MichiganMan222 Posted November 11, 2008 Posted November 11, 2008 The NC has really helped me so far. I went from feeling that too familiar 'pang' in my chest and stomach constantly to not thinking about her. I've moved on and am actively seeking romance. I met a woman online and we started chatting. She's very beautiful and it turns out she was in the same situation as me. She was divorced after a long marriage and then got into an LTR. That was 'on and off' throughout and it ended in Aug. The same time mine did. I was excited and fired up. She seemed to respond very well to me. We planned a live date this coming weekend. We exchanged real names. I Googled her name to see if I could find more info about it. I was really excited to learn about her. Well in one of the results, it was a Facebook page of a girl with the same name (wasn't her), but the sight of the Facebook address made that 'pang' hit me. Because it was Facebook where I learned my ex was dating already. I haven't gone NEAR FB and MS since then. I deleted or deactivated my accounts. That horrible empty feeling went away quickly after seeing that and I'm thinking about the date again. She's gorgeous. Anyway, it got me thinking...if I reacted like that to the Facebook address, is it too soon? I feel over her. I don't think about her 24/7 like I did just a month ago. I'm NC and have not had any urges whatsoever to break it. I don't wonder what she's doing. I don't care if she's still with that guy or not. If she contacted me, I would ignore EASILY.... I feel happy and excited about this date. I want to love again. We are both looking for a LTR. Its just that feeling I had. Why? Can that be expected? Am I really not over her? Thoughts?
EmperorR Posted November 11, 2008 Posted November 11, 2008 I would say go for it, life is short. Just take things slow, don't rush into anything. Remember she is not your ex, try not to think oh my ex liked this or that. Best of luck to you, I wish I was at your stage. I'm currently talking to a girl she is nice, but I probably ruined it already, as I told her my story about being cheated on and how its hard to have trust in a woman (ya i know mistake number 1). I know the feeling regarding the facebook etc., I peeped my ex and also saw that she is dating it bothered me at first but then I didn't care, it's a very hard feeling especially with someone you've loved for so long. best of luck.
Author MichiganMan222 Posted November 11, 2008 Author Posted November 11, 2008 Thanks! I'm glad you said that. All day, I've been staring at a picture of my date. I can't wait to meet her. She has such a beautiful smile and the best thing I can do is compare her to my ex at this point LOL!!! I'm so bitter towards the way she ended things with me. But I know what you mean about being careful talking about the past relationships. I know it comes up. Certainly prospective dates would like to know the history to help them judge if you're a good mate. I always emphasize that I'm over my ex, but do miss having someone in my life. I'm very vague saying things like 'there was conflict' and it ended. None of it is a lie, but I don't want to spook them be thinking I'm not good at relationships. Plus, they are single too...for some reason LOL. Anyway, I'll keep you posted. Its hard not setting my expectations high right now, but I know its a long shot too. I don't feel this is rebound either. I am attracted to this woman and not just her looks. Sometimes you can tell a little about someone in how they carry themselves in a picture.
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