bhweller Posted October 23, 2008 Posted October 23, 2008 This is a question for women to answer. I want a translation from womanese into something simple enough for me to understand. After 6 months in a relationship, a guy initiates an honest talk about the future with his girlfriend. He asks the following questions : 1. are you happy right now in the relationship ? She says yes. 2. do you think we could still be together in 6 months ? She says yes. 3. what are the chances we will be together in six months ? SHE SAYS 50/50. Now keep in mind he put her on the spot a bit, she didn't have any warning these questions were coming. Should the guy be worried about the 50/50 answer ?
Lovegod Posted October 23, 2008 Posted October 23, 2008 A woman cannot be in a secure relationship with an insecure man. If he feels the need to ask these questions, he's insecure. Women want to feel secure in their relationship. So I guess the answer is yes, he should be worried about the 50/50 answer.
Lizzie60 Posted October 23, 2008 Posted October 23, 2008 This is a question for women to answer. I want a translation from womanese into something simple enough for me to understand. After 6 months in a relationship, a guy initiates an honest talk about the future with his girlfriend. He asks the following questions : 1. are you happy right now in the relationship ? She says yes. 2. do you think we could still be together in 6 months ? She says yes. 3. what are the chances we will be together in six months ? SHE SAYS 50/50. Now keep in mind he put her on the spot a bit, she didn't have any warning these questions were coming. Should the guy be worried about the 50/50 answer ? I agree with her.. it's 50/50 .. no one can predict the future. Come on dude.. stop asking questions like that.. I'd be annoyed.. It's a bit 'looserish' to ask questions like that.. it demonstrate a lack of confidence.. and that's a huge turn-off for women in general.
Balthazar Posted October 23, 2008 Posted October 23, 2008 I agree with the other posters. You shouldn't be asking such questions in the first place. Enjoy the relationship, build and invest in it if you feel the woman is worth it. Be the best you can be and don't worry so much! Cheers,
BannaBee57 Posted October 23, 2008 Posted October 23, 2008 If he kept asking me questions like that his chances would be more like 30/70...not in his favour. I don't like being badgered in my relationships.
Author bhweller Posted October 23, 2008 Author Posted October 23, 2008 Ok fair enough. So, how do I recover ? Do I say I'm sorry for asking stupid questions or do I pretend like it never happened and try to be a challenge again ?
Lizzie60 Posted October 23, 2008 Posted October 23, 2008 Ok fair enough. So, how do I recover ? Do I say I'm sorry for asking stupid questions or do I pretend like it never happened and try to be a challenge again ? Saying you're sorry would be OK.. and not talk about it anymore is also OK.. whatever.. but DO NOT annoy her with any more questions like that.
CommitmentPhobe Posted October 23, 2008 Posted October 23, 2008 What Lizzie said.. voice of experience. Incidentally, why did you feel the need to ask in the first place?
Author bhweller Posted October 23, 2008 Author Posted October 23, 2008 I have a whole other thread about that. "Insecure about relationship, we are both in our 30's".
Lizzie60 Posted October 23, 2008 Posted October 23, 2008 I have a whole other thread about that. "Insecure about relationship, we are both in our 30's". Thanks CP... You're in your 30s... man... come on.. I thought you were about 18.. you need to strenghten up your confidence.. big time.. If the woman really likes you.. you don't need to worry and harrass her with 'dumb' questions.. she won't go anywhere..
Author bhweller Posted October 23, 2008 Author Posted October 23, 2008 I know its silly. I felt like a schoolboy again. But I am getting older and I don't want to waste time either.
Lizzie60 Posted October 23, 2008 Posted October 23, 2008 I know its silly. I felt like a schoolboy again. But I am getting older and I don't want to waste time either. Well if you don't want to waste time.. then be 'serious' otherwise you'll waste your time and hers..
ChickenAce Posted October 24, 2008 Posted October 24, 2008 In my case, shamefully, I asked her something like that more than once. I feel as if I wanted a blueprint of the future in order to make plans. There is no problem in asking something like this. After all we are people and we want to know what the other side is thinking don't we? But it is also good to guage for yourself what you observe aswell. If you observe good things and bad things you should make your own notes about it. People don't always tell the truth and sometimes as in my own situation I was caught off guard dreaming for the answer I wanted rather than accepting the answer was there. I guess as people my relationships with women have shown me that they are independent of me as much as I am independent of them. I don't want to force something EVER coz i learn its a big world and everyone's got to be who they are and it is a big lesson learning about what others want and also an indication of what you want. I think everyone got ideals of their own and happiness of their own, its unique its a gift which is our personal desires. When 'they' talk about compatibility, I realise now its a lot of things. You got the mental attraction, emotional attraction, physical attraction and the love. I dont want a woman just to have one element out of all of the above for me. Sometimes its a money thing sometimes its a lonely thing you know, its usually complicated.
Lovegod Posted October 24, 2008 Posted October 24, 2008 So, how do I recover ? Easy. Quit asking the questions and quit being so insecure about your relationship. Remember, women should NOT be the source of your happiness. They shoud only add to your overall happiness. And if she decides to leave you, there are more women out there, and there's likely one who's better than her. Do I say I'm sorry for asking stupid questions No. That'll make the whole situation even more annoying. Being insecure about the relationship and then apologizing for being insecure will re-inforce the fact that you're insecure. As for the whole "being a challenge" thing, you don't need to do that once you're in a relationship. Instead, be spontaneous and slightly unpredictable; it will add excitement to the relationship and make it more interesting.
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