allanDR Posted November 27, 2008 Posted November 27, 2008 As I was sitting around with my family, eating too much and feeling good I had the urge to send an email to my ex wishing her a good holiday. There wasn't some hidden agenda to it, it just seemed like the right thing to do. I wonder if anyone else ever feels this way? I don't want to become friends again but it seemed like a good thing to do. Now I'm sitting here over analyzing and wishing it was more simple than this. It's really hard because my first instinct was what could possibly be the harm? I've been happy lately and moving on pretty well, then I had to go think about all the horrible things she did. I wish she hadn't been such a horrible person, not because they hurt at the time, but because I still remember how horrible she was and that she doesn't even deserve any attention from me. I wish it was just neutral.
northstar1 Posted November 27, 2008 Posted November 27, 2008 As I was sitting around with my family, eating too much and feeling good I had the urge to send an email to my ex wishing her a good holiday. There wasn't some hidden agenda to it, it just seemed like the right thing to do. I wonder if anyone else ever feels this way? I don't want to become friends again but it seemed like a good thing to do. Now I'm sitting here over analyzing and wishing it was more simple than this. It's really hard because my first instinct was what could possibly be the harm? I've been happy lately and moving on pretty well, then I had to go think about all the horrible things she did. I wish she hadn't been such a horrible person, not because they hurt at the time, but because I still remember how horrible she was and that she doesn't even deserve any attention from me. I wish it was just neutral. I think lots of us feel this way over the holidays. Just ask yourself this, if you send it, will you care about a reply? If she does or doesn't, will it bother you waiting? If you can tell yourself, you are just doing it to be nice and don't care about a reply, then it would seem okay. The prob for most is that they will wait on a reply, and if they don't get one, or it's a very neutral one, it will set them back.
Author allanDR Posted November 27, 2008 Author Posted November 27, 2008 She'll most likely send a neutral response back. I don't think it will "set me back" at all. In fact I'd much rather get a neutral or no response at all than a long one asking me what I'm doing with my life or whatever. However I feel like if I even have to ask myself whether it's a good idea or not, it's probably not. Then again, better to regret something you did than something you didn't do. Ahhhh.
northstar1 Posted November 27, 2008 Posted November 27, 2008 She'll most likely send a neutral response back. I don't think it will "set me back" at all. In fact I'd much rather get a neutral or no response at all than a long one asking me what I'm doing with my life or whatever. However I feel like if I even have to ask myself whether it's a good idea or not, it's probably not. Then again, better to regret something you did than something you didn't do. Ahhhh. Yes, definitely. Life is too short to have regrets.
OCCDAVE Posted November 28, 2008 Posted November 28, 2008 I'm also pacing back and forth wondering if i should contact my ex of 2 and half years who broke up with me recently.I have now gone a full week without contact and i was sorta thinking she would have sent a text saying happy thanksgiving so far nothing.
Author allanDR Posted November 28, 2008 Author Posted November 28, 2008 Well I sent it. I don't know whether it was a mistake.
Sysyphus28 Posted November 28, 2008 Posted November 28, 2008 Same siutation! Thinkning about sending a letter or email or text, Instead I called my family and I paid attention to the people who care about me NOW. Not some past bulls***. Because it is hard to believe and it feels gut wrenching to say, but it is the past. My ex did not reach out to me on the holiday and I did not reach out to her. I am NOT thankful for the awful way she has treated me. She is one of the most selfish a**holes I have ever met.
Teuen101 Posted November 28, 2008 Posted November 28, 2008 I was feeling in the dumps too- no way I would send my ex a e-mail at this point of NC- she took a huge crap on me- for along time I sat around and cried for her- begged to be forgave for crap she started- I took all the blame crawled like a wurm ! They dont care about you! remember that if they did they would be with you- gonna link a song - not sure it will work - but hear it out! - hope it cheers you up and can help you stay strong ... to hell with them ! http://search.playlist.com/tracks/headstrong
EmperorR Posted November 28, 2008 Posted November 28, 2008 I didn't and I won't for christmas, she's the one who kicked me to the curb, if she text me merry christmas, I'll text back the same and that's it. But I'm not going out of my way breaking NC for someone who doesn't care about me
UnamedSeven Posted November 28, 2008 Posted November 28, 2008 I wonder if anyone else ever feels this way? I actually have a text message saved wishing my ex a "Merry Christmas" ..Probably should delete it. Its really not worth it. Like it or not, this could, accidentally, resurrect the past between you and her (or you and him).
trex Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 I think you just answered your own question... I wish she hadn't been such a horrible person, not because they hurt at the time, but because I still remember how horrible she was and that she doesn't even deserve any attention from me. Let it go. If you've moved on and are doing a lot better, what good is that email going to do for you?
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