robbieb Posted November 3, 2008 Posted November 3, 2008 hello and thank you for reading my thread my x and i were together for only 5 months (march 07 to Aug 07) we had a fantastic releationship i made her feel like the only women alive watching back on cam, made me realise why i Fell in love with her. today nov 08 is a different story. im 28 shes soon to be 24. she met me, and then from day one, i met my soul mate, bestfriend my everything to me. she gave me time, space, love, made me smile, i made her smile and being with her was amazing. there was a few issues i didnt like about her, but that was all. she finished with me, a week before her college course, a 3 yr nursing degree. she told me she wouldnt have time for me anymore and just ended it like that ! i couldnt understand so. when you love some1 you make time to be with them etc.. 4 months on, we did still see each other, she told me earlier on, she wasent interested in any other guy, if she was, then shed be with me. i was there for her, she lives 20 min car ride from me, so id walk her to the bus stop at any hour of the morning or night, she was ****e at looking after her own self, ie eating habbits, so id make her a packing up. and walking with her, doing this felt right to me. she had no money to get bus ticket, so i payed for her 1st one. £50 she kissed me and told me she loved me, i couldnt believe it!!then it was her bday, we went for a quite drink, then she left to go to work. then 3 weeks later she tells me online she went on a date with some1 2 weeks ago, and that she is seeing some1 else. from this day on, i have been heartbroken ever since. they have been dating since dec 07 and are still together today . apperently he has ££ and a nice house and this and that. i know she wants a horse and stable and nice house for the future etc.. he evan has a jaccuzzzi ! in the last 11 months...shes still been in my life and it feels like we havent parted. she would see me on her day off and wed have so much fun. i have wanted to to talk to her about us for so long. she tells me she misses me and is thinking of me? how so when your with another man? she never told me shes not in love with me anymore. i said to her please just put me out of my misery. i have tryed to inject so much fun into her life.. she works at college 5 days a week and 24 hrs working at week end. so i know how busy she gets. i know who i love and who i want to be with, at any stage or tiredness of my life, day noon and night. with her, she closes down, and when i talk about us being together..she dosent say anything and give me the same old excuses, im tired..please i dont want to talk about this . all i know is her bf has ££ a nice place this and that. he is never around for her and is always busy. she tells me he dont want pixs with her , he dosent evan want to get married to her, and is not evan romantic to her? he dont like her tummy piercing? where im the opposite to him ! id say and do and make her feel like shes the most important person alive, cause i understnad her that way ! its her bthday this sat..i asked her would you like to go for a meal. she said you being serious, i said yes. why aint her bf doing anythign for her? but !.. what the hell is she doing with him? im the one who has been there for her, 6 weeks ago she was crying on the fone to me, he dosent want to talk to me, all he wants to do is sleep. then i go why you with him for? i dont understant what he has over her? hes never there for her. dosent evan compliment her nothing. her car packed up..2 weeks ago? why aint he taking her to hospital and looking after her needs? this is all getting to me , when she calls me im saying, im missing you! to be with some1 you must love them..so how can she be thinking of me and missing me when shes with another man?. anyway... on friday past, i hadent seen here for 2.5 weeks. i met her at the train station, there was no hello, and she was quite off with me. (privous to that, shed call me and talk...everythign would be ok) got to mine, i had the agenda of what i wanted to say to her. i made her a dvd of me and her. and done a special photograph of me and her and written her a letter. all in one small package . i wrote down a script what i was going to say to her. i expressed this. to her. basically me telling her, i cant do this anymore after 20 months i dont understand her relationship. and how shes missing me and so,i told her im asking what you want,,thats the most importnat thing m what she wants? she sat there crying...i go to her if you say nothing to me ..then were gonna have to end it here...no more robbie and jemma..no more you calling me, your gonna have to let me move on with my life.. she said i better go ...i said to her im not gonna follow you this time.. she left ( i placed the package in her bag) 2 mins later, my legs were shaky and head very dazy, i followed her, it was like she didnt know me, i saidm this is it jemma? your not gonna fight for us? dont you care about not seeing me anymore... got to the trainstation, she started crying, then walked to the train. saw her head down, with more crying, i walked home. i tried my best. my legs were floppy and my head was dizzy, i walked home nearly cring my self. i said to my self..its over... i got a call 10 mins later..she apologised. i didnt know what to say to her..told her to leave me alone, she said she cant fight her feelings when shes around me? and her life is so fxxxxked up...she now feels lost next day i got a call from her at 11am while she was at work saying, her life is in a mess..again i didnt know what to say to her..i was silent..then fone went dead... she called me at 750..saying she watched the dvd, i said, what did you think, she said i cant say cause it will make me cry...she asked if im ok?? i said im fine..then she put the fone down ( her mum picking her up from work) then sunday.. i finished my night shift..i went on msn...mins later so did she..i didnt speak to her at all..cause i really have nothing to say to her! like i said i have tried my hardest to give her..what she really wants. i got into bed and got a txt message..saying..."why didnt i talk to her" what does she expect me to say? ive finally had enouth..i cant wait any longer for her then i already have. i just want her to leave me alone now, but when she calls and txts..that just gets to me..that this is finally over.. last but not least..her fone i bought, the sim i found out..its her bfs contract he bought her!! so everytime she calls me..not her money calling me his my number will he there!!..i hate it.. why is she with him for? we were so perfect last yr..now its come to this heartache and pain :(
norajane Posted November 3, 2008 Posted November 3, 2008 It doesn't matter why she is with him...she is. Why are you still hanging around her, is the real question. It's time to go No Contact and get over her. No contact at all. No phone, text, im, email, carrier pigeon, no hanging around the train station, no seeing her or talking to her. You will never get her out of your system if you see her and talk to her all the time. You do have to let her go and get on with your life. While you are hanging after her and carrying that torch for her, you will never meet anyone who might actually want to BE with YOU instead of dating some other guy and using you as her back-up. It's time. Let her go.
Author robbieb Posted November 3, 2008 Author Posted November 3, 2008 i was around cause shed just txt m or call me.. i dont have her number at all.. shes the one who is tellng me that she misses me etc. ean tonight got an email saying...can i call you? after friday gone? dont she get it that i want to move on? i just dont nderstand her, if she dosent contact me, i know i can move on alot better.
Geishawhelk Posted November 3, 2008 Posted November 3, 2008 If she texts you, you have her number. Block her calls, texts, emails - do everything you can to delete her off your days. Do it. You can, you know you can. You just don't want to. because every time you see/talk to her, that hope is till there. IT'S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. She's using you as a convenience. Shut it off. close down and do not accept anything by way of a communication form her, ever again!! You knoiw it makes sense! Ask anyone here who's broken NC how stupid it was to do so! Ask anyone here who's maintained NC how better it got over time. Sure it's painful. Of course it hurts. But whilst this lasts, it will be worse.
norajane Posted November 3, 2008 Posted November 3, 2008 i was around cause shed just txt m or call me.. i dont have her number at all.. shes the one who is tellng me that she misses me etc. ean tonight got an email saying...can i call you? after friday gone? dont she get it that i want to move on? i just dont nderstand her, if she dosent contact me, i know i can move on alot better. Have you TOLD her not to contact you? Perhaps you should, otherwise, if you keep replying to her, she will keep contacting you. And, btw, her saying she misses you is her way of keeping you around as a back-up, and her way of getting the ego validation she seems to be in need of. And, btw, if she had anything important to tell you, she wouldn't ask if she could call you after Friday. She'd tell you what she wants to talk about in her email and she wouldn't make you wait until after Friday...wtf?
Yamaha Posted November 3, 2008 Posted November 3, 2008 She's using you as a convenience. So true. She is getting what she wants from you as well as him. Do yourself favor and get some self respect. She doesn't respect you or she wouldn't use you. She knows how you feel about her and she uses it because she is selfish. Do you honestly think she cares about you? Wake up and dump her. She's not even your friend.
NickP Posted November 3, 2008 Posted November 3, 2008 DELETE DELETE DELETE!!! get her out mate.. she's brought you nothing but misery. she's enjoying the best of both worlds.. a bf that can provide her with money and an ex-bf that loves her more than anythin. i don't know why she's still with him, but im guessing it's bcos of money. she's got to make a choice. YOU OR HIM. and you said she's made that choice. you got to realise mate that you're worth better than half a girl, especially since you're so willing to give yourself to someone. tell her to back off, stop calling you. show her you're serious. ignore her. don't reply to her texts. if she calls you, pick up and be polite and tell her you're busy. don't expect her to change her mind becos i don't think she will. Go on NO CONTACT. that's what's best for u.
Author robbieb Posted November 5, 2008 Author Posted November 5, 2008 thank you all for your support, when she txts me its from an online site..cbfsms.com? so the only number i get is the number from that site...and it changes all the time.. i never thought that her way of saying she misses me was a way of keeping me in the picture. she left me another email saying shes going to hospital tomorrow..about her upset stomach..is he gonna be there to look after her..? who knows i doubt it...im finding it very very very hard to get on with my life when she emails or txts..it aint fair. i do have feelings for her. but the way she is treating me is so upsetting. this has been gone on for 19 months..sad to say its her bday on sat..and i wont be there.. i just dont understand her...like you guys said why she with him...just for the ££££...thats a cruel thing to say to me then in it..that i haent got any... all i have is what i have to give..i have a job and so and have my own home... she told me shes insecure? dont know what of tho all i ever wanted was to be happy...life is what you make it...and its who you make it with. if some1 your wive..ie him...and hes not there for her or given her what she wants she gonna be down and depressed? her bf s job is to be there for her...whatever whenever. if she had some1 to make her smile and be there for her...and have fun.. then shed go home feelin wow ive had fun..this is what i want.. i dont know why she wont leave him...she will be a very unhappy women..in the few coming months.. this effects me in a way cause..i care about her. as i told her on friday no more..and thats it..im keeping to my word..but to see some1 you loved from going to a happy, vibrant, beautifal girl..into some1 you cant recognise its upsetting..been there for her for 19months..and now shes turned her life upside down... i am paying attention to you guys and its making em think more then you could ever know !! thank you so much
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