VERY strange story

[casey001]

Ok this is a very different break up story than usual and possibly people may even laugh at it, but I can assure you it hurts just as much as normal breakups!

 

I had been with my now ex bf for just under a year.

I was bestfriends with him before we got together and we told each other everything.

Things became very very strange is the last 3 or so months, he became very distant and very angry at me all the time for absolutly nothing. I was hurting like hell because of his behaviour but kept trying my best to sort things out. He also never able to 'perform'

He hurt me so bad in those months for no reason, he was so rude and nasty and would say the most hurtful things. Eventually he broke up with me and never once spoke to me again.

 

I went mad trying to work out what happened but I just couldnt.

A few nights ago I was approached by another male, He asked to speak to me.

He told me something that shattered me. That my ex bf was not straight and they had an affair before we got together. He showed me some of the txts my ex had send him and even some of the underwear shots my ex had sent him.

He said nothing physical had happened btwn them but I was still shattered.

 

As soon as my ex met me he shut this guy out of his life in the same way he did to me, was very rude and nasty and refused to talk to him ever again.

 

After uncovering this I feel as I have just lived a lie.

Like I was a cover up.

I feel he freaked out that he was gay or had feelings for another guy and ran to the nearest girl.

When I was with him he was so homophobic and seemed terrified of other guys.

Unfortunatly I fell in love with him and I cant explain how much im hurting.

Everything makes sense now! There were signs but I just ignored them

 

I dont know why but I still love him and miss him so much tho im trying not to. I feel numb. I dont know how to think or feel. Im crying so hard but I feel I have no right to as everything was a lie.

 

My ex has only had gfnds before, and this was his first affair with a guy (to my knowledge)

I know he lied to me, as at the same time he was telling me he was falling for me he was sending underwear shots to other guys.

 

So why on earth do i still miss him and hurt so bad?

I have done nc for two weeks but I want to break it now and tell him that I know.

He doesn't know that I know about his 'male' affair. Infact no one knows, he lied about the whole thing and said the other poor boy was stalking him and made up all these horrible lies about him which I and everyone else bought.

Everyone thinks he is completely straight and an absolute saint. Only me and this guy know what a liar and how nasty he is.

 

So what do I do? Im hurting so bad, but im also so angry over everything. I want to tell him I know, hell I want to post the underwear shots and raunchy txt messages around everywhere!

 

I feel its not right that everyone thinks he a straight saint who wouldnt hurt a soul when its so far from the truth,

I HATE the face that he is laughing in my face since he dumped me and walking round all smug and happy.

If I told him I knew I could wipe that smug smile off his face and take some of the power back.

 

I dont know, any suggestions or help or anything!?

 

Note: When we did get offically together he did cut this guy out and refuse to talk so he didn't cheat on me, but I dont feel he was entirely honest with me either

[stayin' alive]

I am very sorry that you are hurting, but I don't think it will make you feel better to let him know that you know what happened. I seriously doubt he will admit to you what happened even if you say that you saw the pictures, and that will probably make you extremely angry and hurt. He is clearly in denial. Trust me, the old saying that "karma is a b" is really true. Honestly though, I understand why you feel like he is "laughing" at you, but it doesn't matter what he does or how he feels at this point. He is of no consequence. Everything is about you now. All that matters is how you feel. You will grieve this loss and this betrayal, and you will move on. He is a deceitful person who is clearly not in touch with his identity. You are the one that will have the last laugh when you live the best life you can without him.

 

It is only natural to feel hurt. You were in love, and you were betrayed. This is no reflection on you, and I promise you that in time you will heal. Please don't give up on love. There is someone out there that will be honest with themselves and you.