hereandnow Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 After not seeing my ex for a little over 2 weeks, I've run into her 2 nights in a row. We've been broken up about a month. The first time we talked very briefly. Well, last night we both ended up going out to eat with a group of people. Circumstantially, she ended up sitting across the table from me. So we're eating and getting along fine, she's talking to me, smiling at me, everything's good. (As much so as it can be.) There's this guy sitting next to her, he's a pretty intense character and he's coming on kind of strong to her (not in a flirtatious way) and he's trying to get her to go dancing afterwards. (A group of us were already planning on going.) After we eat my ex asks me if I want to smoke with her and we go outside. She tells me that her and said guy aren't dating or anything. She tells me I look and sound good, we talk. Then she tells me again she wanted me to know that she's not dating him. It was funny because people were coming out while we were talking and they asked me, "didn't you guys just break up recently?" "sounds like you're getting along really good," etc. Well my ex didn't come out with us after. I'm just not real sure what this might mean. I don't want to feed the false hope beast but it kind of has. I mean, why would she want me to know that she isn't dating him. Our breakup started out as a "break" that she initiated, and I know all about "breaks" from LS, but I don't know. We're in our late 20s, early 30s so this isn't a schoolyard thing. I would appreciate anyone's feedback on this.
Cub Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 That's rather irrelevant, my friend. If she really wants you back, the ball is still in her court. Until she breaks down at your door, keep on moving on. Words are untrustworthy - I think we've come to depend on them too much. You can only trust her actions.
Teuen101 Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 gotta love the games- it seems its all about some sort of evil mind game.. My dad told me along time ago- " If a woman wants you ... she'll let you know and you'll have you're hands full" sounds to me she likes the idea of 2 guys after her - I'm sure that otheir guy saw you 2 talking- I'm sure she knew he was watching. oh the games people play..
Ronni_W Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 Why not feed that 'beast of hope' with something different? -- Tell her that maybe you're just stupid but you didn't get whatever message she was trying to give you by telling you, twice, that she and that guy are not an item; but you do think it must be important to her, or she would not have repeated it. Then ask her if she would like to clarify the message for you. If she does, just keep asking for clarification until you are sure that you totally understand the message. If, eventually, you find yourself saying, "Are you asking me if I'm interested in trying a reconciliation?" that is fine. (Of course, be prepared for a "no" answer...or a "yes" one, for that matter.) The 'beast' will be satisfied when you do what you need to do, to satisfy it. And, if you don't do that, it does kinda turn into a schoolyard thing, doesn't it?
Author hereandnow Posted November 29, 2008 Author Posted November 29, 2008 Thanks for the replies. The thing is, I was almost certain she wouldn't be dating this guy anyway. I really wasn't concerned. The guy told me before he even knew she was my ex that she was a friend of his, he's not getting into a relationship, etc. There's other reasons too. Anyway, I know better than to throw myself into high gear over this. At the same time I'd be lying if I said it didn't give me some kind of hope. But it's just that little natural flicker that occurs, I don't know if I could stop it completely anyway.
EmperorR Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 it's bs, its just telling you just incase you thought they were dating and you were moving on, just slow down there is still a slimmer of hope let it go bro, my ex plaed those games sh*t with me to, how she's not dating her new friend, she would never date soemone she is working with, how she still had feelings for me etc., a week later
Gremio Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 I believe that that still may have feelings as she obviously cares about what you think since she pulled you aside to tell you she isn't dating the guy she was next to. BUT... I wouldn't do anything at all. Forget her. There are no such things as breaks. If you break up, don't get back together as the reason you broke up will always come up again.
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