Woggle Posted November 28, 2008 Posted November 28, 2008 Just do the things that you enjoy and you are bound to find women enjoying these same things. If you keep trying to find women in clubs or meat market type of envitroments you will strike out as well. I can't stand runwaway capitalism either and I am an expert at living very well on a small budget and I found somebody who is the same way so you just need to look in the right place. The key to finding a good mate is looking the right places and if you don't want a materialistic woman stay away from places where they gather.
kashmir Posted November 28, 2008 Posted November 28, 2008 Yup, our grandparents, hands down the greatest generation ever. You forgot to mention two things: in addition to the depression, they 1) also fought two wars AND 2) although they were dirt-poor, they still looked MUCH BETTER and CLASSIER than the contemporary slobs plauqing the streets everywhere; Look at any depression-era picture. Both are very true, though every generation has a major war that defines it. Our fathers were in Vietnam, grandfathers in WWII, and their fathers in WWI. Still, I believe that even thousands of years from now, when people will have invented totally insane new ways to kill their fellow man, historians will look back and call WWII a major turning point in humanity. Our grandparents were part of that major turning point and the greatest depression this country has ever seen.
cutegirl Posted November 28, 2008 Posted November 28, 2008 I think when many women realize that after college, or even an advanced degree, all of these things are not easily attainable, they look for men who can provide them. If they do not meet a man that can, or will, they continue looking. So, men get stuck into the world of materialism. They learn quickly that to get the slender attractive woman not necessarily cash, but "things" attract women. A nice condo, nice home, fancy car, nice clothes, etc. Granted, this man might be paycheck to paycheck, but he gives the impression of having what women want. He might be less better looking, dumber, less scrupulous, but overall his things speak louder than whom he is himself. Hahahaha I don't even want to get married ever, I am fine being single forever. I have made more than all of my exes. Not only do I pay for my own luxuries and bills (and my mother's bills), I used to pay some bills for my EX BF's as well. They never gave me one cent. I do not jack crap from any man. I don't like a guy being the breadwinner, I actually prefer to make more. And I pay in cash for everything too, not credit cards... If I want a purse that's over 1k I pay cash. 100 percent my money. Don't even insult me by thinking I need a man to pay for me, I wouldn't even accept a free meal at McDonalds from a man, I pay my own way in life, I don't need anything from anyone.
Trialbyfire Posted November 28, 2008 Posted November 28, 2008 I really think people need to read up about the Great Depression and the Great Compression, before they idealize other generations. Equivalency of "stuff", has much to do with how much the products were worth back in the "golden ages" v. what it costs to have the "stuff" we have now. If a factory is cranking out millions of washers and dryers, the cost is exponentially lower than if the factory is hand assembling 500 washers and dryers per year. If you're still in college or university, check out the aggie chicks. They're more salt of the earth types.
ipetree Posted November 28, 2008 Posted November 28, 2008 Hahahaha I don't even want to get married ever, I am fine being single forever. I have made more than all of my exes. Not only do I pay for my own luxuries and bills (and my mother's bills), I used to pay some bills for my EX BF's as well. They never gave me one cent. I do not jack crap from any man. I don't like a guy being the breadwinner, I actually prefer to make more. And I pay in cash for everything too, not credit cards... If I want a purse that's over 1k I pay cash. 100 percent my money. Don't even insult me by thinking I need a man to pay for me, I wouldn't even accept a free meal at McDonalds from a man, I pay my own way in life, I don't need anything from anyone. Cutegirl, I never said all women. But obviously you are the exception, and not the rule. I suppose I could say "men like sex" and some guy might post saying he does not like sex. What's the point?
Author wisebutnotperfect Posted November 28, 2008 Author Posted November 28, 2008 thx for the knowledge that there is at least one woman out there who sees through all of the crap that we are shovel fed since birth in this society. i will admit that up until about 10 years ago i was also not aware of the control that advertising/peer pressure had over my mind. i think the awakening came when i began to read more. asian spirituality, buddhism etc. take care.. lynn
Author wisebutnotperfect Posted November 28, 2008 Author Posted November 28, 2008 i think most of my problem is just being in the right environment.. staying out of the bars is probably key
movingonandon Posted November 28, 2008 Posted November 28, 2008 i think most of my problem is just being in the right environment.. staying out of the bars is probably key absolutely, it is just hard to resist all the very, very skimpily dressed chicks on the inside. I guess the mall mentality in action, none of us are completely immune also, to be fair, there are bars and bars... to my complete shock, it is not completely impossible to meet decent women in bars, but it needs to be the right kind of bar. college bars and yuppie hangouts are not it ; which rules 70% of the bars, but still
Author wisebutnotperfect Posted November 28, 2008 Author Posted November 28, 2008 thx for all of the valuable feedback.. seems like the topic definitely strikes a nerve with many of us.
radigal Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 You need to spend more time hanging out with anarchists. There are lots of us, we're everywhere, and most of us are nice. Check your local indymedia for info on where to find us.
kashmir Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 You need to spend more time hanging out with anarchists. There are lots of us, we're everywhere, and most of us are nice. Check your local indymedia for info on where to find us. But how many women are anarchists or at the very least anti-capitalist/anti-materialist? From my experiences, men seem to embrace that kind of ideology a lot more. Not that the point of radical political and social criticism is to meet women...but since you brought it up I figured point that out.
Posco_Proudfoot Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 in the last ten years i have found myself awakened to the fact that i am disinterested in most of the capitalistic/materialistic/consumer driven concepts that seem to drive our society and western world in general. problem is i am single and have a hard time relating to women who seem obsessed with shopping, consumerism, large beautiful homes and money driven lifestyles. how am i going to find someone with similar values in todays world? i feel lost in this landscape that tells us that more is always better! where in the world will i find anyone who has awakened to the fact that we are led like lemmings by advertising and consumerism? help! My recent relationship was filled with materialistic concepts. It was something I absolutely could barely handle. The whole argument over money, as in I'm not made of, she end it, she moves out, and now she is broke.
MN randomguy Posted November 29, 2008 Posted November 29, 2008 This is only a problem when it turns into obsession. For me, the hippie 'back to basics' crap is as anoying and disgusting as the "can't miss a sale" crap, it's all about balance. True dat, There's less balanced people in the last few years it seems like. Or, I need to live in a less trendy neighborhood. OP, would you be down with a hairy arm pitted hippie girl? There's lots of those. All you have to do is have weed/learn how to play acoustic guitar. I wish I could stand talking to them, the vegetarians seem to put on less weight.
radigal Posted December 1, 2008 Posted December 1, 2008 But how many women are anarchists or at the very least anti-capitalist/anti-materialist? From my experiences, men seem to embrace that kind of ideology a lot more. Not that the point of radical political and social criticism is to meet women...but since you brought it up I figured point that out. Many thousands. I'm one of them!
Gold Pile Posted December 1, 2008 Posted December 1, 2008 For some reason many people blame the West for Capitalism. Pretty much the entire civilized world functions on Capitalism and always has. Even ancient Eastern brutal, dictatorial Monarchies had Capitalist monetary systems. I'm not into conspicuous consumption either, but the things I do buy...food, routine clothing, condoms, and medical care etc are available to us via Capitalism. I'm not a farmer as it's too hard, I'm not a hunter as it's too bloody. That's why money exists.
Trialbyfire Posted December 1, 2008 Posted December 1, 2008 i feel lost in this landscape that tells us that more is always better! where in the world will i find anyone who has awakened to the fact that we are led like lemmings by advertising and consumerism? help! I have to ask you something. How do you live your life? Do you live way below your means by growing your own vegetables, baking your own bread, always making dinner at home in your fireplace? Or do you own an Xbox, TV, iPod and cell phone?
johan Posted December 1, 2008 Posted December 1, 2008 Why are you always attacking the XBox?? What did the XBox ever do to you?
Trialbyfire Posted December 1, 2008 Posted December 1, 2008 Xboxes are horrible things. Wiis are right for me. It's okay for you to own an Xbox but my preference is for the Wii. Just don't push your Xbox onto me, capitalist!
CandyGirlXO Posted December 1, 2008 Posted December 1, 2008 Maybe it is where you live, because myself and MOST of my friends are not big into the name brand handbags and shopping etc.. I grew up poor, so maybe that is why I am not into all the expensive things. I would like a house one day, but nothing too expensive, hell I would be happy with a simple condo. I like clothes but cheap things, and I do not shop all that much. Having nice cars etc.. do not impress me at all. Maybe because my ex was well off and I saw that money does not make you happy, I can do without it. I mean I need money to survive, but it doesn't take much to make me happy. So not ALL women are materialistic, and they are easy to point out.
jerbear Posted December 1, 2008 Posted December 1, 2008 Xboxes are horrible things. Wiis are right for me. It's okay for you to own an Xbox but my preference is for the Wii. Just don't push your Xbox onto me, capitalist! :lmao: I'm bummed Anne Taylor's going under. She was one of my favorites. Last I checked they are not going under.
wierdmunky Posted December 1, 2008 Posted December 1, 2008 Can I just say that my ex boyfriend was way more materialistic than I?
Ruby Slippers Posted December 1, 2008 Posted December 1, 2008 ^ Mine was, too. He came from a pretty well-off family, was into all the latest gadgets, and spent way more money on me for holidays and birthdays than I could afford to spend on him. He seemed to like that I wasn't materialistic, though, so it worked out OK.
jerbear Posted December 1, 2008 Posted December 1, 2008 This was my awakening... college courses in: Risk, Insurance, Finance, Business Law, Entrepreneurship, Derivatives, Fixed Income, and others that I realized that it is better to be conservative on income, have a storm fund (rainy day) and take some calculated risks. Also not living beyond one's means (paycheck to paycheck) and quit buying crap I wanted but didn't need. If one never wrote a business plan or campaign plans, try it and it would be an awakening for many.
kashmir Posted December 2, 2008 Posted December 2, 2008 There needs to be a balance. There's nothing wrong with having value for some material possessions. I spend a lot of money on music equipment, fancy guitars, etc., because that's what I like...and yes, part of me does it just because I want to have it. This is where the line needs to be drawn, I think: Credit. A lot of people might seem well off because they have some fancy job and car, have a stylish apartment in the city, and spend money on clothes, partying, and luxuries here and there. The fact is though, they're probably drowning in credit bills. Credit isn't a bad thing in itself, but it can be a disaster when you don't keep a steady track of your income and expenses, and a lot of people just go out and think they can get anything with a piece of plastic and don't keep track of anything they're buying. Right now I'm exercising the philosophy that if I don't have the cash in my hand or in the bank, then I can't buy something. We'll see how many years that lasts.
Angel1111 Posted December 2, 2008 Posted December 2, 2008 There are people out there who see the advertising world for what it is. You would do well to go through Dave Ramsey's financial classes, or buy his CD's, because it'll give you a better rounded attitude about money. You would like Dave because he tells it like it is with the marketing world, but he also understands the necessity of money. The truth is, you need money and it's great to have a bunch of it for security purposes - to enhance you and your family's life, to help others, send your kids to whatever college they want to go to, travel, etc. It all takes money. And the truth is, women are designed to be geared toward security, which is why they're so attracted to rich men. But the problem isn't money, it's really the attitude about having it now when a person really can't afford it. It's the attitude of choosing to be in debt vs. saving up for things. You don't really need to find a woman who's a minimalist - unless that's what you want - but you need to find one who has a grip on reality and has financial security as the higher priority over shopping and getting everything she wants. If she likes to shop and the two of you can afford it, it doesn't mean you have to understand that or go with her.
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