californiadreaming Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 Okay so wow, The truth has settled in. I will not lie, I gave in. I went and hand delivered a piece of mail to her yesterday. I dropped it in her car and text her to go out and get it. She went out and got it and text me back that she did just that. I felt that if she did not know that I understood the change that needed to make I would never have a shot at love again. She text me this morning asking for some information she left in my car. Well when I sent the information over I sent a lengthy letter along with the information in the e-mail. For the past week I have pumped myself up to think that she was gonna come back. The problem that bothered me was that I had no clue to when this was going to take place. With that said I only let her breath entirely one day since the break up Monday. Well, my feelings got the best of me this afternoon and I called her. She was really mean to me, and made it clear that she did not want to speak to me. She keep repeating that I was making things worst. She even stated your making me not want to like you by calling and crying. She also said I have been by a man for too long. Now that is the part that I did not mention, prior to me she was with a guy from the age of 15 years old until the age of 20 sh was single for one year 20 to 21, and then she got with me for 5 years. So that statement mad sense, especially with her 6 months from graduating hair school. She probably wants to be free for a bit and I at the same time need to build myself up to not have to depend on a woman. I am 27 damn near 28 for God sake. My mother pulled up and saw me crying(Yes I am a total loser, I live in my parents garage) and called her.. I had no clue until my mom walked in and said that she said that she love's me, she is very much in love with me, she even said that I still have a chance at her, but contacting her, her co-workers, and crossing those lines is redic! So like you all will tell me and like I know, and as my mother said. Go NC, and leave the dang girl alone. I know, I know. I really now know whether its with her or not I need to study how to love myself, and treat a woman. And I will try my hardiest to wait for her but not say no to any other possibilities either. Right now it's all about me. And I think that if she was to come back now it would be horrible because I'd be the same loser with no job and trying to make it. Let me get stable and on my own and then approach her for a date. Sound like a plan? lol, I feel some what better now. The other good thing is she said she doesn't want to be with me or anyone else for that matter, she just want's to be free to breath. So regardless of anything this was bound to happen. She needs to go have fun in the world and when she is ready maybe we will be. Until then, Thank you guys and I will post the haps on my love life as time goes on. Gonna go work out, ugh if anyone of you in Los Angeles County, or Sand Diego county have any work let me know I am up for a relocation. I'm 27 and ready to live life.
EmperorR Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 Don't wait for her move on, if she loved you she would be with you right now. ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS, my ex cheated on me dumped me and still told me she loved me:rolleyes:, its all a croak of sh*t. Trust me go NC COLD NC, TOTAL NC, in a couple of months you'll feel a little better, once you let go you will find someone better who won't kick you to the curb. And sorry to tell you that whole free ish is a joke, I notice it alot in girls like 19-21 wanting to test the field the waters, I gurantee you she will be with a new "friend" shortly. It's best ot go total NC so you won't hurt yourself knowing what's going on it her life.
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