lofi_tokyo Posted October 18, 2008 Posted October 18, 2008 But its so hard not to! Rawrawrawrawrawrawr. Not that I want to talk to him, mostly I just want to creep his myspace, but he hardly goes on that, so I'd be unsatisfied then probably creep something else he goes on and keep going till I talked to him, looking to feel satisfied, but hes with that new girl so I wouldnt even! In the end, NC is WAY more satisfying, I just need to remind myself of that ;p
Peter_pan Posted October 19, 2008 Posted October 19, 2008 yeh but you dont want to hold a grudge like i am. i miss her alot and i feel sad she isnt in my life we used to be there for each other in everyway
Nemo Posted October 19, 2008 Posted October 19, 2008 In the end, NC is WAY more satisfying, I like it in the end, too.
CherishG Posted October 19, 2008 Posted October 19, 2008 Hang in there Tokyo! I know it's super uber tough, but it's all we can do at this point rite?
Hersheys Posted October 19, 2008 Posted October 19, 2008 There's really no point breaking NC. It will not bring our ex's back and will only lead to further pain and confusion. I broke NC way too many times and each one only led me to heartbreak and wasted time. When I think about it now, I was happier when I was in NC than when I was in contact with my ex.
Author lofi_tokyo Posted October 19, 2008 Author Posted October 19, 2008 Hang in there Tokyo! I know it's super uber tough, but it's all we can do at this point rite? Absolutely right there Cherish Thanks all for the support! Hershey you are 100% right. It hurts being in NC, but its hurts even MORE not to be when they don't care about you like to used to. Bleh!
Konfuzion Posted October 19, 2008 Posted October 19, 2008 I have the same problem but probably worse (just a little) being that I am a hacker a while back when I was questioning my ex's loyalty I hacked into her myspace, e-mail and another site I wont mention here so I can literally log on to everything and see what she is doing and who she is talking too... Which is very difficult not to do, but when I do it I just end up feeling sad, angry, crushed, and depressed.
alwayssme Posted October 19, 2008 Posted October 19, 2008 I have the same problem but probably worse (just a little) being that I am a hacker a while back when I was questioning my ex's loyalty I hacked into her myspace, e-mail and another site I wont mention here so I can literally log on to everything and see what she is doing and who she is talking too... Which is very difficult not to do, but when I do it I just end up feeling sad, angry, crushed, and depressed. how do you hack into myspace? just wondering, i din't think that was possible
ioncebelieved Posted October 19, 2008 Posted October 19, 2008 There's really no point breaking NC. It will not bring our ex's back and will only lead to further pain and confusion. I broke NC way too many times and each one only led me to heartbreak and wasted time. When I think about it now, I was happier when I was in NC than when I was in contact with my ex. RIGHT!!! I broke NC last month after going almost three months. I did this twice in one week. At first, I was good with doing it, but a few days later in started hurting again when she did not get back in touch with me. It has been a month since I broke and still NO word from her, but I have held strong. Breaking NC is NOT GOOD!!!! Doing it only sets you back. I told myself that I made an honest attempt to get things back right with her and she has the ball in her court. It appears I may never get the ball back, but I left it with the best intentions.
Author lofi_tokyo Posted October 20, 2008 Author Posted October 20, 2008 Ewww. Totally getting anxious about NC. I want to..... creep his myspace. But I won't let myself do that! I want to jump on aim, unblock him/re-add him and see what he does... but I won't. I am finished with him, but I think, when I get bored... I totally go back to needyness, as in wanting to know what hes up to. Sadly, and as already mentioned on this thread, it hurts more to do that in the end. Must resist! OY
Konfuzion Posted October 20, 2008 Posted October 20, 2008 how do you hack into myspace? just wondering, i din't think that was possible Anything is possible, however I am sorry I will not assist nor teach someone how to hack into anything. Besides hacking is something you really have to have a passion for, and enough of a drive to learn it on your own. Ewww. Totally getting anxious about NC. I want to..... creep his myspace. But I won't let myself do that! I want to jump on aim, unblock him/re-add him and see what he does... but I won't. I am finished with him, but I think, when I get bored... I totally go back to needyness, as in wanting to know what hes up to. Sadly, and as already mentioned on this thread, it hurts more to do that in the end. Must resist! OY I think that is the exact problem I am having right now, I have been keeping myself busy with the girl I am seeing but due to life and her being sick we haven't seen each other for a week. Be strong and go out and do something you love... You will feel better little by little with everyday that passes.
JooLee Posted October 20, 2008 Posted October 20, 2008 i broke NC yesterday after 3 months! its crazy and im all hurt again. now i gotta accept that he won and im left like a fool here still missing him. what is wrong with me. why cant i see that i deserve better. im not in square one but the hurt is there... gaaahhh... i need to be strong, i need to be stronger. we will make it yah! by our own, we will make it..
Sysyphus28 Posted October 20, 2008 Posted October 20, 2008 5 weeks for me. She even called last week three times, and I couldn't bring myself to call her back to talk to her. I miss her and I think I still love her. With the holiday's coming it is even harder. I have found comfort in helping a friend through a horrible breakup...I am giving her some of the insights and strengths I've gained. I feel good helping her because I know how crappy being dumped is. My ex is "happy", she is with someone new.......it hurts so bad. SOmetimes I want to call or email or write a letter....I have so much to say. Withotu an apology from her on how she handled this....and some compassion from her, it is hard for me to "suck up my pride". I have compromised my integrity for this girl time and time again after we broke up............I held on the line thinking we would be together again. She called me when she wanted to, not when I called her, and she was probably outside the bedroom of her NEW man every time we talked........... It was embarrassing for me, I feel ashamed of my weak will and poor self-esteem. You are not put here on earth to please someone else's needs/ego. The best route for honorable reconciliation is NC. It makes sense. We are the dumpees. The people that got left. Some of us deserved it, and most of us didn't. For whatever reason we were forced to change. Now change, and take your personal power back from the person who temporarily stripped it from you. Use NC as a way to examine who you are, and why you act the way you do. Why am I dependent? Why did I let this person make me feel like dirt? WHY WHY WHY
JooLee Posted October 20, 2008 Posted October 20, 2008 well said sysyphus.. well said. it seems you're on the right route. keep it up , you'll pull through.. we'll pull through...
Sysyphus28 Posted October 20, 2008 Posted October 20, 2008 We have to pull through. We have to. Thier is no other option joolee. I havn't been working out that much. I havn't really been eating especially good. BUT I am going out and having fun, and reading books that promote growth and awareness. You have to become aware why you let yourself get hurt so deeply. Our dependency issues can be solved. We just have to use this opportunity to dive deeply and become stronger. Stay NC. If they call you are not their for them. IF they email(how are you), they already know how you are, don't answer. If text, erase it. Anything short of an apology or humbled tone of voice is un-acceptable. You are not an old dishrag. You are not someone's punching bag. You are not an emotional slave. You are a unique person who comes from different circumstances and have a different view than your ex. See yourself as an individual and seperate from your prior relationship. You will be in different relationships. Another person will surprise you and make you laugh. Another person will please you. Who cares if they regret it! Who cares if they care. You can't control other people. Help someone who needs help.
tealeafbud Posted October 20, 2008 Posted October 20, 2008 But its so hard not to! Rawrawrawrawrawrawr. Not that I want to talk to him, mostly I just want to creep his myspace, but he hardly goes on that, so I'd be unsatisfied then probably creep something else he goes on and keep going till I talked to him, looking to feel satisfied, but hes with that new girl so I wouldnt even! In the end, NC is WAY more satisfying, I just need to remind myself of that ;p Take it from someone who has broken NC a few times, it is not worth it. I've even had to say to myself "it's just not worth it, it's just not worth it" only recently. You'll heal much faster if you stay NC. But nevertheless, you have my unconditional support tokyo
Sysyphus28 Posted October 20, 2008 Posted October 20, 2008 Remember that first week after you broke up, where your head was at?! Do you want to go back thier?? Hell no I don't. I was a wreck. Obsessed. Crying. over-sensitive. trying to control the situation. I was freaking out Now I go out on friday nights....meet people, have fun. I actually ignored my ex's missed calls last weekend. She didn't call back or leave a message. SHE doesn't care that much I knew this already so why answer the phone?! WHY do it? Why break NC with her.....ever. She dumped me, now I am dumping her from my life.......... Rip up the pictures, put the gifts in a box Its over!
Author lofi_tokyo Posted October 20, 2008 Author Posted October 20, 2008 Rip up the pictures, put the gifts in a box Its over! Yup! It's definately over, and yes, I've got him out of my life, I won't break NC.. but now and then I just get these urges I must suppress to just break NC and try once more to win him back (though I realize that won't work). Bleh! Today though, I really don't care what hes up too. Too busy, and have a date coming up! AND I'm going to visit a friend in Toronto! Yay
JooLee Posted October 21, 2008 Posted October 21, 2008 i feel the urges comes from the hope. let the hope die... cos this hope is suicide for your self. its good your out there n enjoying life! have fun on yr date! hope it goes well
Author lofi_tokyo Posted October 21, 2008 Author Posted October 21, 2008 I'm trying to let the hope die, believe me I am, but its rooted pretty deep! Even if I tell myself he's never getting me back, which he isn't, I still HOPE he'll try coming back anyways. You're right though, gotta let it die. Just a matter of figuring out how to kill the darn thing. ;p
EmperorR Posted October 21, 2008 Posted October 21, 2008 I agree don't break nc it's like being really tired Nd drinking a red bull you silk get a short boost then come crashing down. Been there done that. My ex contacted me through text day with the most stupidest text MSG ever today would have bennnour third anniversary together. I just felt like replying back but nope it's been twenty eight days.
alwayssme Posted October 21, 2008 Posted October 21, 2008 Yup! It's definately over, and yes, I've got him out of my life, I won't break NC.. but now and then I just get these urges I must suppress to just break NC and try once more to win him back (though I realize that won't work). Bleh! Today though, I really don't care what hes up too. Too busy, and have a date coming up! AND I'm going to visit a friend in Toronto! Yay i feel like that too sometimes, it sucks but i knoew he isn't ever coming back, but deep deep down i hope that somehow he can always be around
FF84 Posted October 22, 2008 Posted October 22, 2008 Have a serious urge to break NC tonight. Must be strong.
Author lofi_tokyo Posted October 22, 2008 Author Posted October 22, 2008 Have a serious urge to break NC tonight. Must be strong. You can do it FF84. We all have our moments. Just post here on this thread in frustration if you need to ;p its helps!!
FF84 Posted October 22, 2008 Posted October 22, 2008 I managed, thanks, and i will be heading to bed soon for an early night so that's another day to add to the count
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