Having things in common, vs chemistry, vs "third dimension," vs compatibility?

[Isolde]

What do these frequently used terms mean, and which is most important?

 

I find it annoying that often people say "We have no chemistry" and they could mean it in terms of "we have nothing in common" or "I'm not attracted to you," or "I don't feel that special thing around you," or "we're not compatible."

 

*Excuse me while I create my imaginary BF who I have all of these things with (ie, isn't it almost impossible to have that in real life?!)

[BlueHarvest]

I think along the path of our life we build up our idea of the perfect boyfriend/girlfriend.

 

IMO there are two types of people. People who build from the ground up, and people who build from the top down. I'll explain...

 

People who build from the ground up generally are the people who date/get intimate with alot of people. They start off with nearly no restrictions (or very few) on who they see or date...but slowly filter out people who don't interest them through experience.

 

People who build from the top down generally set ALOT of restrictions on people they think they will date, have very few dates, and base everything on their preferences. As the dates (or lack of dates) go by...they generally compromise certain beliefs/values in order to find that someone that they feel comfortable with.

 

I'm the second type. I've always had a lofty idea of who I want to date (even though my restrictions really aren't that lofty), I compromised but made a big mistake when I did.

 

My suggestion is if you can...try to be open to people you didn't consider "dating" material. Get to know that guy who seems a little wierd but he's cute. Let that girl date you even though she is a size 8 instead of a size 4, maybe you two will hit it off.

 

Just my 2 cents.