People that you know you'll never see again

[Bells]

Ever tried to approach a strange women in public and try to ask her out? Remember that episode of Seinfeld where Jerry meets a woman in an elevator and gets her number?

 

And I'm talking about you only have a time limit to get their number, too.

 

I was out at some kind of fair, with hay rides and stuff, and I saw this woman holding one of those BIG Turkey Legs, I saw her with it, and said, "Holy cow, you going to eat all that?!" And she laughed a bit, and goes, "I'm not sure."

 

Just small remarks like that.

 

Now these were just fleeting moments, she was with some friends/family, a kid or 2 in the group, where we passed each other (heck she could have been a wife for all I knew, but I didn't see a ring on her finger)

 

And I saw her again about 5 mins later, with the Turkey Leg gone, I saw her and said, "Holy cow, you it it all already?"

 

And she points to her purse, and there's the rest of it she's saving for later. She says, "I didn't want to torture anyone else" (You know, in case other people were starving)

 

The reason this woman was so significant, because she had this beautiful smile...but she wore sunglasses (couldn't see her eyes)

 

But I'm with my friends...we get done with what we're doing, get something to eat from a vendor and sat down at a picnic table.

 

Then this woman and HER group comes and sits with us.

 

Only problem was, they didn't stick around for long, I was expecting them to stay for at least a little while longer.

 

I say, "Hey, we gotta stop meeting like this!" And she goes "Yeah, that was pretty fun" (She was on a ride with her kid or something)

 

I asked her where she was from and she was listening to the game on a portable radio...and she was wearing at Dallas Cowboys Hat.

 

Then I asked her, "So, you a Dallas Cowboys fan?" And she laughs, and goes, "How could you tell?"

 

Anyhow, she had to get up and go with the rest of her family/friends/slash group and goes, "It was nice meeting you" and leaves. Apparently they got done resting and went together to another part of the grounds.

 

I couldn't say," Hey, before you go, can I get your number?"

 

Ever been in a situation wherey ou had a time limit of some sort, but if it wasn't long enough, it woudl be "Uncool" to get her number?

[Cherry Blossom 35]

I think if you were really wanting to see this person again it would be better to give out your number. You could say, hey, I'm not sure your status, but you've got a great smile. Call me if you're interested. Something cheesy like that.

 

I wouldn't ask for their number. Most people will not give a perfect stranger their number.

 

If I randomly met a guy who I thought was cute and he gave me his number, I would think what a pleasant surprise. If I didn't think he was cute, then so what. I never have to talk to him again.

 

For the record, I know someone who met her boyfriend on the Metro. They sat next to each other and talked for a bit. When it was his stop he gave her his number. She called, obviously.

 

I think there are two keys with this type of scenario.

 

1. You must look for their body language and be somewhat confident that they would want to speak to you. Are they looking at you? Smiling? Is there stance open to you? Are they facing you or leaning into you?

 

If they have their shoulders crossed, or they are turned away from you, or if they have a blank look or scowl on their face, don't do it. I know that sounds obvious, but to many guys it isn't. I have been approached many times by unwanted suitors, but I was giving them NO indication that I wanted to speak to them AT ALL. It sounds like this woman was receptive to speaking with you.

 

2. The other key is to give out the number and then LEAVE. Don't hang around. If she is intrigued, it will give her something to think about. If she is uncomfortable, then you avoid any of that painfulness.

[alphamale]

I think if you were really wanting to see this person again it would be better to give out your number. You could say, hey, I'm not sure your status, but you've got a great smile. Call me if you're interested. Something cheesy like that.

from a male perspective i wouldn't recommend that...

[berrieh]

It's pretty much how I met the guy I'm dating now. I saw him in a public place -- actually kind of a funny/situation story I won't get into, practically a "meet cute" -- we chatted a bit, I thought he seemed cute and cool, so I said, "It doesn't seem like you're here with anybody, so I'm guessing you're single." He said yes. I asked him if he'd like to call me sometime, and he took my number down and called me right away. Then texted me later that night for a date. Voila.

 

Thing is, nothing can be lost by asking. The worst you hear is "no" which is the same as not-asking in this case because you'll not see them again. Just as long as you aren't pushy or creepy or keep asking, it's fine.

[ipetree]

Berrie, exactly.. Somebody needs to pull the trigger. And if you hear a no, who really cares? The title of the thread is even "people you will never see again"

 

I did this twice at the grocery store, and went 2 for 2. One girl I dated for over a year, and the other wanted to date but I already met someone else.

[Lizzie60]

I was out at some kind of fair, with hay rides and stuff, and I saw this woman holding one of those BIG Turkey Legs, I saw her with it, and said, "Holy cow, you going to eat all that?!" And she laughed a bit, and goes, "I'm not sure."

 

Ouch! nice introduction.. (it's like saying.. holy COW are you going to stuff your face with this huge turkey leg.. I'm impressed)...

 

And I saw her again about 5 mins later, with the Turkey Leg gone, I saw her and said, "Holy cow, you it it all already?"

 

And she points to her purse, and there's the rest of it she's saving for later. She says, "I didn't want to torture anyone else" (You know, in case other people were starving)

 

Holy COW stuffed half the huge turkey leg and puts it in her purse for later.. WOW.. she must have a teflon stomach... salmonella-free.

 

I find your approach quite funny actually.. and yes... if you were 'game enough' to talk to her like you did.. I don't see why you 'chickened you' on asking her number..

 

You felt quite comfortable with her..

[Taramere]

One time when I was on my travels in Oz, the bus was just setting off when it stopped suddenly. This guy I'd spoken to a few times got on, walked down to my seat, gave me his address - and without giving me a chance to say anything, he ran back up the aisle, told the driver "ok, you can go now mate" and jumped off.

 

There was a chorus of laughter and Aaawwws, and it was pretty embarrassing, but also very nice in a made-my-heart-beat-a-litte-faster way. I hadn't picked up at all that he was interested until that point, which really added to it. Not that there was an awful lot I could do with his address, as I was leaving the country a couple of days later, but still...

 

So my vote would be yes, men should definitely do more of that kind of thing. One of my brother's friends is married to a woman who he stole from another man she was out on a date with years ago. He noticed that she was looking bored in the guy's company - so as he walked past their table to go to the bar, he slipped her a note saying "be sure and invite me to the wedding" with his number on it. She called him the next day.

[LittleDove]

I met a nice guy on a plane a few months ago. We chatted for an hour flight, and then he turned and gave me his number, while I had my mobile out, turning it on after the plane landed...it was smooth, he saw an opportunity and took it!!

I thought it was sweet- and id just had a break up so I was very flattered. He was younger, goodlooking and a pro fighter-turned SAS army guy! I was REALLY flattered. What a man.

I did send him a txt, but chickened out meeting him because I was still very messed up because of the break up.

He has my number, and I have his, and I might call him again now im feeling better!!! and this thread reminded me!!!

 

Never ask for a girls number....i wouldnt have given this guy mine, had he asked...

It was nice to be given his though. And by sending him a txt, he got my number too;)

[sid3]

According to all the dating gurus it's very unconfident to give a woman your number. Right, who cares! Giving your's or asking for her's, do what you feel like. As we have all learned getting someone's number does not always equate to interest, but getting a call from a girl who you had given your number to would most likely lessen the pontential flaking. While it doesn't mean she would definitely call, at least the odds are 50-50. Much better than O. Given the choice, sure the ideal situation is to ask her out and get the number. I wonder though, how often do women GET a number from a guy they have shown interest in? As long as you don't run away after giving it to her:lmao:, wouldn't that show confidence as well. Maybe even more than asking for her number?

[reservoirdog1]

He noticed that she was looking bored in the guy's company - so as he walked past their table to go to the bar, he slipped her a note saying "be sure and invite me to the wedding" with his number on it. She called him the next day.

Your brother's friend is my new personal hero.

 

I think the key to this approach is for the guy to seem interested, but also confident and self assured. And, to not linger after he's given his phone number.

 

Anybody remember the first ten minutes of "Dr. No", the first Bond flick? He's playing baccarat and a hot brunette is across the table from him, and while playing they say about ten words to each other. They both get up to leave at the same time. He asks, "so what else do you do, and where?" She mentions golf. He suggests they play sometime, and have dinner afterwards. She indicates "maybe". He answers, "splendid. My number's on the card." Hands it to her, walks away with a smile but no goodbye. Next time he sees her, she's let himself into his apartment and is wearing nothing but heels and one of his shirts.

 

Of course it's only a movie, but that sounds like a GREAT approach...

[alphamale]

He has my number, and I have his, and I might call him again now im feeling better!!! and this thread reminded me!!!

if it took this thread to remind you about him then whats the point?

 

Never ask for a girls number....i wouldnt have given this guy mine, had he asked...It was nice to be given his though. And by sending him a txt, he got my number too;)

him giving you his # didn't get him very far either...

[Trialbyfire]

I don't trust random meetings with strangers. If there's no way to verify through friends/acquaintances or some public form of verification, who he is, I won't date him.

 

People can be such self-entitled smucks about whether they're in a committed relationship or not.

[ipetree]

I don't trust random meetings with strangers. If there's no way to verify through friends/acquaintances or some public form of verification, who he is, I won't date him.

 

People can be such self-entitled smucks about whether they're in a committed relationship or not.

 

This is very odd in my opinion. So you can only date people at work, or a friend of a friend? Weren't you all exicted about dating that neighbor who was a player?

[Trialbyfire]

This is very odd in my opinion. So you can only date people at work, or a friend of a friend? Weren't you all exicted about dating that neighbor who was a player?

Are you talking about the actor? If so, I googled him like mad, then verified his status through my cuz, who's in the business. If the information came back negative, the first date wouldn't have happened. As it turned out, he wanted an LTR, not me, so maybe I was the player in this situ...

[ipetree]

Not that it matters, but what type of negative info could have came back from a Google search? Or a cousin that barely knows him?

 

Anyway, I wonder if more women are this afraid of strangers as well. I guess not, considering how many online date, and how many I met in public, but who knows.

 

But since you have that fear, what is it? That he might be married? A murderer? Leads a dual life? A Google search will come back with married murderer? I guess to really know the guy you would have to consult with his ex girlfriends prior to accepting a date. I can't see casual friends or acqaintences knowing all about him either, and how he treats women.

[Trialbyfire]

You don't know how to search properly, if you can't find info on someone and potentially negative info. As well, you don't know my cuz who always has her finger on the pulse or can find out, without breaking a sweat. She's something else!

 

If you date strangers blindly, then you deserve what you get. That's why there are so many people who end up as unknowing OWs or end up with bigots.

[ipetree]

You don't know how to search properly, if you can't find info on someone and potentially negative info. As well, you don't know my cuz who always has her finger on the pulse or can find out, without breaking a sweat. She's something else!

 

If you date strangers blindly, then you deserve what you get. That's why there are so many people who end up as unknowing OWs or end up with bigots.

 

I guess I am not that paranoid. Or perhaps I am blessed with excellent intuition, not a gift everyone has. People are much more than the gossip you hear about them, or tidbits you might find about them on the internet.

 

So you will Google a man and it will say he has a girlfriend or a FWB? Interesting.

[SushiX]

I don't trust random meetings with strangers. If there's no way to verify through friends/acquaintances or some public form of verification, who he is, I won't date him.

 

People can be such self-entitled smucks about whether they're in a committed relationship or not.

 

Geez if there was more people like you on this earth, there would be a larger population of singles! You have to verify who he is? Like do background checks and such? My god.

 

I know some women like this. They would never meet strangers at all. They prefer meeting thru friends. Just because your friends know them doesn't mean anything.

[motive2002]

Fleeting moments can be good. Someone you flirt with and feel all googly about for a couple minutes and then you never see them again.

Little experiences like that you can store away like photographs and take a look at in your mind later on.

You never got to know them. Their good habits.. and bad. There was never any conflict to resolve. No issues. Nothing to ruin the fleeting moment and make it out to be more than what it was.

 

Just a nice memory about a stranger you flirted with. A little snapshot to help boost the ego when you need it. Someone smiled and flirted back... and said with their actions and their body language "I like you.. you're cute!"

 

Hold onto that somewhere safe. When you feel down sometime in your life, you have this little thing to look back on.

[Trialbyfire]

Geez if there was more people like you on this earth, there would be a larger population of singles! You have to verify who he is? Like do background checks and such? My god.

Yes, I do background checks. It hasn't slowed down my dating life since I'm not a numbers person. Since my separation, I've only dated or been in STRs with around 8 guys, plus or minus a couple, sometimes a couple of rounds with the same men, in approx. 2 years.

 

I know some women like this. They would never meet strangers at all. They prefer meeting thru friends. Just because your friends know them doesn't mean anything.

Yes, I usually date within my social network, including work contacts. I'm not in a hurry to date or be in a relationship. Been there, done that, it's not a big deal for me right now. My friends are good character judges. If they err, they err on the side of the conservative, which works perfectly for me. Where's there's smoke, there's fire.

 

So, I match my personal take on the guy, with their personal take on the guy. If both are positive, it's a go.

 

If this were a professional judgement, I would handle it solely by facts. Since it's personal, it's my preference.

[Bells]

I find your approach quite funny actually.. and yes... if you were 'game enough' to talk to her like you did.. I don't see why you 'chickened you' on asking her number..

 

You felt quite comfortable with her..

 

LOL....I know...but I think I was a casanova ONLY because the conditions were favorable...the environment was conducive for me to be casanova-ish.

 

I thought it was so funny, she had a BIG ol Turkey Leg (I have no idea of you guys know what I'm talking about when it comes to fair food, some of you are city folk )

 

I'm serious, when I saw her, she had a big, **** eatin' grin on her face and she was holding it like it was a bar of gold or something. ROFL!

 

Honestly she was one of those 5'8" tall women, VERY curvy, buxom...probably had about an extra 20lbs on her (not saying that's a bad thing). Had the "Classique" figure.

 

I thought (Damn, I love a woman with a good appetite) she's not one of those women that just say, "I'll just have a salad" and just eat couple of leaves of lettuce in the salad.

 

And a demeanor of "Jo" from Fact of life (no joke, lol)

 

Very pretty smile (ie - **** eatin' grin)

 

It's just I didn't think I had enough TIME alotted to continue...I needed MORE face time, more TIME to get to know her...but she "had to go"..that's all there was too it....had I been given more time...who knows.

 

I just don't know.

[Bells]

Geez if there was more people like you on this earth, there would be a larger population of singles! You have to verify who he is? Like do background checks and such? My god.

 

I know some women like this. They would never meet strangers at all. They prefer meeting thru friends. Just because your friends know them doesn't mean anything.

 

Heck, my mom met my dad at the beach because they happened to be parked next to each other at the beach.

 

You mean to tell me if you met a guy by the same means (parked next to each other on the beach) you'd refused to even bother with him?

[Trialbyfire]

Heck, my mom met my dad at the beach because they happened to be parked next to each other at the beach.

 

You mean to tell me if you met a guy by the same means (parked next to each other on the beach) you'd refused to even bother with him?

If there was no way to verify him, I wouldn't bother. It's not as if people can't control themselves, if need be. I'm not so arrogant to believe that my judgement on a fleeting meeting with some guy, is enough to want to be alone with him. He could be a whackjob. He could be a bigot.

 

Why be trapped in a date with someone who you find you can't stand to be with?

[Bells]

If there was no way to verify him, I wouldn't bother. It's not as if people can't control themselves, if need be. I'm not so arrogant to believe that my judgement on a fleeting meeting with some guy, is enough to want to be alone with him. He could be a whackjob. He could be a bigot.

 

Why be trapped in a date with someone who you find you can't stand to be with?

 

Can't control themselves? What do you mean?

[Trialbyfire]

Can't control themselves? What do you mean?

No matter how much attraction you feel during an initial meeting, you don't have to bow to it. Better to take a calculated risk, rather than pure risk.

 

Keep in mind that women have to be more careful than men, when dating an unknown, especially when you're someone who's petite, therefore don't have the physical strength to stave off a whackjob. Also, regardless of size, you have to be careful of roofies and date rape scenarios.