Holding-On Posted November 5, 2008 Posted November 5, 2008 or more like a cold-hearted b#### actually. MM and I ended up in each other's company and essentially I kept it all business and kinda snubbed him (started working with loud machinery whenever he came near). He wanted to talk more. On the phone he asked if I trusted him and I said no, not really because after all he has been lying to his wife who is far more important to him than me. I couldn't be really really sad because my day just wasn't that sad but I could tell he was very very dejected. My husband (we have an open marriage - you can read all about it on my other thread if it is confusing) thinks I would feel more of a jerk if I continued the affair (it was/is an EA) and ended up sleeping with him. Which is true but there isn't a middle ground to be friendly/loving for us (MM and me) and so I just got to watch him in torment. I'm avoiding him tomorrow and thereafter (as much as possible) but I read the withdrawal threads and feel very bad that I hurt him. I don't want MM to be so sad and being unable to comfort him bites. The thing is that I don't feel all that bad otherwise. My life isn't in any shambles or anything like that. This makes me feel guilty also.
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