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one night stand? hand-holding?


my body is a cage

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my body is a cage

Do signs of affection the first time you hook up with someone mean that its likely the person would like to hook up again? Or is it just something meaningless done in the heat of the moment?

 

For example, does it mean anything if you hold hands, kiss/cuddle after the hook up, and they tell you you should stop by their place?

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CommitmentPhobe

For me no, I've done the whole you're my temporary girlfriend on a ONS before.

 

Personally I won't ONS with someone if I want a relationship with them

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my body is a cage
For me no, I've done the whole you're my temporary girlfriend on a ONS before.

 

Personally I won't ONS with someone if I want a relationship with them

 

You mean you won't have sex with them the first time you hook up? (Even if they wanted to)

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CommitmentPhobe
Oh and also I'm not asking about wanting a relationship, I mean like a friends with benefits situation.

 

Yes I might continue it into an FWB

 

But a relationship, it's just a no go.

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Just because a relationship is very short term ONS or is a relationship with strict limits ie: FWB doesn't mean the people involved need to be cruel or abusive. Cuddling next to a warm body after sex is one of the best parts of sex. Short term or FWB just means that we don't lie to our partner or led them on, no need to be nasty.

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so you mean you can still be affectionate because you can still have fond feelings for the person?

 

Truly, it's hard to know whether or not you have fond feelings for someone after a one night stand. You don't even know one another at all at that juncture.

 

Sure, another hook up is probably quite possible.

Did you exchange numbers?

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How can you have warm feelings for someone you're only objectifying for sex?

 

Remember an ONS is emotionally detached, and if you fall for that other person, you're just setting yourself up for a big heartache.

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In a FWB situation you should absolutely engage in all the post-sex affection that comes natural.

A ONS with someone you just met and will never see again....it's less clear. I usually initiate such contact and it's usually welcomed. Holding hands is the most often rejected.

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my body is a cage

gahh ok i guess i need to clarify the situation. it tried to keep it vague as to not give away too many details of my personal life on the internet but oh well.

 

its not exactly a ONS: last weekend, i hooked up with this guy who i have multiple classes with at school, same major and interests, mutual friends (always see him out), and have been flirting with for a while, etc.

 

basically my question is: does the fact that he initiated things like hand holding, and cuddling, and the fact that he knows we see each other around almost every day, possibly mean that he wants this to be more than a one time thing?

 

ps yes we exchanged numbers, and he told me i should stop by his room, whatever that means

 

oh and pps we have THREE (highly interactive small) classes together next semester... not sure how this is gonna play out haha

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