shylight200 Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 During the fall semester last year, I had a TA in my physics class that I really liked. He was tall, cute, funny, so nice, in short, I had a huge crush on him. I kinda thought that maybe he liked me, or least there was the potential that he might be interested. It was a relatively small class, maybe 10 students. Often, if he wasn't sitting in the front of the class, he would sit next to me and help me with the problems. He'll actually go through all the steps with me, without really paying attention to the rest of the class. So, I figured this meant, he cared or he thought I was extra stupid. But the semester ended and we all moved on with our lives. I kept hoping that i would run into him on campus sometime but I never did and I got over him and forgot about him. Now, a year later, I was in the student center doing some work last friday when he randomly approached me and we chatted for a few minutes about winter break plans. He wanted to know if I wanted to have lunch with him sometime and we ended up exchanging numbers. But it's been a week and he hasn't called. Which is fine I guess since it's thanksgiving break. But I really thought he liked me, but now I'm not so sure. Maybe I was mistaken. I thought he liked me because he remembered who I was, approached me and sorta made plans in the future sometime. Maybe he approaches all his former students and catches up on their lives when he happens to see them on campus. I don't know. What do you guys think?
Angel1111 Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 It's hard to say for sure but I doubt that he does this with all his former students. It seems to me that he does like you, so I would just give it some time. The holidays tend to be distracting.
Green Posted November 30, 2008 Posted November 30, 2008 its hard to say but you may find this video amusing http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ooxInJq9Ho
Gremio Posted November 30, 2008 Posted November 30, 2008 its hard to say but you may find this video amusing http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ooxInJq9Ho I'm watching the video, four minutes in. I actually said out loud "oh my god"... psycho! Hah.
prettybaby Posted November 30, 2008 Posted November 30, 2008 A guy will never ask for a girl's number and suggest having lunch together unless he's interested in her. I'd give it a bit more time and see what happens.
Author shylight200 Posted November 30, 2008 Author Posted November 30, 2008 its hard to say but you may find this video amusing http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2ooxInJq9Ho I'm watching the video, four minutes in. I actually said out loud "oh my god"... psycho! Hah. LOL! I am nothing like her!
Gremio Posted November 30, 2008 Posted November 30, 2008 LOL! I am nothing like her! I gotta say, I did like the ending. It's just a fun video, but a portrayal of a psycho is just scary! The ending though could very well be true... although not in here case. Hah.
Author shylight200 Posted November 30, 2008 Author Posted November 30, 2008 I gotta say, I did like the ending. It's just a fun video, but a portrayal of a psycho is just scary! The ending though could very well be true... although not in here case. Hah. I know it was slightly scary. I loved when she was brushing her teeth.
Gremio Posted November 30, 2008 Posted November 30, 2008 I know it was slightly scary. I loved when she was brushing her teeth. That's when I lost it! The whole time I'm thinking "too hard! you're ruining your enamel!" LoL (btw I'm not a dentist!)
Perry Posted December 1, 2008 Posted December 1, 2008 You can't call him? Tell him that you are goig over to ____ sometime this week, and ask if he would like to tag along. If he says he can't, there's your answer.
Author shylight200 Posted December 2, 2008 Author Posted December 2, 2008 You can't call him? Tell him that you are goig over to ____ sometime this week, and ask if he would like to tag along. If he says he can't, there's your answer. I guess I could call him...but honestly though, the thought of calling him scares me to death.... I don't know....I think he should call since he's the one that kinda initiated this. Besides, he doesn't seem like the type that's too nervous to call a girl...
Angel1111 Posted December 2, 2008 Posted December 2, 2008 I think he should call since he's the one that kinda initiated this. Besides, he doesn't seem like the type that's too nervous to call a girl... You're absolutely right. Don't call him.
kashmir Posted December 2, 2008 Posted December 2, 2008 Eh, this could be anything. There have been times where I got a girl's number and then decided not to call. Whenever I did call, though, I never waited more than a few days.
Author shylight200 Posted December 2, 2008 Author Posted December 2, 2008 You're absolutely right. Don't call him. Yeah, I'm not going to call. I think I'm just going to move on since it's been a little over a week now.
Author shylight200 Posted December 2, 2008 Author Posted December 2, 2008 Eh, this could be anything. There have been times where I got a girl's number and then decided not to call. Whenever I did call, though, I never waited more than a few days. I can't stand when guys ask for my number but never call. It's like, why would you even bother asking me if you have no intention of actually calling? I don't know, it's happened before and probably will happen again... but still, it sucks! I was so excited in the beginning, kinda anxious and paranoid I accidentally gave him the wrong number a few days in, and now I just don't care anymore...Well actually...no, that's a lie, I do care but still....
kashmir Posted December 2, 2008 Posted December 2, 2008 I can't stand when guys ask for my number but never call. It's like, why would you even bother asking me if you have no intention of actually calling? I don't know, it's happened before and probably will happen again... but still, it sucks! I was so excited in the beginning, kinda anxious and paranoid I accidentally gave him the wrong number a few days in, and now I just don't care anymore...Well actually...no, that's a lie, I do care but still.... But you see, I don't know that. When a girl gives me her number, I assume she gave her number out to at least 2 or 3 other guys that same day or night. I assume that after she met me, no matter how interesting I might have been, that she'll forget me. I even assume in that time between when I got the number and when I may eventually call, she's busy going out with several other guys. I would NEVER think that a girl would seriously look at her phone and wish for me to call. Thus, her number becomes of very little value to me, and sometimes I might totally forget about her.
Author shylight200 Posted December 2, 2008 Author Posted December 2, 2008 But you see, I don't know that. When a girl gives me her number, I assume she gave her number out to at least 2 or 3 other guys that same day or night. I assume that after she met me, no matter how interesting I might have been, that she'll forget me. I even assume in that time between when I got the number and when I may eventually call, she's busy going out with several other guys. I would NEVER think that a girl would seriously look at her phone and wish for me to call. Thus, her number becomes of very little value to me, and sometimes I might totally forget about her. That doesn't make any sense to me at all. I wouldn't have given him my number if I didn't want him to call. I would have said I was busy or made up some excuse not to. So...If you're going to assume the worst about the girl then why ask in the first place? I mean, why would you go through all the trouble of striking up a conversation with her if it's all for nothing? That seems like such a waste of time and energy to me. But what you're saying is that he won't call right?
berrieh Posted December 2, 2008 Posted December 2, 2008 But you see, I don't know that. When a girl gives me her number, I assume she gave her number out to at least 2 or 3 other guys that same day or night. I assume that after she met me, no matter how interesting I might have been, that she'll forget me. I even assume in that time between when I got the number and when I may eventually call, she's busy going out with several other guys. I would NEVER think that a girl would seriously look at her phone and wish for me to call. Thus, her number becomes of very little value to me, and sometimes I might totally forget about her. You know what they say: When you assume (...you know the rest) I don't understand this attitude at all. Personally, I rarely give out my number. I would only give it out to someone I wanted to call. I don't assume a guy asks for everybody's number just because he asks for mine. I feel kind of offended whenever guys go into this mode with anything (giving out numbers, sex, etc) about a gal's actions; where does the theory that just because a girl did something in once case mean she does it always? You are essentially then taking yourself out of the equation and saying you have no individual value that could have prompted such an action. That sounds sad. At any rate, I've never experienced the "Can I get your number?" and not calling phenomenon. *knocks on wood* Every guy I've given the digits to has at least called. During this hectic time, I think it's reasonable to give someone a little extra time. But I don't feel like this guy is gonna call, for whatever reason.
Angel1111 Posted December 2, 2008 Posted December 2, 2008 You know what they say: When you assume (...you know the rest) I don't understand this attitude at all. Personally, I rarely give out my number. I would only give it out to someone I wanted to call. I don't assume a guy asks for everybody's number just because he asks for mine. I feel kind of offended whenever guys go into this mode with anything (giving out numbers, sex, etc) about a gal's actions; where does the theory that just because a girl did something in once case mean she does it always? You are essentially then taking yourself out of the equation and saying you have no individual value that could have prompted such an action. That sounds sad. At any rate, I've never experienced the "Can I get your number?" and not calling phenomenon. *knocks on wood* Every guy I've given the digits to has at least called. During this hectic time, I think it's reasonable to give someone a little extra time. But I don't feel like this guy is gonna call, for whatever reason. I totally agree with you on this. I'm very cautious about who I give my number to and for a guy to assume that I give it out to everyone who asks, and thinks I do that several times a day, is nuts. I've never known a guy who thought like that. But I've never had a guy not call me after asking for my number, either, so maybe I've been lucky. But if a guy thinks that a girl just forgets about it after she gives out her number, he's mistaken.
kashmir Posted December 2, 2008 Posted December 2, 2008 I guess girls give out their numbers much more often at my age. It seems like everybody has everyone else's number, so a girl giving a guy a number isn't saying, "I want you to call me," it's saying, "We can exchange contacts and expand our contact list, in case we ever happen to need one another." I don't have many contacts...maybe 30 or 40, so adding someone I meet means that I like them, but in general I find that not to be the case with girls. Getting a number from a girl is NOT a sign that she likes you. She could like you, but she could also not care for you and is just giving you her number to get rid of you for the time being, intending not to pick up when you do call. I can't tell you how many times I met a girl, thought I was getting some good signs from her, got her number, and then called or texted, only for her never to answer. Based on these experiences, I assumed that those girls either were purposely leading me on for an ego boost or else they liked me for a day and then got picked up by several other guys and totally forgot me...usually the latter. When an event happens more frequently, it becomes easier to assume and predict how a future event will turn out.
Gremio Posted December 2, 2008 Posted December 2, 2008 After finding this forum only recently, I've realized even moreso how different everyone is. berrieh, I agree with you and disagree. I rarely ask for a woman's number. It isn't because of lack of courage or being shy, it's because I am not afraid to be single, and am very picky when it comes to being with someone. Now when it comes to a woman being permiscuous on a first date, it's hard not to feel that it's a possibility she is like that with other men. Quite frankly, it would be a concern to me and honestly a turn off.
berrieh Posted December 2, 2008 Posted December 2, 2008 Getting a number from a girl is NOT a sign that she likes you. She could like you, but she could also not care for you and is just giving you her number to get rid of you for the time being, intending not to pick up when you do call. I can't tell you how many times I met a girl, thought I was getting some good signs from her, got her number, and then called or texted, only for her never to answer. Based on these experiences, I assumed that those girls either were purposely leading me on for an ego boost or else they liked me for a day and then got picked up by several other guys and totally forgot me...usually the latter. When an event happens more frequently, it becomes easier to assume and predict how a future event will turn out. It wasn't that long ago I was in college, and I didn't give out my number so much. But maybe it's a new generation thing. I dunno. Or just the wrong sorts of girls. They never answer? Do you wait a long time to call? Most guys I give my number to call within 24 hours. The only guys I've not really called back are the ones who took too long to call. That doesn't bode well for what I seek in a mate--open communication.
kashmir Posted December 2, 2008 Posted December 2, 2008 It wasn't that long ago I was in college, and I didn't give out my number so much. But maybe it's a new generation thing. I dunno. Or just the wrong sorts of girls. They never answer? Do you wait a long time to call? Most guys I give my number to call within 24 hours. The only guys I've not really called back are the ones who took too long to call. That doesn't bode well for what I seek in a mate--open communication. Let's see, in the vast majority of those cases, I called within 48 hours I'd say. I don't want to hijack this thread anymore on this topic. I was thinking about making a new thread addressing some other things, so I'll add this whole calling thing to it.
Author shylight200 Posted December 3, 2008 Author Posted December 3, 2008 I know I really need to just let this go and move on but i don't know, i just can't. It's stupid...i know.... But....do you guys think I should text him or something? Or would that seem too desperate and needy? My only concern if I text him is that he'll respond with "who are you", that'll be really embarrassing. But I mean, even if we don't date, we could still be friends right?
zhsoj Posted December 3, 2008 Posted December 3, 2008 He won't respond with "who are you"... He picked you out of a crowd, he'll remember. I say go for it. Try to take the initiative here and grab what you want. I could see a couple problems he would be having... He's a TA so he probably is going for an advanced degree in Physics, right? He could just have a lot of work, family plans, etc... Plus there is the professional/student relationship... He may be thinking about being a physics professor and could worry that being in a relationship with a student now could be harmful later... Etc... Whole bunch of things... Best bet is to keep it simple, grab life by the horns, and give it a shot. At the very least things should be clearer in the end.
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