prettybaby Posted November 24, 2008 Posted November 24, 2008 So I did it. I called him, we're meeting up on Wednesday around lunch time, and right now I have this WTF feeling. Like, "why did I just do this?" "why do I do this to myself?" I almost feel like backing out, but I won't because that would suck and I'm not a quitter. I just have this bad feeling now. Is this normal? I should be crazy excited right now but I'm feeling bad! wtf The phone conversation technically went okay I guess, although something felt a bit off and I can't quite put my finger on it. Perhaps it was because I was a bit nervous, he never seems to know how to keep it flowing either. I wonder if he's shy or an ass. I don't even understand why I'm feeling like a mess now. I have mixed feelings and I don't wanna show up like that. Any advise?
amiracle Posted November 24, 2008 Posted November 24, 2008 First- congratulations for having the courage to contact him! You should pat yourself on the back. There is nothing worse than not doing anything and wondering what may have been for the rest of your life. You did it- You made contact. Now breathe deeply-- relax! Its a perfectly normal reaction you are having. It has happened to me before when meeting someone again, after a long period of absence. It is normal to feel awkward when talking to someone under your circumstances. There are a lot of feelings and mental processes going on in each of you now. It is normal to freak out a bit, as well. Just make sure to relax. Deep breathing. Think positively! There is nothing wrong with catching up with someone you liked before- it is normal! Try not to put a negative spin on things now. Be positive, friendly and see what happens. I am in a similar situation now, have gone through similar turmoil, so everything I am saying to you is what I am doing myself. Enjoy life and try not to stress out now. The more you are your positive, vibrant, relaxed self, the more you will enjoy your meeting. When did you call him? Did you freak out before or after your conversation? I freaked out a bit when I felt we were both a bit awkward during our video sessions. I am normally very self confident and relaxed and so is he- but we both seemed not our normal selves. It gets better in the next conversation. PS If you need to talk more you can PM me- I am going through the same thing.
Adamagnet Posted November 24, 2008 Posted November 24, 2008 So I did it. I called him, we're meeting up on Wednesday around lunch time, and right now I have this WTF feeling. Like, "why did I just do this?" "why do I do this to myself?" I almost feel like backing out, but I won't because that would suck and I'm not a quitter. I just have this bad feeling now. Is this normal? I should be crazy excited right now but I'm feeling bad! wtf Why do you think it is unusual to feel a bit anxious before a date?
Author prettybaby Posted November 24, 2008 Author Posted November 24, 2008 Well, I usually feel excited in a positive way before a date. Now it's more like, blehh. It actually feels like when you're about to go for a test and you already know you're gonna fail, you know, that yucky feeling where you just wanna get it over with and then run back home and take a hot bath and swallow a ton of ice cream while watching TV in your bed. Yeah, that kinda feeling. Heck, it's not even really a date. It's more like, we're meeting up and he didn't help me out at all.
amiracle Posted November 24, 2008 Posted November 24, 2008 I know the feeling. However, think of it as a nice get together with someone you like. He obviously wants to meet with you- he called you! Just think of it as a getting to know someone. A coffee date! There is nothing bad about meeting someone for coffee and getting to know them better- right? You just need to relax and start from scratch. Don't think so much about what he was like years ago. Get to know him now! Big hug to you
Author prettybaby Posted November 24, 2008 Author Posted November 24, 2008 Aw thanks. I guess I just need a good night sleep now and wake up with a fresh mind. At least I still got a day left to get my head straight. Pfft. I suppose I'm mainly disappointed that it wasn't flowing as well as when he first called me a few days ago, and he totally didn't help me out at all. Now he better offer to grab some lunch together when I show up there at noon, or I'll be majorly disappointed.
Adamagnet Posted November 24, 2008 Posted November 24, 2008 Well, I usually feel excited in a positive way before a date. Now it's more like, blehh. It actually feels like when you're about to go for a test and you already know you're gonna fail, you know, that yucky feeling where you just wanna get it over with and then run back home and take a hot bath and swallow a ton of ice cream while watching TV in your bed. Yeah, that kinda feeling. Heck, it's not even really a date. It's more like, we're meeting up and he didn't help me out at all. It sounds like you lost the attraction. I too dislike the conflict between the rational and the emotional mind. You should actually feel proud that your maturity is winning out over selfishness, as lesser people would flake.
Author prettybaby Posted November 24, 2008 Author Posted November 24, 2008 It sounds like you lost the attraction. I too dislike the conflict between the rational and the emotional mind. You should actually feel proud that your maturity is winning out over selfishness, as lesser people would flake. Yeah, I'm glad I did it. However, I think it's too soon to speak of attraction or loss thereof. We haven't seen each other in forever, so we're basically two strangers who happened to know each other at some point. So I don't know. I guess we're both in this "what the hell" phase where we have no idea what's going on on the other side of the line. I've been pretty consistent in my behavior though. I guess I'm mainly puzzled by his awkward moments and it kind of kills it for me.
Adamagnet Posted November 24, 2008 Posted November 24, 2008 Yeah, I'm glad I did it. However, I think it's too soon to speak of attraction or loss thereof. We haven't seen each other in forever, so we're basically two strangers who happened to know each other at some point. Were you attracted to him in the past? So I don't know. I guess we're both in this "what the hell" phase where we have no idea what's going on on the other side of the line. I've been pretty consistent in my behavior though. I guess I'm mainly puzzled by his awkward moments and it kind of kills it for me. I've had a couple of these types of re-introductions where I felt a bit insecure because I recollected our relationship with those nostalgic rose colored glasses. He may be putting you up on a false pedestal and as long as you are down to earth in person, I'm willing to bet that the awkward moments will evaporate.
Author prettybaby Posted November 25, 2008 Author Posted November 25, 2008 ^^ That sounds coherent and realistic. I guess you're right. I should just take it easy and enjoy it. Thanks for the support messages It really helps
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