sigh Posted November 10, 2008 Posted November 10, 2008 I ran into xMM. I do not know why he was there without his W. It was someplace he knew I would be as it was a plan I had had for months. My heart is breaking and I just do not understand. I want to understand his insanity. Just looking for some support right now because this is harder then I ever imagined it would be.
Holding-On Posted November 10, 2008 Posted November 10, 2008 You are probably pretty wonderful, and even more so that in an affair we usually only get to see a tiny fantasy bit of a person so he probably simply misses you and wishes he could pick up the cake in his life again. Perhaps he was checking to see if he could hook you again. Stay strong. Hold on. I'm sure more people will be on soon to cheer you on. Cyber hugs
Completely Broken Posted November 10, 2008 Posted November 10, 2008 I saw xbf/hh yesterday and lets just say he didn't make it easy and I've decided that we can't talk or see each other. On the 17th I go back to work and will have to see him, I'll probably be writing that night about how terrible it was seeing him but I'm going to make sure I look good They miss us, that's why he showed up where he knew you would be, they want there cake and to eat it too. My plan is to make sure I look extra special if I'm anywhere he may show up and to just smile and act like I'm wonderful even when I'm crumbling inside. Stay Strong!!!
Geishawhelk Posted November 10, 2008 Posted November 10, 2008 That's a really, really good strategy, CB., because, after a while, we can actually effect a mind-set that enables us to move on. If you manifest a care-fee, Devil-may-care, exuberant attitude, it really does help, in the long run. By all means, scream, rant rave, throw stuff at home, where nobody can see you - but outside, who gives a damn!! I'm fine, thanks! Look at me! As The song in "My Fair Lady" goes - "I can do bloody well without you!"
Completely Broken Posted November 10, 2008 Posted November 10, 2008 Now I'm a crier Geisha so we'll see how well it works out when I see him in person. I'll look fly but tears may come. I just have to figure out how to hide the tears.
Geishawhelk Posted November 10, 2008 Posted November 10, 2008 Cough. Choke on something. Think of a really funny joke. Think of George Clooney with no clothes on. Think of me with no clothes on. Not a pretty sight. Think of the funniest Comedian you can, or the funniest film. Anything but what he's thinking.
Enema Posted November 10, 2008 Posted November 10, 2008 I ran into him today, it was so hard That's what she said. http://www.instantrimshot.com/
Author sigh Posted November 13, 2008 Author Posted November 13, 2008 Seeing him watching me, not even from a far distance, just made my heart ache. He has tried to contact me once since then. I can almost set my watch on the times that he tries to contact.
LakesideDream Posted November 13, 2008 Posted November 13, 2008 Sigh, Often people, often men I think put their needs ahead of the pain they may cause. My worthless advice is to put on your best smile and pretend you can't be bothered. You'll get a tiny rush from knowing that you were able to get through a painful situation. My heart hurts for you,
Author sigh Posted November 13, 2008 Author Posted November 13, 2008 Lakeside: Thank you so much. What I do not understand is the last few months, after I ended it before, he turned very uncaring and everything was about sex, so why does he not just leave me alone and go find a new piece of a$$?
frannie Posted November 13, 2008 Posted November 13, 2008 Lakeside: Thank you so much. What I do not understand is the last few months, after I ended it before, he turned very uncaring and everything was about sex, so why does he not just leave me alone and go find a new piece of a$$? Because last time he sensed that you weren't quite over him so he could act a lot more uncaring... and this time you're sounding (are?) through with him, and that's probably denting his ego a bit? You can't possibly be OVER him, can you?? (would be my guess is what's going through his mind).
mrmatt Posted November 13, 2008 Posted November 13, 2008 Sigh, Often people, often men I think put their needs ahead of the pain they may cause. Grrrrr....Is there not a woman on the other side of the equation of the man that puts his needs first? Wouldn't that mean they both are putting their needs ahead of the pain their causing the other husbands, wives, children and families?
whichwayisup Posted November 13, 2008 Posted November 13, 2008 so why does he not just leave me alone Because he doesn't care to. It's all about him and what HE wants. Attention, reaction, just knowing that you miss or crave him FEEDS his ego. Don't EVER show your true emotions and feelings around him. He is dead to you - That is how you must handle this. Act like you couldn't give a sh*t either way.
Author sigh Posted November 13, 2008 Author Posted November 13, 2008 I was laughing, smiling and looking amazing that night. He has no idea the pain I am in. Only my LS friends do. It was so strange that he did not even say hello, just watched. I do not is get that at all. He always does that now when he is at the same place as me whether his W is with him or not.
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