melcany Posted November 11, 2008 Posted November 11, 2008 I've been feeling like I have no goals to aspire to. I'm not sure what career I'd like to have, but I know that my current job is not what I want to do for the rest of my life. I am overqualified and underpaid. I am grateful that I have a job in this terrible economy, but I realize I can do better. I have a lot of debt, I'm living at home with my mother right now because I can't afford to be on my own. I would like to move back to California (lived there for a few years) because I feel very displaced here in NYC. I can't figure out how to create a nice life for myself. I am single and depressed that I don't have a relationship. I am mostly alone and feel lonely, even though I have many friends. I have a lot of talents and abilities, but they are never utilized. I enjoy forensic psychology, law, dramatic arts (acting), but don't know where my true passion lies. I feel like I am in a whirpool of confusion on so many levels. Where do I live? What do I do for a living? I feel like I have nothing to show for my life and I am now 30 years old. I feel as though my life is just passing me by, and all I can do is stand at a distance watching it. Does anyone have any thoughts or suggestions for me?
lonelyandfrustrated Posted November 11, 2008 Posted November 11, 2008 check out the personality tests at similar minds *dot* com. I suggest taking the Jung/enneagram (sp?), it will spit out your personality type and also give a lot of suggestions for a field of work. Hey, it can't hurt, right?
Mindee Posted November 12, 2008 Posted November 12, 2008 Hi, Well I just joined this site and this is my first post ever. I am no mental health expert but it sounds like you could be suffering from clinical depression. It might be a good idea to consult with a therapist if you can. If you cannot, then you have to deal with this yourself. Here is my (free) advice...for what it's worth... 1-Make a list of the things you would like to change about your life by looking at what you want instead of what you dislike. For example, instead of focusing on your debt, your confusion, your work boredom, write down what you WANT. You want to create more wealth, you want to have purposeful work, etc. 2-Read up increasing self-esteem. It sounds like you have a very low opinion of yourself. This is not going to help you. How will anyone else (an employer, a lover, anyone) see your worth if you do not see it? 3-It sounds so cliche but find SOMETHING to appreciate every day. When you do a good job at something at work, give yourself some props. When you feel healthy and have strength and vitality, appreciate that moment in the moment. 4-Commit to doing ONE thing different each week. This week, it could be you start an exercise program or set aside extra money to pay down your debt. 5-Do something that feels purposeful to you FOR someone else. The fastest way for you to stop feeling sorry for yourself is to do something for someone else. Plan to spend Thanksgiving giving to someone who doesn't even have a home as you do. Mentor a teen, read to the elderly....do something to get out of your own story. 6-Remember your faith. If you have any spiritual foundation, now is the time to draw on that and spend time getting in touch with your spiritual needs. For many people, looking at the "big picture" helps them manage the little picture. 7-Stop thinking so much. The more negative things you think about, somehow, the more negative things you draw to you. Not sure how this works but really depressed people seem to spiral out of control to greater depression and really positive and happy people tend to attract more positive results. This is not by accident....you must learn to focus on what you want in a positive way instead of focusing on the stuff that's not exactly as you want it right now. Lastly....remember you ARE worthy of love, of joy, of purposeful work....but you must see this truth for yourself before you can receive it. Blessings...
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