so gutted Posted October 28, 2008 Posted October 28, 2008 I am done with online dating. It hasnt produced anyone worthwhile for me. I have been severely addicted to a few sites lately to the extent that I do not eat properly. Sad - i know. They allow me to meet men I wouldnt otherwise meet but usually i dont fancy them or they are married or shifty. Im totally fed up. I really need a hobby or something. Its hard to get out and friends are getting more and more unrelaible especially when a man pays them any attention - they cancel all social arrangements. Im sick of waiting for them to break up so that i can go out and even then they wallow in self pity. I still want to find someone also - as sooner or later i am going to be the sole single person in my age range of mates - i will then have to hang around with younger mates and this is not fun. Has anyone tried dating agencies? Do the same people that go online use agencies? the fees are quite high but they promise to find you a professional (and on joining they do financial checks on members). Surely this is better then a lying fantsist on the online sites ??? Do they work? has anyone tried them? All i do know is that even dating seems to have become subject to the credit crunch as there is noone out there. The only issue is you don't neccesarily see a photo before meeting, which i think may be tricky. Any comments welcome.
Tony T Posted October 28, 2008 Posted October 28, 2008 I'm glad your fed up with online dating. Now you can go about finding nice people the way humans have done it for millions of years. WOW!!!
LoveDeluxe78 Posted October 28, 2008 Posted October 28, 2008 I'm glad your fed up with online dating. Now you can go about finding nice people the way humans have done it for millions of years. WOW!!! A little condescending there, Tony, but really true!!!! I love meeting people the offline way even if it doesn't pan out into anything. Sometimes a simple hi, little conversations at the coffee shop, post office, little things can make your day that much better!
tanbark813 Posted October 28, 2008 Posted October 28, 2008 I tried a dating agency once and it was a total waste of money. You're better off with match.com.
Author so gutted Posted October 28, 2008 Author Posted October 28, 2008 I'm glad your fed up with online dating. Now you can go about finding nice people the way humans have done it for millions of years. WOW!!! Nice people ? where exactly? Online dating came about for a reason did it not? Not all of us have the confidence to chat to strangers that easily and unless you are a jordan lookalike the men dont want to know.
Author so gutted Posted October 28, 2008 Author Posted October 28, 2008 I tried a dating agency once and it was a total waste of money. You're better off with match.com. what was the issue? quality of people? i dont find online dating to work at all. Either the pictures are misleading, the man has lied about his job/wife/kids or they are jsut dodgy full stop. at least with an agency they have verified that this person is X and has a job....so its really down to attraction only? it whittles some of the factors out?
tanbark813 Posted October 28, 2008 Posted October 28, 2008 what was the issue? quality of people? i dont find online dating to work at all. Either the pictures are misleading, the man has lied about his job/wife/kids or they are jsut dodgy full stop. at least with an agency they have verified that this person is X and has a job....so its really down to attraction only? it whittles some of the factors out? Well it's a little embarrassing to give details since I was basically a retard but this was also years ago when I was much more naive. The agency I signed up with promised 10 matches for $1000. They ask you all kinds of questions about yourself and what you're looking for. Then you sit back and wait for them to establish the matches. They call you up about a potential match and if the person sounds like someone you'd be interested in and the other person is interested in you based on their info then you each get the other's contact info and take it from there. I only ended up getting 3 or 4 setups from them, only 1 of which I was attracted to. They don't really pay attention much to what you say you want, or at least they didn't in my case. After a couple months I got a letter saying they got bought by some other company and my matches would be transferred over and that was the last time I ever heard from them. I was so disappointed with the whole experience that I didn't even bother to try to recoup some of the money. I've done some boneheaded things in my life but signing up with that agency would make the highlights reel. With match (or other comparable sites) at least you have more control over who you're meeting up with and it's not even remotely as expensive.
Green Posted October 29, 2008 Posted October 29, 2008 Well it's a little embarrassing to give details since I was basically a retard but this was also years ago when I was much more naive. The agency I signed up with promised 10 matches for $1000. They ask you all kinds of questions about yourself and what you're looking for. Then you sit back and wait for them to establish the matches. They call you up about a potential match and if the person sounds like someone you'd be interested in and the other person is interested in you based on their info then you each get the other's contact info and take it from there. I only ended up getting 3 or 4 setups from them, only 1 of which I was attracted to. They don't really pay attention much to what you say you want, or at least they didn't in my case. After a couple months I got a letter saying they got bought by some other company and my matches would be transferred over and that was the last time I ever heard from them. I was so disappointed with the whole experience that I didn't even bother to try to recoup some of the money. I've done some boneheaded things in my life but signing up with that agency would make the highlights reel. With match (or other comparable sites) at least you have more control over who you're meeting up with and it's not even remotely as expensive. thats an awsome story... I have to screw up atleast three times to blow that much money
Author so gutted Posted October 29, 2008 Author Posted October 29, 2008 Can you really tarr all of the agencies with the same brush? I know what you mean tho, they cannot understand or crae about what your attracted to. Im beginning to think that many of my peers/other out there that are coupled up are compromising a LOT of factors. How else can they be settled and me struggle this much? I have had one date 14 years ago that i met in the normal way - all the others online. I do not consider myself to be unattractive/large yet the real world is not yielding any results.
tanbark813 Posted October 29, 2008 Posted October 29, 2008 Can you really tarr all of the agencies with the same brush? Not really and it may be unfair to do so. But that being said I'd still never try a dating agency again. Paying $50 for match and having it not work is a lot different than paying $1000 and having it not work. For 20x the money it should be that much better and IME it wasn't any better--and I'd say it was worse--than just using an online site.
Shygirl15 Posted October 29, 2008 Posted October 29, 2008 Duh, dating is becoming a really serious business these days. Dating agencies? That sounds way too serious than I would like it to be.
Vertex Posted October 29, 2008 Posted October 29, 2008 A family friend tried a dating agency and wound up wasting quite a bit of money. Totally regrets it. Really, what Tan said is pretty spot on: You pay a whole lot more for something that doesn't really yield much additional, if any, benefit than online dating. That same sum of money could probably be put to much better uses.
CommitmentPhobe Posted October 29, 2008 Posted October 29, 2008 A little condescending there, Tony, but really true!!!! I love meeting people the offline way even if it doesn't pan out into anything. Sometimes a simple hi, little conversations at the coffee shop, post office, little things can make your day that much better! Yeah and catching that initial glint in the eye and getting the spark, and the smile, couldn't give that up!
Jilly Bean Posted October 29, 2008 Posted October 29, 2008 Ive personally never used a dating agency, but I do believe there are some quality ones out there. Remember - dating services preceded OLD. I think for many of them, the women don't pay, but the men do, so it could be a no-cost option.
2sure Posted October 29, 2008 Posted October 29, 2008 I did both OLD and used a service. I had success with both. Both are excellent sources to use for meeting people IF you use them the right way. Initially with OLD I was not meeting men I connected with, so I ended up with the service. The service screened the potential dates so well that each guy I met had at least very real potential to be a match with me. The service taught me how to screen. So, I used my new found skills and went back to the more reasonably priced OLD. By focusing on screening and weeding them out - I had much more fun. Even with guys I knew I wasnt going to date again, the dates were fun. I eventually met my H this way.
Lucky_One Posted October 29, 2008 Posted October 29, 2008 My sister married a guy she met online, and someone in my book club is getting married in May to a guy she met online. Super nice guys - and girls! Have you tried speed dating? I have always thought that seemed fun, and would do it if I were not in a R. Grab a single GF and go do that one night. Some people on here have really liked it, and some people have not. You also may want to take a hard look at your profile. There could be something there that is attracting a different sort of man than you are looking for. Try PMing it to some of the women here who have had good results with OLD. And remember - treat initial dating as it is meant to be - fun. Just fun. It's getting to know a stranger in a deeper way, and doesn't mean a commitment. It just means fun.
SUFIA Posted October 29, 2008 Posted October 29, 2008 intrested in you my name is sufia i am a young beautiful girl with full of love and carely also romantic,well i saw your profile today in network.tubely.net and i love it,i think we can click together please i will like you to email back through my email adderss thus:([email protected]) please i will like you to use your email adderss to contact me directly to my emailbox.atdesame time i will show you my photo and you also know more about me. thank for your understanding. [email protected]
BikerBeagle Posted October 29, 2008 Posted October 29, 2008 My initial impression is that anyone spending $1000+ on a dating agency is just a *little bit* too interested (desperate) in 'finding' someone (but, then again, the same could be said for anyone spending any amount for an online dating service). The best way is still to get out there, do something interesting and fun (even if it's by yourself) and meet people.
tanbark813 Posted October 29, 2008 Posted October 29, 2008 The best way is still to get out there, do something interesting and fun (even if it's by yourself) and meet people. I'm not sure why people think it's one or the other. You can do both. Meeting people while going out and using an online dating service at the same time maximizes your results, IMO.
2sure Posted October 29, 2008 Posted October 29, 2008 I get why you might have that impression...but really, for me and obviously for many others - OLD and services are practical. The screening alone was way worth it. Before that, I was dating guys I met at clubs, functions, through friends, etc...but usually found out 2 or three dates into it that , even if I found them physically attractive, we were far from compatable. Also, I would need to mention that when I was using them - I wasnt just looking to date, I was looking for a partner. So, it was like having a personal shopper to eliminate the crap.
Author so gutted Posted October 30, 2008 Author Posted October 30, 2008 I dont think they are the same as online dating because online dating requires a lot of screening on your part and even after all the questioning in the world, all the facebook and myscreen investigations the person can still lie!! The good agencies do financial and credit checks - surely that is a good idea? so if he is a lorry driver pretending to be a CEO of that lorry firm you know?
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