goughie_69 Posted November 6, 2008 Posted November 6, 2008 my girlfriend was a wild one before she met me. and i have been filled in on the details by various people and i know the past is the past but she wont do the wild things she has done with other boys with me and this makes me feel like im not good enough or i dont have somthung they have. we do love each other and this is my first partner. is there anyway of asking so i dont sound like i just want to use her. because i really love her but this is messing with my mind and i want to experiment a little.
Davey McG Posted November 6, 2008 Posted November 6, 2008 It might be that she doesn't want to do those things with you because she actually likes you, respects you and likes who she is with you. She might want to leave that part of her life behind, which I know is a bit of a disappointment, but she probably only did those things for approval from the other guys. I know its not of much comfort, but try watching Chasing Amy and you'll get a better idea.
Ronni_W Posted November 6, 2008 Posted November 6, 2008 i want to experiment a little. Your desire to experiment is perfectly natural and acceptable. The difficulty is that you are tying up your current desire with her past behaviour. They are not, in fact, related to each other. Why not try approaching it from a neutral place: "Hey, Hon, what do you think about trying _____ ? I was thinking it might be fun/kinky/cool/exciting (whatever)." At the end of the day, if you cannot let go of her past, then you must let her go. She cannot change it, ever, and you will just end up feeling permanently resentful, inadequate, incompetent and bitter. And she does not deserve to be in relationship with that just because she has lived a little.
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