I just dont know what to think?

[Markyboy]

Sorry its long but bare with me.

 

Well, basically……we have been together 2 years 8 months. Yes we have had a few minor ups and downs in the relationship, but dosn’t everybody. I never thought that I could feel this way about her. People didn’t think that she was my type.

 

I always found telling her how I felt a problem sometimes in the relationship, because how ive been hurt in the past. But she would always tell me how she felt, and i knew she loved me.

 

A year into the relationship, I split up with her because of some of the things she said to me via a text message which I found unforgiveable (she usually says things that shoot herself in the foot).

 

During this time she kept telling me she was empty inside, and misses me so much, and we kept in contact, she told me of how I ripped her heart out and stomped all over it.

But after a few weeks, I realised what she meant to me and I didn’t want to loose her, so I asked if we could meet up to sort this out. Then we got back together, which was what we both wanted, and things were back to how they was.

 

 

 

Fast forward to August this year, me, her and her parents go on holiday for 2 weeks. which was great. Then in September she moves out of our hometown, from her parents house to live 25 miles away in a shared flat with her 2 university mates, because she is in her last year of studies.

She dosnt drive a car, so this move was to give her a little more time to concentrate on her studies, and less time to worry about getting up early and commuting to and from university.

 

She was upset and scared because she didn’t want it to effect our relationship, and deep down I was scared to.

 

Things have been going great, I would stay up at the flat a couple times a week, she would come back and stay at mine a couple times. We would communicate, call, text, msn etc…….she told me she missed me and loved me. That she loved me a little more every day, I was her world and that I make her the person she is.

 

Ive done a lot for her these last 2 months, like any boyfriend would do. I was there for when she fell out with her uni friend last month, ive been there for her when her work was getting her down, ive been there for her when she was having money problems.

She had to pay her landlord rent, Her university loan didn’t come through, her work didn’t pay her, and she is into her overdraft. I offered to help with the money, but she declined, saying she would never ask any money from me. But she broke down, and asked me if I could help her.

In the end she told her parents, who helped her with some money. They thanked me for looking out for her.

 

All these times she was down, she turned to me, and she thanked me, and said she wouldnt know what to do if i wasnt there.

 

Last Saturday she stayed at my place, everything was fine, she told me she was so In love with me, and asked me if i liked being with her.

All throughout the whole relationship, there wasn’t a day that went by where we didn’t sleep together, and it was always great, recently it has been better than ever.

 

Sunday she tells me she has a few things in mind to get me for Christmas, and she wants us to see a comedian next year, and would like me to do a photoshoot for her…..so she was thinking of plans.

 

But on Tuesday night, she talks to me on msn and says she cant do this anymore. And says that I deserve better. That shes to much work and a waste of time for me. (she always has low self esteem) and she needs time away from commitment, time away from me, also to focus on her uni work, and she feels we have become to close……which is what she wanted the whole time!

She said, with me not being around she may realise she misses me, and it’s a mistake.

 

I just feel so bad because she did it on MSN, I thought she owes me a little more than that. I guess she didn’t want to deal with the hurt of doing it face to face.

 

 

Yesterday I spoke to her on msn. I havnt text or phoned her…..because she knows how I feel about her.

She text me goodnight x last night, and said goodnight too. I havnt spoken to her today.

But her facebook status says shes “full of emotion, and dosnt know which way to turn”

 

 

Thanks for reading……any insights would help.

[ThomasX]

Hello mark, my friend. My names thomas, its nice to meet you. It's unfortunate they have to be because of these circumstances, though.

 

Let me put this into perspective.

 

Girls are insane.

 

..haha, sorry. Just trying to give light humor a shot. (No offense to all the nice girls here-- like melissa).

 

I know what it feels like to be in a loving and seemingly perfect relationship, then to be dumped over an electronic device. I can sympathize and empathize with you because this just happened to me November 4th when my ex broke up with me over the cell after many, MANY wonderful months together.

 

Your best bet is to give her the space she wants. She's probably cluttered right now and just needs space. Cut off all 100% contact with her. No contact, and I do mean NO CONTACT, is your only chance at recollection, in my most honest opinion.

 

You have to give her space to see what she's lost.

 

That's what I'm doing. Although I'm not so sure I deserve a second chance. I was always a good bf like you in the right that I always listened to her and I drove 80 miles every weekend to go see her, and I loved her... but I was always a little distant and I never showed as much emotion as I should have.

 

Anyways... not trying to hijack your thread here. Keep ya head up friend

[Thomas X]

You must be feeling pain right now. I can understand that.

 

Here's the thing.

 

Girls are crazy.

 

And by crazy, I mean INSANE!

 

(No offense to the nice girls here

 

Haha, sorry, just trying to push for some light humor.

 

To be honest, I am in the same boat as you. My ex, whom I loved dearly and drove 80 miles to see every weekend, broke up with me over the phone November 4th. It was a knife through the heart x1000.

 

It's messed up to have the girl you love, break up with you like that, isn't it?

 

Your best mode of action is No Contact. Absolute, 100%, no contact. You have to give her 100% space to see what she's losing.

 

Do not talk to her. At all. No exceptions. Just... don't.

 

It's your best and only shot if you want her back.

[Markyboy]

thanks 4 ur reply

 

well, she just phoned me, yes, i answered, i asked her why she was phoning me.....she started talking, and just burst out into tears on me.

 

she said in tears she has to concentrate 100% on her being a make up artist at uni to proove all her doubters wrong, but she cant concentrate on that, because she thinks about me all the time. she thinks about the past and the things that she wants to do with me and the things she has done with me........she said she has been crying the last 3 days, cried in her friends arms for over an hour. Thinking about me every minute. She can smell me on her bed and pillows.

 

She has missed hearing my voice, 3 years she has always heard from me and spoken to me, she says she couldnt bare the thought of hurting me, even though she is in pain right now. I know deep down in her heart of hearts, that she wants me. But she wants abit of space, and no commitment, so she can focus on her degree, cos she gets distracted when she thinks of me.