spupwc Posted October 30, 2008 Posted October 30, 2008 first post but been on here reading for a few weeks and it has helped some but m having ups and downs. long story but will try n keep it sh-ort as poss. was n a very rocky rel. for almost 5 yrs. in which we were n still r married for almost 2. anniverary is nov.9 we split and got back together so many times it's rediculas. My son and I moved out last nov.25 for reasons of her verbal abuse to my son plus me I might add. she was diagnosed with being bi-polar before we met, n she tried different meds but said they didn't work, n now she believes she was misdiagnosed but she admits to bein a megab**ch. our rel. was either extremely great or extremely horrible with her mood swings. anyhow this past yr. we were together alot but I wasn't officially moved in with her.. she met a guy this summer, we broke up n she dated him for two months, I stole her back n aug. n moved back in while my son stayed at his gradmas so we cud work on our marriage. this lasted two months and ended wen she wanted me out so she cud focus on herself but I knew she wud be back with the other guy cuz she was keeping in touch with him while I was with her.. she's cheated on me also with him while I was back with her... so yes now they r together again n I miss her like an idiot!! I need help! Im eating again n don't have the anxiety I once had but am still miserable more than not. it's been 12 days no contact although she tried too call 2 days ago but I didn't answer but m now struggling with the thought of calling her. I really want too tell her off n remind her of how much of a snake she is and with the same breath tell her how much I love her. soory for the rambling and I hope I explained my situation ok cause I cud really right a book about the past five yrs.
Konfuzion Posted October 30, 2008 Posted October 30, 2008 Nothing personal but she sounds like a total waste of time. Do not give into your feelings of wanting to call her, you will just go back to day one of the pain and start all over again. Besides that is exactly what she wants is to keep you in close enough contact that she can draw you back in anytime she needs you until the next guy comes along. Do yourself and your child a favor and stay away from her, work on improving yourself and with time you will be much better off for it.
lofi_tokyo Posted October 30, 2008 Posted October 30, 2008 Its good that you're posting here rather than contacting her. As Konfuzion said, she doesn't deserve your time. That being said I can totally relate to the whole wanting to break NC even though you know you shouldnt. Just keep on keeping on. No breaking NC! If you need strength, keep coming back here, we'll cheer ya on!
Author spupwc Posted October 30, 2008 Author Posted October 30, 2008 thanx for the input. I know it's for the best of nc and right now m very glad I havn't given in. just came bak from the gym n shrugged some of the bad feelings i was having today. m up n down with this.. one day at a time!!!
Konfuzion Posted October 31, 2008 Posted October 31, 2008 One thing that has helped me with bad feelings and so on is meditation, the benefits are truly amazing. I bought a book its a very quick read, I think I was done with it in about an hour and the CD that comes with it walks you through a very nice 20 minuite meditation. Anyway here is a link.
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