Ccarey Posted November 25, 2008 Posted November 25, 2008 I started an emotional affair with this man. He lives 1500 miles away. I have posted about this before. I just can't stop it. I am getting tired of the relationship though because he lives so far away and we never see each other. I am really sexually attracted to him and we have great sexual chemistry on the phone. I am bummed though and getting sad because I feel we will never consumate the affair. I am married but my husband wont have sex with me for a year and a half. I am just torn up about om because he is so boring on the phone and sometimes emotionally unavailable. We made plans to see each other and he said he got busy at the last minute with work. I was really disappointed but let it go because maybe we are suppose to see each other. He asked me if " I was looking to fall in love." And would I consider moving to where he lives. I have been reading this site and it helps. It does feel like I am in a sexual addiction thing with this other man. We text each other and let each other know we are thinking of each other but it is getting so damn tiresome not seeing him
lkjh Posted November 25, 2008 Posted November 25, 2008 Why don't you first seek MC with your H or have him see a doctor about his lack of interest in sex? If this doesn't work why don't you divorce your H and then look for something else? Getting into an affair will make everything 100 times worse
jwi71 Posted November 25, 2008 Posted November 25, 2008 If you want out of the M then do so. No one will blame you. No one will think less of you. Its ok. If you want to drag your H to MC then do so. People will admire you for fighting for your M. And if it still fails, no one will blame you. No one will think less of you. If you cheat, you will be a pariah. Period. Don't believe me? Then you just continue walking down this path. It leads straight to disaster. And everyone will blame you. Promise me one thing though - try not to be too surprised when you knock on his door and his wife answers. Or his mommy answers and it turns out he is 14. Because you know nothing about him. Only what he chooses to reveal. Online. Or in a text message. All the while denying you the non-verbal communication. The body language. Its oh so easy to lie online. So...what do you want? Two choices - stay or go. Which is it?
2sure Posted November 25, 2008 Posted November 25, 2008 To be honest, it sounds like your OM has toyed with you by asking if you were in love?, will you move to be with him? Has he told you he is in love with you - why has he not come to see you? And now he is losing interest. Boring, emotionally unavailable. You have been willing to betray your husband, marriage, children if any - for a virtual friend. Your marriage is in trouble. You are open to an affair, any kind. Why not make an effort towards repairing your marriage, then make a decision? Regardless of your current feelings for your H, this is his life.
LucreziaBorgia Posted November 25, 2008 Posted November 25, 2008 What are your H's reasons for not having sex with you? Is there more than 'no sex drive'?
Author Ccarey Posted December 4, 2008 Author Posted December 4, 2008 Thanks. I have known this guy for two years...he is a friend of the family. He is unavailable and a real avoidance addict. I think it is just an ego boost that I like him and I am doing a lot better. Never saw him when i had the chance and now he is a little distant. Oh well. You're right. He has never made any actual moves to see me and it sucks. But, time to move on. Thanks for your feedback. This escape was a complete waste of time.
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