Cat66 Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 Before I go into the current situation that brought me here, I thought I would share a bit of who I am and how I perceive myself to operate on relationship levels. My last serious relationship ended officially 6 years ago, and it took over a year to really get over it and come to a place free of pain and heartache. I followed all the rules, played all the games, he came back several times only to finally leave for good. We are friends now. But working through that the right way not only helped me reach a place where I was NOT vulnerable to just any man who payed attention to me, it allowed me to be very selective. The sad thing is it would be a very long time before I would find anyone attractive or exciting to me. I was starting to wonder if the loss of who I felt was my one true love completely killed all ability to ever be aroused by the opposite sex again. Until I met Him. It was almost 3 years ago. We lived in the same condos, and it just happened that we met at the pool. I was intstantly attracted to my own amazement. We started seeing eachother very intimately soon after and I fell hard. about a month and a half later he sat in front of me very upset and crying told me his ex gf had announced she was 3 months preg, and he had to do the right thing and make it work for the child. They got married, and I saw him a few times after, excuses on both our parts just to say hi, or a wave in passing in the parking lot. They moved, and he never left my mind. I knew in my heart of hearts that if they broke up before, then the odds of it truely working out were slim to none. A year ago I found his profile on myspace and shot him a message asking if he was still happilly married. He didnt log in for a year, and to my surprise I recieved a message from him a month ago. ET He has been divorced since August. We started seeing eachother again, and all the same feelings for me were still there strong as ever. But I kept it cool, it was very easy for me to be a mystery, because I just didnt offer up anything personal that wasnt asked. We kept it light, I let him do the initiating, although I would send text next day saying I enjoyed our time together. But this last time, (it will be 2 weeks on tuesday) I knew instinctively when he got up for work something was wrong. But it didnt hit me until thursday. The day after he left I sent him a sexy picture I had taken on my phone, and no response. I broke all my own rules and texted asking if he didnt like the picture. He wrote back sorry I did, just been really busy. Kids are sick etc. I responded that I understood and hope they are feeling better soon. Havent contacted him since, havent heard from him since. I just dont understand how someone can just walk away when not pushed. So I am left to assume he is definately NOT into me. I find myself reading page after page on site after site reading into everything to suite my assumptions. But it is all irrellevant as long as what I am creating in my head and not the reality that if he desired me my phone would be ringing. My question is, if a guy finds a girl attractive, easy going and drama free to spend time with, why not call her anymore? A part of me still expects a phone call, and I hate that.
Gremio Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 From your story, perhaps he has way too much going on in his life. When you first met, everything was easy going. But now he has a child, a divorce, and perhaps a nagging ex eating at him. It's possible he has too many issues to think about a relationship.
Green Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 I'm in a situation now where I'm ignoring a girl and stopped callin her and I bet in her mind she see's nothing she did wrong but she has been putting me through drama... other than that explenation who knows... if thats you in the avatar... I can barely see you but ... seems hott
SushiX Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 My question is, if a guy finds a girl attractive, easy going and drama free to spend time with, why not call her anymore? Maybe because he knows you'll always be there when he needs you. Try to make yourself unavailable by seeing other people. He might just come back but you probably wouldn't want him anymore by then.
Isolde Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 I'm in a situation now where I'm ignoring a girl and stopped callin her and I bet in her mind she see's nothing she did wrong but she has been putting me through drama... other than that explenation who knows... if thats you in the avatar... I can barely see you but ... seems hott What did she do to you?
Author Cat66 Posted November 29, 2008 Author Posted November 29, 2008 Gremio, I am hoping that is the case. KMT, Im sorry she isnt willing to see her part in this, I know I was none of the above, so Im at a loss for words. Yes the avatar is me, thank you. Sushix, I dont know how I could have sent the message I would always be there, but that is definately a possibility that could be going through his mind. Thursday will be 2 weeks since I have contacted him, I have no intention on doing so, but there are moments where I find it almost unbearable to just text and say hi. How pathetic, I know. If they arent contacting you, no point in letting them know they are on your mind. I am not against seeing other people, he is just the only one I was intimate with and wanted to be. I have enjoyed approving comments from people in my same city (attractive men) on my myspace because I know he is looking at my profile when he logs in. I know it sounds cruel but I have read so much that it is important to stay desirable and active. Thank you all for your replies
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