jur z girl Posted November 27, 2008 Posted November 27, 2008 ok. here goes... i've been seeing this guy for about 2 months, well actually, we've been having sex for about 2 months. when we started messing around neither one of us was in a relationship and we each had our own reasons for not wanting one. we decided we would just do our thing and thats it. Now i'm afraid i'm liking him in a more than sexual way and would really like to get to know him better and possibly become more. I'm afraid if i say something he won't want to see me anymore but on the same note i feel like i shouldn't have to settle, and that maybe my reasons for wanting this were wrong. It's the first time I've been in this situation. I mean how do i know he even likes me, i know he likes ******* me but how do i know if he thinks about me other than for that. Do you think there's any chance?
BikerBeagle Posted November 27, 2008 Posted November 27, 2008 You could always ask him ...? Now that you have feelings for him beyond just the sex, the FWB arrangement is going to be a road filled with heartache and frustration for you.
berrieh Posted November 27, 2008 Posted November 27, 2008 I'm afraid if i say something he won't want to see me anymore but on the same note i feel like i shouldn't have to settle, and that maybe my reasons for wanting this were wrong. It's the first time I've been in this situation. I mean how do i know he even likes me, i know he likes ******* me but how do i know if he thinks about me other than for that. Do you think there's any chance? Really, the odds are against you. If you've already talked about not wanting a relationship, and he didn't want one either, then, there you go. Do you do anything other than hook up? Do you date at all? You should probably extract yourself from the situation if you don't feel the same way that you did, possibly telling him that you feel your developing feelings and you should bounce, because you know that wasn't the deal. That gives him space to react to it if he is into you, but, yes, it means you'll probably lose him.
prettybaby Posted November 27, 2008 Posted November 27, 2008 I always wonder how those type of strictly sexual relationships function. Like, do you guys not talk about intimate stuff at all, such as feelings? I find it strange you'd have the closest physical connection possible, and yet not talk about personal stuff like that. I'd try to talk to him. Or at least try to change the dynamics of your relationship. Get him to do stuff with you, other than, you know. Maybe try to slowly shift it to a more "traditional" relationship. Although I have zero experience with such relationships; so I'm not sure whether you could realistically achieve that without discussing it all openly with him.
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