foxh1234 Posted October 18, 2008 Posted October 18, 2008 Hi everyone, it has been 7 months since the breakup and I can honestly say that I am almost completely over her. Every once in awhile I get a thought or memory that makes me think a bit. This site and the wonderful people on it have been the difference for me in so many ways. I am not going to name each great friend who helped me because they know who they are. The point of this thread is to let the newer members know that it does get better. Time and contemplation have freed me from the past and has allowed me to see things through clear eyes. I did everything wrong in the book when I found out she had been cheating and I beat myself up for months for the mistakes I had made and the what if's. Once I realized that the situation was out of my control and the only person that was going to make me feel better was me, It was like a light went off in my head. I am not going to say it was easy, but let time pass, go complete NC and write out your thoughts here and above all, listen to the experience of the wonderful posters that helped me and thousands of others to get past this crazy thing called breaking up. I am starting to date after 3-4 train wreck dates,lol. Iam going out 2 of the next 3 nights and I am finally ready to meet someone and not compare them to the ex. It feels great and I know that each of you will get there. Good luck to all and God Bless.
sedgwick Posted October 20, 2008 Posted October 20, 2008 It's been 15 months for me and I'm nowhere near over it. I'd give anything to have been over it by seven months.
Author foxh1234 Posted October 20, 2008 Author Posted October 20, 2008 It's been 15 months for me and I'm nowhere near over it. I'd give anything to have been over it by seven months. Hi Sedge, I didn't start to feel better until I got sick of filling crappy all the time. I had to make a decision to pick myself up and do things for me and make myself happy. Once I realized that I can't change things with her, a huge weight was lifted and I starting seeing things more clearly. Everyone is different Sedge and it might take you longer, but you WILL get there. I will tell you that when you do, you will look back on the time you wasted pining over him and wonder what the heck you were thinking.That's where I'm at now, wondering how the hell I could have wasted so much time on someone who would cheat and walk out on me so easily. Oh, BTW, I had a GREAT time in NYC, awesome city!!
Peter_pan Posted October 20, 2008 Posted October 20, 2008 9 months for me, i wish my ex cheated on me. would make things easier. i dont think im ever going to get over her. really. i didnt know what i had until it was gone. now i live full of regret and anger and sorrow. i keep asking myself why didnt i contact her when i knew she wasnt with him at one point? but i am glad you are in this position of thought. its amazing !
Sysyphus28 Posted October 20, 2008 Posted October 20, 2008 not over it. Getting thier though. This forum has been amazing. The advice has been crucial to me feeling better at all. She had been shi**** on me for months. I was holding on like she was a winning lottery ticket. She isn't.
Meaplus3 Posted October 20, 2008 Posted October 20, 2008 Good for you fox. It's so nice to read such a positive inspiring post as a reminder to those who are hurting that there is light at the end of the tunnel. I wish you the best of luck with your dates. Stay strong. AP:)
Nevermind Posted October 20, 2008 Posted October 20, 2008 Congratulations! :) Off to bigger and better things!
Author foxh1234 Posted October 20, 2008 Author Posted October 20, 2008 Thanks everyone, I really appreciate the kind words. The dates didn't go so well, lol. I will keep trying though and see what happens. She is out there waiting for me to find her, I know she is. The girl of my dreams could be right around the next corner.
kizik Posted October 21, 2008 Posted October 21, 2008 Fox, I have always appreciated your endless optimism. Glad to hear you're feeling well. For me, I wouldn't say I'm "over" her, as she will certainly linger in my thoughts for some time to come, but I'm so g*ddamn busy with work and school that I don't have time to worry about that girl's selfish a$$ anymore. Good luck with the new chicks, Josh
Author foxh1234 Posted October 21, 2008 Author Posted October 21, 2008 Fox, I have always appreciated your endless optimism. Glad to hear you're feeling well. For me, I wouldn't say I'm "over" her, as she will certainly linger in my thoughts for some time to come, but I'm so g*ddamn busy with work and school that I don't have time to worry about that girl's selfish a$$ anymore. Good luck with the new chicks, Josh Thanks buddy, I appreciate it. Keep in touch
ioncebelieved Posted October 21, 2008 Posted October 21, 2008 Just curious Fox, has your ex tried anymore stunts with you? Or has she pretty much gotten the hint? BTW, I am glad you are almost there.
CaliGuy Posted October 21, 2008 Posted October 21, 2008 Excellent news, Fox. I too am interested to know if your ex is still pinging you.
Author foxh1234 Posted October 21, 2008 Author Posted October 21, 2008 Just curious Fox, has your ex tried anymore stunts with you? Or has she pretty much gotten the hint? BTW, I am glad you are almost there. Hi, thanks IOB, the ex has popped up a few times at places that she knew I would be but that has pretty much stopped after I had a little talk with her about it. She still wants to try again, but you guys know my answer to that- NOOOOOOO!!!! I expect to run into her every once in awhile and soon enough I won't care in the least when I do see her.
lofi_tokyo Posted October 21, 2008 Posted October 21, 2008 Hi, thanks IOB, the ex has popped up a few times at places that she knew I would be but that has pretty much stopped after I had a little talk with her about it. She still wants to try again, but you guys know my answer to that- NOOOOOOO!!!! I expect to run into her every once in awhile and soon enough I won't care in the least when I do see her. So she dumped you 7 months ago and has been, for a while now, trying to win you back? I'm glad you've moved on without her! If she didnt appreciate you and hurt you, she does not deserve you back!
Author foxh1234 Posted October 21, 2008 Author Posted October 21, 2008 So she dumped you 7 months ago and has been, for a while now, trying to win you back? I'm glad you've moved on without her! If she didnt appreciate you and hurt you, she does not deserve you back! I agree, she does not deserve me. We had a great thing until she screwed it up. She regrets it, I'm sure of that but cheat on me once and it's over. I can forgive alot, but not that. Call me what you will, but as much as I loved her and still care about her, I could not let her back into my heart after cheating and lying about it for months. She will accept it eventually, she is kind of in the place now where I was months ago. The shoe is on the other foot so to speak as she wants me and would do anything to get me back and she is slowly realizing that nothing will work.
dharris27 Posted October 21, 2008 Posted October 21, 2008 sick of feeling crappy is exactly what everyone should use in order to switch that light on. Life is a beautiful thing full of music, art, wonderful people, and here and there wonderful relationships with important people...some that don't always sustain themselves, but the fact you were able to have that at any given point just proves how wonderful life can be. I think with an outlook so opptomistic you only draw wonderful things toward you like a ball rolling down a hill. That has happened to me since i gave up the fight called feeling crappy about a break up. Good luck to you all.
Recommended Posts