Kimora Posted November 2, 2008 Posted November 2, 2008 I have been with my boyfriend for five months now and we are in love with each other. He told me he broke up with his girlfriend before he came to the US. He told me he didn't love her and they were dating "kind of not really" Anyway, I saw a conversation he was having with her just recently and he said that "she was and still is the most beautiful, smart, woman he has ever met" this made me mad/sad/hurt all at the same because he says the very same thing to me all the time. He also says he misses her and right before he said she the most beautiful ever he siad he wanted to call her and tell but decided to tell her online. When I told him about it he said he was sorry and he didn't mean it and htat he feels bad for his ex because she is being forced to get married soon and she really isn't that good looking so to make her feel better he said that. He says that she talks to him first online and he feels bad and talks to her I don't know what to think, he talks to her quite frequently and even though they are 8 thousand miles away i still feel he misses her and is on a rebound. this hurt me deeply because he is the first man ever to love me and care about me, so by him saying this to me and then turning around saying it carelessly to his ex really hurts. is he being truthful or is he just a player???
pleasedontbreakme Posted November 4, 2008 Posted November 4, 2008 I think your guy might not realize what he's saying. He needs to be straight-forward and genuine. If I was in your situation, I would like to say to him "Do you really care about me/love me? Would you be doing this to me even though you know it hurts me?" I've been in a situation where it hurts so bad, but it would be better off alone than with someone you love who causes you so much pain. I don't know if you feel like you're in that situation just yet though. It truly hurts when someone you love is pining away for someone else, when you give them your everything.
Dark-N-Romantic Posted November 4, 2008 Posted November 4, 2008 Try making friends with her. If she is going to be that involved with you guy's life, you should get to know who she is. Just like he should get to know you your friends are. What easier way to possibly get the skinny on things? One thing I always tell a woman, who's instincts are usually stronger than men's, follow your instincts. Don't at like a raving, stalking, possessive woman. But, do follow up. Ask the questions. Do some investigations. This does not mean just go snooping through his stuff, but it does mean that first take notice of stuff that might be suspicious. Dressing differently, keeping things from you, feels the need to cover up things like phone calls or computer screens. He may not be a player or he may be. You can never tell. But, by all means, if he saids things that are out of line, call him on it. He may think it was nothing, but if he cares about you, he will at least address you on it and do what is nessary to try and bring some closure to the situation (and closure may not mean that he has to change how he does things, but he take better stock of your feelings). DNR I hope that made sense. I am going to bed now.
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