4givrnt4gtr Posted October 21, 2008 Posted October 21, 2008 DOnt know what to do.... On one hand, I really love my bf. He's smart, funny, loving. On the other hand, I cant help but feel that he can be insensitive and cheap. Plus...there's always that "should I have forgiven him?" hanging over my head.... ughhh Ive posted here a few times about how sometime my so can be cheap. I try to see it as him being frugal, smart with his money but man....sometimes. Just this saturday...he asked me if i wanted to come with him to a park. He received a free ticket so he asked if i wanted to go. I said yes and sat we were all ready to go when he asked if i checked the price of my ticket. Then said he could help me pay half of it if i wanted to . So, since ive asked about this issue before and was reminded that i shouldnt expect people to pay for me, plus i assume the entry would be expensive and thats why he wanted to help me pay half, i try to make light of it. WEll we get there, and the ticket is just $20. Again he makes a very obvious half hearted "do you want me to pay half?" comment which just ticked me off. I said no. Now...i thought about it....he isnt entirely frugal...i mean he IS planning an over $1600 trip to attend a retreat. He is just "frugal" when it comes to other people.... Then the insensitive part...after we get out of the park somehow we got into a conversation about muscles and butts. Long story short he lets me know he likes "muscular butts" and considers my butt "big". I kinda said that my butt was muscular AND big...he laughed sarcastically . When he did that I just said lets not talk about this, and he agreed saying it wasnt going to end well. Again TICKEEDDDD! On top of that I realized that all the times he mentions my "big butt" he isnt really complimenting me.... Sunday he came over to my place after visiting family, which ive noticed he doesnt like because I live in a small studio apartment (he lives in a luxury condo). He laid down on my bed and after a bit of watching tv (not cable because I cant afford it) he mentions how he had forgot how he had actually wanted to go home. AGAIN TIIIICKED!!! I told him he could still go if he wanted to...he just said "nah, im too tired to drive now" :mad: Then the kicker...I just switched birth control pills. Well, Ive had many difficulties with these things, making me sick and just miserable. We always use condoms as well but the pills are back up. In any case Sunday nite i got REALLY sick. He was with me and was very attentive. Then monday I was feeling better so i went to work. I then mentioned how I was thinking about quitting the pills...he didnt like the idea. I said that we could do natural family planning as well as keep using the condoms. WHich means we would try to avoid sex on the risky days. I even mention other alternatives. He said that it sounded good, but that "nothing beat sex" (Even if it makes me sick apparently ) Anyway, then today I was at work, talking about my friend and how she really doesnt like him. I was telling my coworker that she doesnt like him since I found out he was texting dirty stuff to some chick he met online. My coworker was completely outraged I would get back with him after that. I thought about it as well and wonder if i made the right decision... Sure things are better now than before...but still there are so many things that make me unhappy....I just dont know... What do you guys think its the right thing? continue? end it? talk about it???
Author 4givrnt4gtr Posted October 22, 2008 Author Posted October 22, 2008 AS i reread this i realized that what got me to this point was the comment that girl at work made...she made me feel like im a complete fool for trusting my SO again. I then started thinking of all these things that i posted about for reasons to break up... But then i talked to my bf...nothing major, just what we were doing tonight. And i realized that what other people think of my decision of trusting him again shouldnt matter. That the bottom line was that i love the man and he loves me as well. He might say the wrong things (and really I was even feeling silly as i was describing the whole "fat" situation), and not perfectly in touch with his sensitive side when it comes to some things. But after the frustration subsides and I put everything on a balance, he wins. So never mind...go ahead and ignore this post.
allina Posted October 22, 2008 Posted October 22, 2008 This is your place to vent, getting frustrated with your bf or being unsure doesn't mean you shouldn't post or regret it later. Good luck.
Author 4givrnt4gtr Posted October 23, 2008 Author Posted October 23, 2008 This is your place to vent, getting frustrated with your bf or being unsure doesn't mean you shouldn't post or regret it later. Good luck. Thanks, Unfortunately, right after I wrote that response I sent him a text message saying that i loved him. He responded with "too much love floating around, I lust you" I went onto ask him why not love...he said "alright, maybe a little love" But all in all...too late. Again this whole battle with me trying to decide. Long story short....discuss the situation with a group therapy.....and it was so plain and clear to me... Its over. Now how in the world am i gonna tell him. I havent been honest with him...he has no idea im unhappy.... This is so hard
Geishawhelk Posted October 23, 2008 Posted October 23, 2008 You text him and say : "Don't call us, we'll call you". Then delete him off your 'phone and block the number. delete him off facebook/my space contacts and block him, delete his e-mail addy and block him, and delete him off msn and block him. It's that simple. Which of course, doesn't mean "easy". Then, every time you feel like contacting him - come on here and post in this thread, instead.
Author 4givrnt4gtr Posted October 23, 2008 Author Posted October 23, 2008 You text him and say : "Don't call us, we'll call you". Then delete him off your 'phone and block the number. delete him off facebook/my space contacts and block him, delete his e-mail addy and block him, and delete him off msn and block him. It's that simple. Which of course, doesn't mean "easy". Then, every time you feel like contacting him - come on here and post in this thread, instead. Well, that sounds like a good idea if i had been dating him for maybe a few weeks. However we've been together for almost a year and a half, talking about marriage etc...so, yeah, I dont think thats gonna fly. Afterall, sure it didnt work. but I still like the guy.
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