hardluckloser Posted October 27, 2008 Posted October 27, 2008 I am a mess, or so I think I am. Please don't laugh, we met and married 18 hours later. Its only been 4 1/2 months and 2 weeks ago she left. I noticed for 2 months she wasn't the same. I asked her everyday how she was and how work was and she never gave me anything but a fine. She didn't shower for a week or more, just worked and slept. I know she missed her home, and offered we move back, she only said we couldn;t afford it. The day after she left, she signed a new lease here and didn't go home. What is her thinking? My friend thinks she met a rich lawyer, since she works with them everyday. I had a great career and money at one point and hope she didnt leave me for that reason. But 4 days after she left she came to get a bag of clothes and said, I'm not happy. I said I know, and thats why I've been trying to get you to talk to me. Nothing. A week later I saw her at her second job, where I work as well a few days a week and she said to me, did you eat, they have food upstairs. @ weeks and nothing else except her claiming herself as single yesterday on facebook, and myspace. Very immature? Or has she just moved on. My friend, a young female as well at work, said she either has found someone and moved on or just wanted to hurt you with teh comments on myspace. Marriage is the most sacred thing in the world and even though it was so quick I still feel the way I did. I know I havent provided for her like I should have, but I am trying. Am i going to be surprised with divorce papers or does she need time? My head tells me shes gone because I was weak, and my heart only remembers the look in her eyes when we met and said I do. Is love less important than security, we had a rough start with finance since we moved but both finally started working and the day she got her fulltime job, the day of her first paycheck is the day she left.......I miss her, should I?
Owl Posted October 27, 2008 Posted October 27, 2008 Well...there's no way to know at the moment if it was the lack of financial security or what that caused her to leave. You need to figure out exactly what it was. If she was/is involved with someone else, that requires a lot of communication. Take a look at her cell phone usage, computer usage, etc...odds are high you'll find she's contacting one person a LOT. THEN you'll know that the real "reason" behind this. Start snooping...get to the bottom of whatever the problem is. Then people will be able to help you by posting some specific advice. The real problem you're going to face here is this...at only 5 months into a relationship with you, she doesn't sound like she's very emotionally 'invested' in the marriage. There's little foundation for you to draw her back with...little history to show her how good things can be. You're going to face a harder situation trying to reconcile this than a marriage with a longer duration. Just being honest with you, my friend.
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