confusedgirl85 Posted October 27, 2008 Posted October 27, 2008 Two weeks ago, my boyfriend broke up with me after 1 1/2 months of dating (its nothing, i know!). His reason was that he saw me more as a friend, and we didnt have many things in common, and he couldnt be himself around me. He said that to me out of nowhere, i thought we were doing just fine getting to know each other but anyways we ended it. About a week ago i got a call from him since we broke up, just to say hi, etc... three days ago we chatted about regular stuff and he said that we should go to the movies someday, i told him yeah we'll see later.... the next day he called me again just to say hi and just talk about anything. When he broke up with me, he did hurt me...but deep down i wanna get back with him, even though all my friends keep telling me that i better not be friends with him... So i want your opinion, should i be friends with him again? Stop talking with him? Or what?? I really dont think he wants to get back... jsut be my friend, but should i?
murphomatic Posted October 27, 2008 Posted October 27, 2008 Seems a little bit odd that he'd break up with you, stating the reason that he "sees you as more of a friend than a girlfriend", and then somewhat negates that with the statement that he "can't be himself around you". I'd think that if he truly saw you as a "friend", then being himself around you would not be such a chore. I'm not saying that people can't be friends after having a relationship, but I think it's a bit cruel when one side ends things in a way that hurts, and then add the caveat of "oh - but we can still be friends.." allowing themselves free access to you with no burden of commitment...especially when they know how the other side feels about them, and will always see more contact with them as potential "get-back-together" scenarios. If you want to be his friend - that's cool and all, but I would give it a little bit of drying-out time. And let him know straight-up how you feel about it.. Just say "ya know [insert guys name here], I really did care about you, and I'm hurt and disappointed that our relationship ended after a short time period. I don't feel like we really took an honest shot at things. I need some time away from you so that I can really think about the potential of us being friends, whether it will work out, or whether my heart will break again every time I see you." Give yourself a little time and space. Revisit the topic after you're not so emotionally biased and invested in a love-relationship with him. It's painful to have to look at someone all the time with hope in your eyes, never to have it returned.
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