Ruby Slippers Posted October 27, 2008 Share Posted October 27, 2008 ...and I don't know if it's such a good thing. I am a musician myself, so it makes perfect sense. I have been broken up for a month and a half and am COMMITTED to being single for at least a year. I really want to be introspective and look at my bad patterns and accomplish certain goals before I get involved again. But I met this cuuuuuuute and supersmart musician recently, and one of his songs (a breakup song, actually, but somewhat dark and tortured rather than sad) has me kinda swoony. It's very well-written and just RAW, without being painful to listen to. haha He loves my stuff, too, but I am trying to keep things fun and creative, rather than flirty and sparks-flying-y. I think maybe this "type" is not good for me. Musicians can be such flakes. But I'm not a flake! Ugh. Stay away, cute music boy!!! I am starting to work on my own solo album (started some collaborative projects in the past, but as I said, musicians are flaky), and it's inevitable that I will have many cute musicians coming over to record. I must be strong! Link to post Share on other sites
Vertex Posted October 27, 2008 Share Posted October 27, 2008 Making music owns. Go for it, lol. Link to post Share on other sites
Miranda1 Posted October 27, 2008 Share Posted October 27, 2008 I love music boys, too! They always seem more sensitive and romantic! Link to post Share on other sites
SunshineGirlMo Posted October 27, 2008 Share Posted October 27, 2008 Musicians can be flaky... But musicians can be deeper than anyone else too. My man is a drummer and it is hotttt. LOL. See where it goes, trust it. Link to post Share on other sites
Rooster_DAR Posted October 27, 2008 Share Posted October 27, 2008 Us musician guys sometimes get a bad rap. Were around women all the time, so we seem like insensitive male sluts. Of course we have to maintain somewhat of a "bad boy" persona, it goes with the image. Ruby, what kind of music do you do? Do you have a site where I can listen to some of your material? Cheers! Link to post Share on other sites
Shygirl15 Posted October 27, 2008 Share Posted October 27, 2008 Us musician guys sometimes get a bad rap. Were around women all the time, so we seem like insensitive male sluts. Of course we have to maintain somewhat of a "bad boy" persona, it goes with the image. Ruby, what kind of music do you do? Do you have a site where I can listen to some of your material? Cheers! No longer IT Director/Engineer?? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ruby Slippers Posted October 27, 2008 Author Share Posted October 27, 2008 I love music boys, too! They always seem more sensitive and romantic! Yes, but stay away from the guitar players! haha I tend to get with bass players, who seem to be a little more grounded (kind of like bass in music!) than guitar players, but my last guy was a guitar player and totally fit the stereotypes -- showy and all over the place, but so sexy! Ruby, what kind of music do you do? Do you have a site where I can listen to some of your material? Since I run my own business, I like to keep a low profile for personal and creative stuff online. I used to have the same username wherever I went and attracted some fanboy stalkers. lol But I will PM you some links. I decided last night that I am NOT going to allow anything more than friendship with this guy to develop. I am doing really well for myself right now with these personal goals (including writing and recording my own music again). He can be a great music friend for now, and he will be good motivation for me to shine musically. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ruby Slippers Posted October 27, 2008 Author Share Posted October 27, 2008 No longer IT Director/Engineer?? If I had a dollar for every male musician I know who quit his engineering job to record and mix the album (or crammed it in on side at the expense of everything else), I'd be a rich girl! Link to post Share on other sites
Vertex Posted October 27, 2008 Share Posted October 27, 2008 What about drummers? I'm such a beat freak. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ruby Slippers Posted October 27, 2008 Author Share Posted October 27, 2008 ^ Maybe SunshineGrl can help us out on that one. I have not dated a drummer, but a close friend of mine is engaged to one, and I have some drummer friends. I have seen a wide range of personalities in drummers, but in my experience a lot of them are perfectionists and somewhat reserved. They get to let loose behind the kit. They almost always have great taste in music, too. Very discriminating. My old drummer (in another city) used to lend me stacks of CDs, saying in his typically man-of-few-words way, "You need to hear this." And it was always amazing stuff that I felt I'd been missing all my life! I also get the comment that I "have great rhythm" a lot, so drummers usually seem to like my stuff. I love drummers! Link to post Share on other sites
tanbark813 Posted October 27, 2008 Share Posted October 27, 2008 Musicians can be such flakes. That's the stereotype but most of the guys I've played with long-term were/are very reliable. I also think you're going to overlook your stay-single-for-a-year rule and get with this new dude. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ruby Slippers Posted October 27, 2008 Author Share Posted October 27, 2008 ^ Noooooooo! He reminds me WAY too much of my ex. Even among his friends, there seems to be an analog to each of the guys from my ex's circle, right down to the intense and hyperintellectual control freak who hovers over his laptop making miniscule tweaks to the subtlest parts, knowing he's right on the brink of perfection. I think this type is somewhat my male equivalent. Maybe in the future I will try to get past the louder ones of the group into this more cerebral center. Presently, I am inclined to avoid the attention-seekers with the great arms who love to play guitar shirtless. hehehe Link to post Share on other sites
Rooster_DAR Posted October 27, 2008 Share Posted October 27, 2008 No longer IT Director/Engineer?? IT Director is my full time gig, writing and composing hard rock is my real ambition. I probably won't be playing in a band much, I'm just writing and recording music because I love it so much. I do plan on trying to gain some royalties by selling off some of my music is the opportunity arise though. Ha! Link to post Share on other sites
sumdude Posted October 27, 2008 Share Posted October 27, 2008 Yes, but stay away from the guitar players! haha I tend to get with bass players, who seem to be a little more grounded (kind of like bass in music!) than guitar players, but my last guy was a guitar player and totally fit the stereotypes -- showy and all over the place, but so sexy! lol... been playing guitar and writing since I was 12 now I'm 40. Have the day job as an engineer and still gig a few times a month. Somehow I managed to keep the passion AND be grounded too... Hard thing is finding a non-flaky woman who gets it... Y'know most of the best professional musicians I know are also the best people.. so much soul.. I imagine one day I'll probably end up with another musician, who else will understand or put up with the odd hours and everything else? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ruby Slippers Posted October 27, 2008 Author Share Posted October 27, 2008 Somehow I managed to keep the passion AND be grounded too... Hard thing is finding a non-flaky woman who gets it... That is awesome!! I actually think the perfect guy for me would be an engineer (or some sort of hard scientist, like an astrophysicist!!) for work and highly creative musician/songwriter/composer for fun. I bring a cocktail of brains and creativity to the table, and I need that reciprocated. Also, I love science and love having long discussions about it with my man. And we can write science songs. This new friend reminds me of my ex in that, though he seems like a great guy, I'm not sure he's really on my level intellectually. I think I was giving him too much credit when I said "supersmart". Also like my ex, he's very attractive and magnetic, but I get the sense that he's also kind of flighty. And I don't want that anymore. That's not good for anything serious. I want someone more grounded and earthy, deliberate and methodical. I like to have that anchor. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ruby Slippers Posted October 28, 2008 Author Share Posted October 28, 2008 I like: What do you call the guy who hangs out with musicians? The drummer. Link to post Share on other sites
CommitmentPhobe Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 I actually think the perfect guy for me would be an engineer (or some sort of hard scientist, like an astrophysicist!!) for work and highly creative musician/songwriter/composer for fun. Hmmm, I'm a scientist, musician in my part time. Not sure why your ideal man fits that description, you have some issues !! Link to post Share on other sites
lynn650 Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 I'm a classical musician by profession, and I have noticed a major difference in dating musicians as opposed to non-musicians. The only musicians I have dated are classical or jazz musicians, but some have had rock-bands on the side. In my experience, musicians are far more passionate and better in bed Link to post Share on other sites
johan Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 I have a thing for musicians......and I don't know if it's such a good thing. What kind of thing is it? Can you describe it? Is it an instrument? Musicians like surprises. Link to post Share on other sites
sumdude Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 I'm a classical musician by profession, and I have noticed a major difference in dating musicians as opposed to non-musicians. The only musicians I have dated are classical or jazz musicians, but some have had rock-bands on the side. In my experience, musicians are far more passionate and better in bed I've never dated another musician... but I sure have been curious.. something about having good rhythm and knowing when to go from pp to fff at the same time. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Ruby Slippers Posted October 30, 2008 Author Share Posted October 30, 2008 Hmmm, I'm a scientist, musician in my part time. Not sure why your ideal man fits that description, you have some issues !! Clearly! lmao In my experience, musicians are far more passionate and better in bed Yes! And there is nothing hotter than playing music with your man -- or especially WRITING music with him! That passion and creativity are vital to me. I don't think I can ever go back. One ex and I wrote and recorded 80% of an album together, and all our friends were so swept up in it and we had this huge online following. But then he got flaky, and the project fell through. Bleh! I've never dated another musician... but I sure have been curious.. something about having good rhythm and knowing when to go from pp to fff at the same time.I've been the first musician girlfriend for every guy I've dated. I guess we are pretty rare. And it always arouses this huge tidal wave of passion from them. Not to toot my horn, but every guy I've been with seriously has told me I'm "the love of his life" and he "never felt so intensely for someone before". (That doesn't mean they have what it takes to make me happy, though!) So, you might wanna look into the datin' a musician thing. I am over my teeny crush, I think. The guy's a little younger than me, and he just seems very immature. He's cute, and I think he has a lot of promise musically, but once I get back out there again, I am setting my sights on an actual, you know, GROWN UP. I have always dated men my own age or just a couple years older, but I am considering changing that habit in the future. Next time, I want a MAN. Link to post Share on other sites
Vertex Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 How old are you? Link to post Share on other sites
CommitmentPhobe Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 Yes! And there is nothing hotter than playing music with your man -- or especially WRITING music with him! That passion and creativity are vital to me. I don't think I can ever go back. One ex and I wrote and recorded 80% of an album together, and all our friends were so swept up in it and we had this huge online following. But then he got flaky, and the project fell through. Bleh! I have to say I could never do something like that, she'd want to murder me after a while, I'm a difficult sort when it comes to music, I don't take criticism very well, especially being a prima donna frontman, I only listen to the audience feedback I also have this nasty habit of writing, rewriting, rewriting, going bleh and chucking..... I have driven people mad with this I'd also have to be miles better than her, or at least she would have to make me believe that, I'm competitive like that As you can tell the bands I've been in have always been the more explosive argumentative type than the calm reasoned ones. Punch ups 5 minutes before we're on etc. etc. Link to post Share on other sites
Freedom Now Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 I'm dating the lead singer who also writes the lyrics and music for his group. And, I studied music therapy in college and play the piano myself.... So....thumbs up to musicians! Link to post Share on other sites
kizik Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 I'm a singer-songwriter (quite talented, I think), and have nobody fawning over me, etc. I get really frustrated with the whole "musicians are such players/flakes" thing, b/c I can't get any action to save my life. I'd like to believe that some day, some woman will be amazed with my sh*t, but it's like trying to imagine a new color. Point being that, like my favorite musician Elliott Smith, a lot of it is sitting in a room writing, playing and singing. The original spirit of it is entirely self-driven and definitely not fan-oriented. There's no glory or fame or p*ssy in it, unless you happen to get signed and famous. So for every guy who plays a terrible bass in some sh*tty shoegaze band, there are many others like myself who do it in the true spirit... who do it not for anything other than the fact that - sometimes - it saves us from killing ourselves. And if you're my man Smith, sometimes THAT doesn't even work. Link to post Share on other sites
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