Francesco Posted October 28, 2008 Posted October 28, 2008 So, in my earlier posts I told everyone how I dated a girl for over 3 years. I was completely in love with her, even transferred colleges for her, but she eventually left me. This was over a year ago; and now we are both at the same small college, have a class together 4 days a week, but never speak. We went NC for months, and then she came here and for the first few weeks I was fine with NC. She reached out, we ended up studying together, and I thought we could possibly be friends. Studying with her was great, it was the first time I had sat down with her and talked since our break up a year ago. But over a month has passed since we studied and we haven't spoken. 4 days a week I walk into a class of 20 people, sit down for an hour, and leave without looking in her direction. She does the same. I see her at parties, in the cafeteria, and walking around campus...but both of us look away. Ive tried saying hey and having a brief conversation, but it always ends up being kind of awkward. Lately Ive thought about transferring back to my old college. I just want to get away from it all. Seeing her with other guys is too much for me. Its just hard to see someone you loved and knew so well for so long and you cant even speak. I didnt see her face for 11 months, and now I see her everyday and its literally the hardest thing I've had to deal with. Do you think leaving this college would mean I was running away from my problems, or do you think its the healthiest way to deal with them? Any input is helpful.
silent angel Posted October 28, 2008 Posted October 28, 2008 I think there is no right or wrong here, you only have to do what feels right for you. Staying isn't helping you move on, in fact all it does is remind you what you have lost. Leaving may fell like the easy way out, but feelings are very fragile and having this break you a little more each day will only make the scars last longer. Personally I would say you will move on quicker if you go back to your old college. You're not running away, you're fixing what hurts and that's seeing her every day. Good luck.
lofi_tokyo Posted October 28, 2008 Posted October 28, 2008 Its really a shame you and her are not on talking terms. It sounded like when the two of you hung out it was okay times. It sounds to me though like maybe you still have feelings for her. That probably creeped her out a little bit. If thats the case, I would suggest just keep on ignoring her - if you see her in the cafeteria, go elsewhere, if you see her anywhere outside class, avoid her if you need to. If you don't have feelings for her, then I'd keep trying at the friendship... sometimes its awkward at first, but all it takes is someone to really commit to re-breaking the ice to get the ball moving again. Who knows.
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