Bells Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 Okay.....I think I posted about my date before on this.....the one that would prefer to "hangout" with her friends than to go on a date with me. Well, she typically works out of town for 5 days (stays in a hotel for 5 of those days) and then she, comes home on the weekends....and socializes then. Well, I ask her out for this weekends, and she said, "Well, her friends have been calling her wanting to see her, to hang out with them." And I go, "Well, think you could forgoe a night out with you friends to hang out with me?" Suprisingly she said, "What do you have in mind?" And I told her what we could do....and she told me that she doesn't get out of her Yoga class until 8pm,a nd probably won't be ready till 9....and said I would have to wait until then." I said no problem. The night before, I call, and she answers and say she's at work...and asks me what's up...and I say, "Well, I was wanting to find out where to pick you up so we can go out tomorrow night." And she said, "Tomorrooow...no...sorry, I can't do that, I'll be out with my friends that night...and I only get TWO days to be with my friends...and they have been calling me all week to tell meto go hang out with them...so she really would like to spend the time with them. And I said, "Well, you agreed to go out with me Sat night" And she goes, "I diiiid? When?" And I go, "Well, in the email you sent to me" kind of read it back." Now, perhaps I could rewind back....and she said, "What do you have in mind?" and I stated what we could do. And shes said, "Well Iill be coming home around 8 or 9, so I'd have shower, so you'd have to wait." I said, "Sure, no problem" So that was an agreement there...I guess. The woman seems to like to lead guys on, pretend to make dates...and then when the time comes its like "OH!! I thought you meant we were suppose to go out Saturday, not Friday! Or say, "Oh, we agreed on that??!!" But then she could say, "Well, I never actually said YES to going out with you" Just just likes to play games and crap. Ever run into people that lead you on, pretend to make dates, and then say, "Oh, did I say that??" MAN, this pisses me off.
samspade Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 Immature, disrespectful, and not serious in her intentions. Next her.
Trialbyfire Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 She's either playing games or is really that ditzy. Either way, lose her.
Author Bells Posted November 8, 2008 Author Posted November 8, 2008 She's either playing games or is really that ditzy. Either way, lose her. She's probably got so many "Male friends" calling her during the week to see her, so many choices. Funny thing is, she's brand new to this country, she's asian, and she's left the whole asian woman respect and thoughtfulness behind her.
kashmir Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 I love how stupid some girls think guys are. Some of the blow-off's I've gotten over time have been so pathetic that it instantly turned me off. I want a girl who's at least witty enough to convince me she's sincerely unavailable.
Alex_M Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 She's probably got so many "Male friends" calling her during the week to see her, so many choices. Funny thing is, she's brand new to this country, she's asian, and she's left the whole asian woman respect and thoughtfulness behind her. Exact same with me. She's not new to the country but she is asian. She gets a lot of attention when she's out and I'm not around. She even told me she likes it (which I understand and don't mind, I do too!) but she said she hated feeling guilty about it. Which is the most bitchiest thing i've ever heard her say. Maybe when she gets messed around she will come back to you. But I know by then, if it was me it would be too late.
Author Bells Posted November 8, 2008 Author Posted November 8, 2008 I love how stupid some girls think guys are. Some of the blow-off's I've gotten over time have been so pathetic that it instantly turned me off. I want a girl who's at least witty enough to convince me she's sincerely unavailable. Yeah, she was like a deer trapped in headlights. lol Esp when I read BACK her own email to her...she didn't know what to do or say...except..."Soooorrryyy!"
Meet 4 Coffee Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 Many posters last week told you straight up that she just wasn't into you, and you made excuses that it was her cultural perception on dating, and not understanding dates. Why did you keep pursuing her when she shot you down cold a few times now? It's not her, it's you. She's just being nice so as to not have to say straight up "I'm just not into you. I don't want to go out with you." She thought you'd get the picture after last week and not wanting to see you then. She was kindly saying 'I'm just not into you....at all, in any way, shape, or form.' Hope this helps!
Meet 4 Coffee Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 I want a girl who's at least witty enough to convince me she's sincerely unavailable. Would you rather she tell you "I'm not attracted to you in any way, shape, or form, and it'll be a cold day in hell before I go out with you?"
BoerumHill Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 Yeah, she was like a deer trapped in headlights. lol Esp when I read BACK her own email to her...she didn't know what to do or say...except..."Soooorrryyy!" She's just not that into you. Next.
Trialbyfire Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 My devil's horns just popped up through my hair so I'm going to share this. I really can't stand people who play games like this. Call her up again and set your next date. Be very specific about date, time and place. Then stand her up. Oh, and don't forget to check the weather report to make sure it's on a night where it's poring rain!
Shygirl15 Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 Please. Bells has big issues with himself. I have never ever met any guy who faces so much problems with women as much as he does. Funny thing is that he blames it all on them. I mean, how is it possible that all 20 women you've talked about in 1 week have issues and you don't? Spare me.
Author Bells Posted November 8, 2008 Author Posted November 8, 2008 Many posters last week told you straight up that she just wasn't into you, and you made excuses that it was her cultural perception on dating, and not understanding dates. Why did you keep pursuing her when she shot you down cold a few times now? It's not her, it's you. She's just being nice so as to not have to say straight up "I'm just not into you. I don't want to go out with you." She thought you'd get the picture after last week and not wanting to see you then. She was kindly saying 'I'm just not into you....at all, in any way, shape, or form.' Hope this helps! She's playing games, it's obvious, she agreed to go out with me, so she didn't shoot me down. She made plans the first time, and there was an error in communication as to when we were going to meet, I allowed that excuse to slide (I give them a 2nd chance) This time was the 2nd chance, she agreed again, this time I was going to nail her to a date and time, and she did, Sat, around 8 or 9pm....when I finally called her to get her address in order to go pick her up.....she played dumb by saying, "We're going out? When did I say that?"
Storyrider Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 I hope she did a 180 and not a 360, otherwise you're not getting very far.
Author Bells Posted November 8, 2008 Author Posted November 8, 2008 Exact same with me. She's not new to the country but she is asian. She gets a lot of attention when she's out and I'm not around. She even told me she likes it (which I understand and don't mind, I do too!) but she said she hated feeling guilty about it. Which is the most bitchiest thing i've ever heard her say. Maybe when she gets messed around she will come back to you. But I know by then, if it was me it would be too late. Wow...almost uncanny....what kind of asian is she? What country? This one I'm talking too probably been here about a year, I remember her telling me when dating where she's from, she has to introduce the date to the family and friends as well. I think asians by nature are social. She said she HATES feeling guilty about it....lol...what bunk....if she hates feeling guilty about it...well then, why don't she stop it??
Author Bells Posted November 8, 2008 Author Posted November 8, 2008 I hope she did a 180 and not a 360, otherwise you're not getting very far. lol...it was a Seinfeld reference.
Storyrider Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 lol...it was a Seinfeld reference. Oh, good. What a relief. =)
Author Bells Posted November 8, 2008 Author Posted November 8, 2008 Please. Bells has big issues with himself. I have never ever met any guy who faces so much problems with women as much as he does. Funny thing is that he blames it all on them. I mean, how is it possible that all 20 women you've talked about in 1 week have issues and you don't? Spare me. 20? I think you're exaggerating.
kashmir Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 Please. Bells has big issues with himself. I have never ever met any guy who faces so much problems with women as much as he does. Funny thing is that he blames it all on them. I mean, how is it possible that all 20 women you've talked about in 1 week have issues and you don't? Spare me. Eh...well, sometimes we tend to strike in the wrong places. I've had a lot more bad experiences with girls than good, and I honestly don't think I did anything that wrong...nothing that deserved the kind of responses I'd get. So it's possible to have a streak of bad luck with the opposite sex if you're looking in the wrong places.
Meet 4 Coffee Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 OK....last week you set up a date and she stated "I might be hanging out with friends at the bar that night, I don't know." When you asked her out. OK, women who are interested in a guy would have gone out and not gone out with TENTATIVE plans with friends. The fact that she came up with this excuse of POSSIBLY going out with her friends at the bar was her way of giving you the brush off. WE TOLD YOU THEN THAT SHE WASN'T INTO YOU. LEAVE THE POOR GIRL ALONE SO SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO KEEP PRETENDING TO BE NICE BY "ACCEPTING" DATES WITH YOU AND THEN BAILING WITH THE EXCUSE THAT SHE DOESN'T REMEMBER. A WOMAN WHO WANTS TO GO OUT WITH A GUY DOESN'T DO THIS. THIS IS THE BEHAVIOR OF A NICE YOUNG WOMAN WHO IS NOT ATTRACTED TO YOU IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM AND IS TOO NICE TO TURN YOU DOWN STRAIGHT OUT. SHE DOESN'T WANT TO HAVE TO TELL YOU STRAIGHT OUT THAT SHE ISN'T ATTRACTED TO YOU IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM, AND IT WILL BE A COLD DAY IN HELL BEFORE SHE'LL GO OUT WITH YOU. SHE IS HOPING AND PRAYING THAT THIS TIME YOU'LL FINALLY TAKE THE HINT. Hope this helps!
Author Bells Posted November 8, 2008 Author Posted November 8, 2008 THIS IS THE BEHAVIOR OF A NICE YOUNG WOMAN Hope this helps! A NICE...young woman? LOL...you're trying to turn this around on me and make ME look like the bad guy? You're sadly mistaken...this is far from nice, she is rude, immature, and inconsiderate. Leave this POOR girl alone? You trying to make her sound like the "poor widdle, girl?" Too funny I get a kick out of how you're trying to twist this around though, nice try.
D-Jam Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 OK....last week you set up a date and she stated "I might be hanging out with friends at the bar that night, I don't know." When you asked her out. OK, women who are interested in a guy would have gone out and not gone out with TENTATIVE plans with friends. The fact that she came up with this excuse of POSSIBLY going out with her friends at the bar was her way of giving you the brush off. WE TOLD YOU THEN THAT SHE WASN'T INTO YOU. LEAVE THE POOR GIRL ALONE SO SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO KEEP PRETENDING TO BE NICE BY "ACCEPTING" DATES WITH YOU AND THEN BAILING WITH THE EXCUSE THAT SHE DOESN'T REMEMBER. A WOMAN WHO WANTS TO GO OUT WITH A GUY DOESN'T DO THIS. THIS IS THE BEHAVIOR OF A NICE YOUNG WOMAN WHO IS NOT ATTRACTED TO YOU IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM AND IS TOO NICE TO TURN YOU DOWN STRAIGHT OUT. SHE DOESN'T WANT TO HAVE TO TELL YOU STRAIGHT OUT THAT SHE ISN'T ATTRACTED TO YOU IN ANY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM, AND IT WILL BE A COLD DAY IN HELL BEFORE SHE'LL GO OUT WITH YOU. SHE IS HOPING AND PRAYING THAT THIS TIME YOU'LL FINALLY TAKE THE HINT. Hope this helps! And women wonder why so many guys lie to them. Why so many guys will lie their way to get laid, then so easily toss them aside. And women wonder why men won't respect them, or why they get into their 30s and it seems no men want to commit or marry. Face facts ladies...you want honesty and respect, it goes both ways. She should have just come clean with Bells when he asked her out, not this "protect his feelings" BS, or what probably is "avoid conflict" cowardice. If you women can't be honest with men, then don't complain when men won't be honest with you...or worse when men won't trust you and thus you all end up wondering why you can't find a husband. Do I sound bitter? I was one of those guys women seemed to never be honest with. Soft plans which lead to being blown off. This is why I don't feel sorry for women anymore when they suddenly wake up and can't find a husband, or they moan how no guys will be honest and commit to them, or they keep charading in the "I don't need a man" song and dance, when it's clear these particular women want a man more than anything. All this woman's actions have done is given Bells more fuel to one day soon decide to stop being a respectable male and just be an *******. These actions are what make guys like Bells decide one day to just lie his brains off to get laid and laugh at women when they end up used and hurt. Two-way street ladies. Try to justify it as much as you want, or play the victim card to death...you can't get honesty and respect if you don't give it.
Meet 4 Coffee Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 You can only be an a**hole to women if they actually want you in the first place.
D-Jam Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 You can only be an a**hole to women if they actually want you in the first place. Funny how many hot women will bang the ugliest men...simply because these guys treat them like crap. I will bet money if Bells were to dress like a yuppie, act cocky, pretend to have money, lie like crazy...hot women would sleep with him on the first night, and then when he kicks them to the curb these women will be fighting to try to keep him. I'm not saying all women are this stupid...but it astounds me how many hot women I've seen in my life who destroy themselves in the name of trying to tame a jerk. If I sound angry, it's because I hate when women do what this one did to Bells to no end. It's immature, disrespectful, and only further paints a picture of disgust and misogyny to men like Bells. It's honestly why I stopped feeling bad for women when karma comes up and bites them on the arses. I almost laugh now at every stupid girl who gets abused by the guy she herself should have never gotten with...or when they are alone and wondering why they can't find a man. It disgusts me that members of the female gender think they can just do this to guys, and then they have the audacity to demand that men should respect and be honest with them.
carhill Posted November 8, 2008 Posted November 8, 2008 IMO, the best way to deal with this is to treat women the way your moral center dictates and accept only similar behavior from them. All else is unacceptable. I would not (and do not) change my standards and practices by (based on) how others treat me. All their actions do is speak to their value That's what I've been trying to say to the OP since he started posting about this ongoing "date" a couple weeks ago...
Recommended Posts