Why do 'similar' types of males and females hang around with each other?

[fromlonelytogreat]

When I walk around in public, I see that the girls and the guy will be of a similar attractiveness level. This is not necessarily just couples. I mean, I even see groups of people (presumably they are a group of friends) where all the girls are really good looking and the guys are of a similar nature.

 

What hope does that leave me? I am of asian appearance, but am very much attracted to caucasians.

[Suiyobi]

I'm sure your race has nothing to do with the kind of people that will want to hang out with you, and I'm sure that if you have enough "other" qualities aside from attractiveness then the so-called "attractive" people will still want you to be around them.

 

But all things equal though, I have to admit you'll find a much easier time hanging out with those people who are into Asian culture and/or anime.

[You'reasian]

.

 

What hope does that leave me? I am of asian appearance, but am very much attracted to caucasians.

 

It depends on where you live, your age, experience etc.

 

I'm sure some 'of asian apperance' folks probably hang out with people who are like themselves. I know race is a very, very sensitive issue for some people but that set aside you'd probably gravitate to people who share similar personalities, interests etc.

[raclar]

I think I have ready some psychology studies that found that people do frequently end up with mates of similar attractiveness. But surely that is ALWAYS true. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder! I would try not to focus so much on people's looks and maybe try to find people that you enjoy being around, and that you have things in common with.

[Trialbyfire]

I fail to understand what attractiveness has got to do with race.

 

Yes, people of similar attractiveness appear to gravitate to each other. No, race has nothing to do with it unless you're a racist. Yes, culture has much to do with it. If you can't relate in attitudes towards life, especially humour, you're not going to want to hang out together.

[Sks]

I fail to understand what attractiveness has got to do with race.

 

Yes, people of similar attractiveness appear to gravitate to each other. No, race has nothing to do with it unless you're a racist. Yes, culture has much to do with it. If you can't relate in attitudes towards life, especially humour, you're not going to want to hang out together.

 

lol, attractiveness is tied to race, just accept it. It is part of who you are and you wish to be with people who are similar to you.

 

To the OP, be around people like yourself - it is much more fulfilling.

[Trialbyfire]

lol, attractiveness is tied to race, just accept it. It is part of who you are and you wish to be with people who are similar to you.

 

To the OP, be around people like yourself - it is much more fulfilling.

As someone who isn't a racist, I'll have to firmly disagree. I have friends of different races, albeit westernized. I've dated men of different races.

[Sks]

As someone who isn't a racist, I'll have to firmly disagree. I have friends of different races, albeit westernized. I've dated men of different races.

 

That's great for you, but not most people and certainly not me.

[Trialbyfire]

That's great for you, but not most people and certainly not me.

Blatantly not...

[Sks]

Blatantly not...

 

What? We had this discussion before, people who are similar to each other always group together, that encompasses all things.

 

The majority of people are interested in staying within their race, you seem to have a problem with that.

 

To the OP, you fit in much better with those who are similar to you, I have long hair, I like metal, I am white. I hang around the people who are similar to me and I fit in well.

 

I don't try to fit into the black "hip hop" group as its just not who I am or wish to be.

[You'reasian]

 

To the OP, you fit in much better with those who are similar to you, I have long hair, I like metal, I am white. I hang around the people who are similar to me and I fit in well.

 

I don't try to fit into the black "hip hop" group as its just not who I am or wish to be.

 

There's some truth to that, but sometimes hobbies and political interests cross racial lines - as in the case that former Gen. Shinseki has probably spent a great deal of time with say former Gen. Colin Powell on more than work related issues.

 

 

And whose Cthulu's running mate?

[pandagirl]

As an Asian-American, sometimes race plays a factor and sometimes it doesn't. I have never dated an Asian guy, not because I am a self-loathing Asian, but simply because I was brought up in a white upper-middle class neighborhood.

 

I have a couple of Asian friends, but the rest are all white.

[fromlonelytogreat]

As an Asian-American, sometimes race plays a factor and sometimes it doesn't. I have never dated an Asian guy, not because I am a self-loathing Asian, but simply because I was brought up in a white upper-middle class neighborhood.

 

I have a couple of Asian friends, but the rest are all white.

 

See, that's like me. I grew up and went to school with 95% of the children being caucasian. I like white girls!

 

I rarely ever see any white female/asian male couples in my city (I'm in Australia). Which is why I feel that meeting the right girl is even harder for me.

 

I smile when I do see one!!

[pandagirl]

See, that's like me. I grew up and went to school with 95% of the children being caucasian. I like white girls!

 

I rarely ever see any white female/asian male couples in my city (I'm in Australia). Which is why I feel that meeting the right girl is even harder for me.

 

I smile when I do see one!!

 

You should move to California! There's a lot of white female/asian male couples!

[CandyGirlXO]

You should move to California! There's a lot of white female/asian male couples!

 

 

 

Yes there are. IMO race has nothing to do with attractiveness. I actually find mixed races to be the most attractive. Jessica Alba, Tiger woods, Tyra Banks...

 

Studies have shown that people hang out and marry those that look a lot like them. Maybe unconsciously it's a comfort thing.

[pandagirl]

 

Studies have shown that people hang out and marry those that look a lot like them. Maybe unconsciously it's a comfort thing.

 

I think this is probably true, especially of your friends. Although, how do you explain all the hot girls who end up with un-hot guys? haha.

[carhill]

OP, IMO, you're seeing what you want to see. I call it "projecting". You have a certain thought process and validate it in real life.

 

I travel a lot and see a lot of different people and cultures and races and, not having the predisposition to viewing people by their physicality, I just don't see what you're seeing, nor do I experience it within my group of friends and acquaintances. Therein lies the true meaning; the meaning of our differences.

 

Try an experiment. Hang out with some people (or befriend people, as I often do in my travels) who you believe are "different" from you in ways which matter to you. See what happens. Sometimes "differences" aren't what they seem to be

[Lizzie60]

When I walk around in public, I see that the girls and the guy will be of a similar attractiveness level. This is not necessarily just couples. I mean, I even see groups of people (presumably they are a group of friends) where all the girls are really good looking and the guys are of a similar nature.

 

What hope does that leave me? I am of asian appearance, but am very much attracted to caucasians.

 

 

that leaves you with the same chances as those people .. unless you are hideous..

 

I do believe in 'leagues' people of similar appearance, similar social 'classes', etc.. etc.. do hang out with each other.. that's life.

[CandyGirlXO]

I think this is probably true, especially of your friends. Although, how do you explain all the hot girls who end up with un-hot guys? haha.

 

 

LOL easily...low self esteem they don't realize how pretty they are. Also there are more attractive females then males so maybe lack of selection or of course MONEY!

[carhill]

Also there are more attractive females then males so maybe lack of selection or of course MONEY!

 

Now this is a subject all its own. Maybe you should start a thread

[pandagirl]

LOL easily...low self esteem they don't realize how pretty they are. Also there are more attractive females then males so maybe lack of selection or of course MONEY!

 

Seriously, RARELY do you see a guy with a girl below "his level." Although, I have to say, I have managed to snag some VERY attractive men, and I don't think I'm all that at all!

[Disillusioned]

When I walk around in public, I see that the girls and the guy will be of a similar attractiveness level. This is not necessarily just couples. I mean, I even see groups of people (presumably they are a group of friends) where all the girls are really good looking and the guys are of a similar nature.

 

What hope does that leave me? I am of asian appearance, but am very much attracted to caucasians.

 

It just goes to show that opposites do not always attract. BTW I mistakenly thought this thread was going to be about people with common interests being attracted to each other... oh well.

 

Why should being Asian be a barrier toward finding a group to spend time with? Do you live in some part of the world where there's a lot of prejudice against Asians?

[yongyong]

what you mean 'races are nothing to do with it?' are you talking about the dream world?

 

look at those twinkies who grew up here, look at those adoptees even raised by white parents. you see most of them end up with asian crowds and spouses.

 

it's not just about the culture. you can't change blood.

[marlena]

Personally, I love meeting and talking with peope of different cultures. I find it fascinating and very mind-expanding. I think of it as a learning experience, a way to improve myself.

 

I am sure that a lot of people feel the same way as I do. If you are not making friends because of your ethnic background, or so you think, perhaps, it is because like Carhill said, you are projecting your insecurities onto other people and they are picking up on this. Or it could be that you are trying to make friends with people who do not like to mix with other races, in which case, why would you want to befriend them in the first place?

[Trialbyfire]

Yes, I agree it has much to do with insecurities. I've personally experienced racist comments and attitudes when dating other ethnicities. Frack 'em.

 

Straight up, people like this should go find their homing rock and crawl back under it.