LoveLace Posted October 23, 2008 Posted October 23, 2008 It's been a while, but I'm back as always LS'ers...I hope everyone is doing well. The "C" saga continues...saxophone man...and friend... Things got crazy although we still kept in touch, we finally went out again last night. Ever since the night he told me about "sord of seeing someone" (or a casual relationship as he described it), I vowed we are just good friends and nothing more. No reason why I can't still go watch him play, etc. Well I knew the vacation with "her" was approaching. I didn't expect to talk with him again until he returned. I had also finally told every way I felt about him, well that I think very highly of him anyway (in an email that he didn't answer)...then we chatted on the phone one night but that was small talk. I wondered if telling him my feelings freaked him out, but apparently not. Yesterday he called and said last night would be his "last night of freedom" before preparation for leaving town. And he wanted to hang out with moi. So we met for drinks and he was a the perfect gentelman as usual, paid for everything too. Talked and laughed a storm again. He even ended up playing a few songs with the band there and it was a fab time. We closed the place down, and he wanted to extend the night to a bar open even later, so we migrated for another drink. Then he had to get going because of work the next day and he drove me home. While walking to his car he placed his hand at the small of my back, the 1st feeling of "possession" if you will, that I've felt from him. When saying bye in the car, I told him to have a good trip and all. We went to hug and he said "gimmee some love" - we hugged each other tightly and I kissed his cheek. I know that we will talk or see each other when he returns. Had I not known that he was about to leave on vacation with "her", would I have reacted differently? Did he want me to kiss him? Don't friends say "gimmee some love" to each other? This whole time he's been quite the gentleman when it comes to "making moves". Did I hurt his feelings by not kissing him after he took me out? When talking, he would briefly mention things about the vacation he's about to go on, then I would refrain from asking questions or try to change the subject. If I had this guy, I could not share him. He's definitely putting effort into spending time with me now; I know that much, but nothing more...I hope he understands my reluctance...and I hope I have not confused him. But if anyone's confused, I guess it is me. Am I giving a little too much respect towards this "casual" thing he's got, (which is also long distance) the thing that he claims he never wants to get serious? And while being such great friends already, it doesn't seem that he is trying to create another "casual" thing with me. A friendship is fragile, and so are mixed signals, so should I talk about it with him? If so, what to say?! Well thanks. Sorry sooo long.
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