Time of year: Hard one.

[amandaparker503]

Humm.

Just writing to stop myself breaking my NC.

5 weeks of NC on my side, ok i see him twice a week and around this small small town, but I just keep myself to myself, i say hello and goodbye and that is it.

 

On Thursday it will be 2 years to the day that we first met and sorry to sound soft, but it was lust at first sight!

I am so tempted to remind him and i am just needing some words to stop me!

 

This time last year , we did the whole Halloween thing, then fireworks then Christmas...i have a thousand memories in my mind at the moment. The nights are dark now, winter has arrived and i miss being cosy with my boyfriend , i am not looking forward to Christmas without him and seeing the new year in without him.

Its a hard time of year for me as i have so many memories due to our relationship starting at this time of year.

 

It hurts even more knowing he is with someone else and enjoying this time with her.

I know it shouldnt bother me , but it does! I dont even know who she is,i have never met her, i have never seen him with her and i am even thinking he lied to me as i see him all the time and he is never ever with her!!

Not that it is my business or my control anymore, but i cant help but wonder.

 

Maybe that is just my needs , my lonelyness , but my mind is telling me i miss him and want him and want to contact him and try and break the ice with him

 

Can i also just add, that in the past week , he has actually started talking to me in the kickboxing club(he is the instructor and was ignoring me for weeks)

Do you think that because i am now totally getting on with my life, i am happier and i really am happier, i am laughing in the club, i sometimes dont even speak to him to say or goodbye, (i am not rude or childish, he has been treating me like this for months, i have always said hi and goodbye and he never ever responded) as i am to busy chatting with my friends, do you think that maybe to him i am now more SAFE! to approach, he can see I am ok now and moving on.

 

I am not 100 per cent ok, but i would never let him know that now.

 

I hope one day i will give up hope completly. I think i am half way there , its just sometimes a slight memory makes me feel like my hard work in moving on is just getting me nowhere!

 

Thanks for letting me clear my mind , its better than contacting hiim x

[UnamedSeven]

Humm.

Just writing to stop myself breaking my NC.

5 weeks of NC on my side, ok i see him twice a week and around this small small town, but I just keep myself to myself, i say hello and goodbye and that is it.

 

On Thursday it will be 2 years to the day that we first met and sorry to sound soft, but it was lust at first sight!

I am so tempted to remind him and i am just needing some words to stop me!

 

This time last year , we did the whole Halloween thing, then fireworks then Christmas...i have a thousand memories in my mind at the moment. The nights are dark now, winter has arrived and i miss being cosy with my boyfriend , i am not looking forward to Christmas without him and seeing the new year in without him.

Its a hard time of year for me as i have so many memories due to our relationship starting at this time of year.

 

It hurts even more knowing he is with someone else and enjoying this time with her.

I know it shouldnt bother me , but it does! I dont even know who she is,i have never met her, i have never seen him with her and i am even thinking he lied to me as i see him all the time and he is never ever with her!!

Not that it is my business or my control anymore, but i cant help but wonder.

 

Maybe that is just my needs , my lonelyness , but my mind is telling me i miss him and want him and want to contact him and try and break the ice with him

 

Can i also just add, that in the past week , he has actually started talking to me in the kickboxing club(he is the instructor and was ignoring me for weeks)

Do you think that because i am now totally getting on with my life, i am happier and i really am happier, i am laughing in the club, i sometimes dont even speak to him to say or goodbye, (i am not rude or childish, he has been treating me like this for months, i have always said hi and goodbye and he never ever responded) as i am to busy chatting with my friends, do you think that maybe to him i am now more SAFE! to approach, he can see I am ok now and moving on.

 

I am not 100 per cent ok, but i would never let him know that now.

 

I hope one day i will give up hope completly. I think i am half way there , its just sometimes a slight memory makes me feel like my hard work in moving on is just getting me nowhere!

 

Thanks for letting me clear my mind , its better than contacting hiim x

That is a very good possibility that he thinks that everything is ok with you, and he feels that he can talk to you without any harmful words or bringing up what "was". Instead, he may start to get back a mere friendship with you. If thats the case, its up to you whether or not you want him to be in your life again.

Just be warned that he can hurt your heart again. I was deeply by 2 people within the last year and i'm ending a friendship the next time i talk to her. The pain is unbearable.