SarahRose Posted October 14, 2008 Posted October 14, 2008 I have been thinking about the relationships I've had and thought I would ask on here; who do you think benefits most from a relationship? Men? Women? Both? I think ideally both should but what has been your actual experiences?
Trialbyfire Posted October 14, 2008 Posted October 14, 2008 Depends on who is giving and who is taking. Yup, this would be it.
Isolde Posted October 14, 2008 Posted October 14, 2008 I think it amounts to the same in the end or people wouldn't bother trying for relationships and marriages. I think men have a harder time going from the physical to the emotional but once they're there, they're really there. And women can be superficial too. I truly think its equal all things told. It may be true that women are more emotionally prepared though so in real life it might play out that women gain more true contentment that transcends the sexual (just my theory)
Lizzie60 Posted October 14, 2008 Posted October 14, 2008 But from my experience, men benefit more.. There is a lot more men that are cake eater... they have the best of both worlds. Some men (some even confess proudly).. do eff'all at home.. they both work outside.. but guess who does all the house cleaning, the laundry (skid marks.. ) the kids, the finances, etc.. etc.. the WIFE.. they just don't care.. plus they have a mistress in most cases.. This is not new.. but I will add.. to be fair to male LSers.. that I've seen that more in older males.. younger men tend to be more generous with their time at home.. but I'd say that it still isn't 50/50.. maybe 45/55.. lol
Yamaha Posted October 14, 2008 Posted October 14, 2008 I think men have a harder time going from the physical to the emotional but once they're there, they're really there I agree that once a man gets emotionally attached he is hooked. This is why so many men friends of women are really in-love because friendship is very emotionally based. Women seem to have an easier time if a relationship ends and I's like to know the reason. But from my experience, men benefit more.. Men become comfortable in a relationship. Many times they never see something going south until things are beyond repair. They really just want to be feed and appreciated. Depends on who is giving and who is taking. Totally agree.
Alma Mobley Posted October 14, 2008 Posted October 14, 2008 LOL this one seems like a trap, so I will say neither.
DeePee Posted October 14, 2008 Posted October 14, 2008 Whoever is emotionally stronger. That's the one who will be able to "get away" with more, or not give in to the other's wants and needs all the time.
You'reasian Posted October 14, 2008 Posted October 14, 2008 I think it amounts to the same in the end or people wouldn't bother trying for relationships and marriages. I think men have a harder time going from the physical to the emotional but once they're there, they're really there. And women can be superficial too. I truly think its equal all things told. It may be true that women are more emotionally prepared though so in real life it might play out that women gain more true contentment that transcends the sexual (just my theory) Do we know each other?
Author SarahRose Posted October 14, 2008 Author Posted October 14, 2008 LOL this one seems like a trap, so I will say neither. No right or wrong answer. Just looking at what people's experiences have been. The comments, so far, have been quite thoughtful, intelligent, and interesting.
Author SarahRose Posted October 14, 2008 Author Posted October 14, 2008 Even though I'm nearly 50, I haven't had that many relationships to comment on. I had a 20 year marriage. I would say in general, the times when I was dating or maybe the first 6 months of a relationship, I benefited more. The men were keen on doing the little things; being romantic, attentive, and so on. Later on, I think they got comfortable and while they expected me to be the same towards them as in the beginning, they just stopped trying. I would be doing the little things to keep the relationship fresh and they would pretty much do nothing. That is really sad when I think about it but it was true. In my marriage, my husband was really into me and even though we are divorced, I know I am still the love of his life. It is such a shame that his addictions and anger issues were a priority for him. I would still be with him. I think there are some ways I benefited in the marriage BUT I gave up and sacrificed a lot. I just ended a 4 year relationship that turned out to be so disappointing. It ended up so one sided where I was doing all the giving and he gave zero to the relationship. Oh he wanted to be with me but he didn't want to have to make any effort. I have thought about if I will date again or not, and sadly I don't think I will.
carhill Posted October 15, 2008 Posted October 15, 2008 I have been thinking about the relationships I've had and thought I would ask on here; who do you think benefits most from a relationship? Whoever cares the least. IME, that's been the women, but I think my experience, both in dating and marriage, is not the norm. YMMV I dated and married to share my happiness and life vision with another human, not to "benefit". When equals of such mind meet, I think therein lies enormous possibility. One can hope
Alma Mobley Posted October 15, 2008 Posted October 15, 2008 The comments, so far, have been quite thoughtful, intelligent, and interesting. Well, I am none of those three things. However, I would hope that relationships would be mutually beneficial, or else... why bother?
Rooster_DAR Posted October 15, 2008 Posted October 15, 2008 I have been thinking about the relationships I've had and thought I would ask on here; who do you think benefits most from a relationship? Men? Women? Both? I think ideally both should but what has been your actual experiences? Evolution is the sole beneficiary!
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