kimflute26 Posted October 26, 2008 Posted October 26, 2008 A little background info: My boyfriend and I have been together for just over a year (we are both 19 years old at the same university). We love each other very much and generally get along amazingly well. One issue that we do have is that since he is always so busy it's difficult for us to find time to spend together. He often will say that he'll come over on a certain day, but then by the end of the day if he feels overwhelmed by his homework he cancels. Now, of course I try to be understanding about that because he DOES come over when he can and I know that he's not just blowing me off (he really is quite busy with lots of homework). He tends to be pretty scatterbrained and gets lost in his work and projects very easily, and as a result he can be pretty forgetful too. He's the kind of guy who will see me the next day after I was angry with him the night before and run up to me to give me a big hug, as though he completely forgot that we hadn't made up yet! This leads to the most recent problem: Today I sent him an email about something relating to the two of us. I asked him if he would read it and respond today and he promised he would. That was several hours ago and it's now 11:06.... I'm getting nervous that he has forgotten (it woudn't be too out of the ordinary). The thing is, if he doesn't repond I am 100% sure it is because he simply forgot. I know him too well and there is NO reason at all for me to think that he has blown me off... he's just not the type. But at the same time, I feel like if someone makes a promise they need to find a way to keep it! So what do I do? It makes things harder that I KNOW he cares for me quite a bit and that he's not doing this on purpose... but it still hurts of course, and I don't know what I should do every time something like this comes up. I don't want to have to stop believing him when he tells me something. And I've got this nagging feeling that it seems like he should do something to make sure he remembers to do what he promised, if I'm that important to him. Any advice??
Island Girl Posted October 26, 2008 Posted October 26, 2008 If I was in your situation I would not call or e-mail. I would speak to him normally if he calls, and then when we make plans -- I'd cancel on him. A couple of times would do the trick and when he mentions that he hasn't been able to see me I would tell him I can't count on him to do what he says he is going to do so I make other plans. Either he'd make me a priority (in my experience it has always been this one) or wouldn't and he'd get replaced.
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