone but then It looks to him like im not over him and I dont really want that either!! Its a tricky situation!
Gremio Posted November 30, 2008 Posted November 30, 2008 Sarah, I am the same. That is actually one of the things that truly pisses me off, to be blunt. I am courteous to everyone, even ex's. I cannot stand being ignored or blown off.
Saesan Posted November 30, 2008 Posted November 30, 2008 There must be something about 2 weeks - it seems to be a pretty common period of NC being broken that I see on here in different threads. Every two weeks of NC my ex txts me, asks how i'm doing, tells me that he's missing me and still loves me, and once sent me a pic of his niece. I'm coming up on two weeks again later this week, should be interesting to see if I get anything. I'm hoping not.
Author jpl Posted December 1, 2008 Author Posted December 1, 2008 omg i know i hate the two week text.. its funny how much a simple text like how are you can make you go crazy.. i tend to get so happy when i get it though. but im finally realizing she really doesnt care how i am. shes just trying to see if ill still text her back asap and if i still have feeling for her. its her way of knowing that shes still got me. and i still love her. but im down with that. ill continue to answer. but its not going to be anything more than. a " doing great!" text and not asking her about herself either. the worst part is we have the same exact friends and we tend to throw lots of parties.. so no matter what even if theres no contact.. ill end up seeing her which screws me up also.
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