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is it shallow that I don't want to date a 27 year old who is completely gray?

lovestruck818

By lovestruck818
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lovestruck818 Established Member

lovestruck818

Posted
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So, went out with this guy a few times now. He is 27 and a lot of fun and most of what I want...except he completely gray-haired and loves that he he is and refuses to do anything to hide it. While he doesn't have a bad-looking face or body, the gray hair is something I find completely unattractive. He reminds me too much of my grandpa and I don't know if I could see myself being serious with someone like that. (Also negative is that he lives about an hour and a half away...but that is more ok with me than gary hair).

 

Am I being incredibly shallow about this? I don't know why it bothers me so much. I am so picky and I feel like while being picky can be good sometimes, I might be missing on other good ones b/c I am so picky.

 

I dunno...thoughts?

Angel1111 Established Member

Angel1111

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He's geographically undesireable AND physically undesireable so don't waste your time with this. If it bugs you, then it's important. It doesn't matter if it's shallow or not. I like guys with grey hair but that's because I'm older. When I was in my 20's, I think that would've been a turn-off, too.

JamesM Established Member

JamesM

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If it bugs you, then it's important. It doesn't matter if it's shallow or not.

 

This quote is the best answer you will receive.

 

Others may find gray hair attractive, but you do not. If you found HIM attractive, then the gray hair would not be an issue.

Kamille Established Member

Kamille

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I love gray hair on young men.

 

So the good news is, even though it's a turn off for you, it isn't a turn off for everyone - so if you let him go, he's bound to find someone else easily.

 

In all honesty, yes it is shallow but your preferences are your preferences and there isn't much you can do to change them.

 

i'm wondering though if perhaps you just aren't feeling it for this guy and are using the gray hair as a way to bail out?

Al_Bundy Established Member

Al_Bundy

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Am I being incredibly shallow about this?

 

You really want an answer to that?

 

Lemme put it this way, what would you do if you married a guy, and in 5 years he went bald?

Green Established Member

Green

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My hairs got no gray! If your super hot and good at doing things you can be my gf

You'reasian Established Member

You'reasian

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Also negative is that he lives about an hour and a half away...but that is more ok with me than gary hair).

I dunno...thoughts?

 

Anything but the gary hair. That's gotta be the worst. Dump him. Dump him now.

allanDR Established Member

allanDR

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Tell him that you find it really unattractive and ask him if he'll dye it for you. Maybe you really are a wonderful girl besides being picky about hair and he'll do it for you. Yeah it's shallow but you're being honest. Maybe it'll work, the worst that'll happen is he'll dump you.

Jilly Bean Established Member

Jilly Bean

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the gray hair is something I find completely unattractive.

 

This is a deal-breaker for you.

 

If he's not willing to Go Grecian, then let him go.

 

FWIW, if his head hair is gray, chances are his pubes are, too!

You'reasian Established Member

You'reasian

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.

 

FWIW, if his head hair is gray, chances are his pubes are, too!

 

And if his head is shaved? :p

sweetbutcheeky Established Member

sweetbutcheeky

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Maybe it's not natural, though only one way to find out! :laugh:

 

Could be that he dyes it like Jay Manuel, the makeup artist on America's Top Model.

Konfuzion Established Member

Konfuzion

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I don't think its shallow at all... I like blond's am I shallow?

Jersey Shortie Established Member

Jersey Shortie

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...except he completely gray-haired and loves that he he is and refuses to do anything to hide it

 

First, how do you know he refuses to do anything about it?

 

Two, good for him that he refuses to do anything about it! He isn't embarressed by that and that is an attractive quality.

 

Third, I think gray hair can be sexy. I have even dated young men who were loosing their hair that I still found sexy. :eek:

 

Fourth, let him go, you aren't into him.

pretty professional Established Member

pretty professional

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That Taylor Hicks from American Idol is pretty hot and he is young with the grey hair. Maybe you should rethink this.

Sks Established Member

Sks

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I would not date a female who had gray hair, at least not at this age.

 

So if you don't like it, don't do it. I don't see why it matters if its "shallow" or not.

popey Established Member

popey

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OP's question is: is this shallow?

 

of course it is! doesn't mean therefor that she should date him, even if it bothers her. but still call it like it is, shallow.

Lizzie60 Established Member

Lizzie60

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You're not shallow.. I don't like gray hair myself.. and I'm much older than you are.. gray hair is a huge turn-off..

 

Shallow or not.. it's like that.. period.. :laugh:

audrey_1 Established Member

audrey_1

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My first impression would be that, yes, it seems shallow.

 

But if it bothers you, then it's a valid lack of attraction on your part at this time. But just know that at some point, you'll probably be revisiting this again, as age is inevitable...

 

My last relationship was with a friend who was very dark haired when we were kids, but grayed soon after high school. He is completely gray now at age 33. I think it's incredibly becoming on him. It sets off his blue eyes.:love:

carhill Established Member

carhill

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Am I being incredibly shallow about this?

 

Depends. Define what shallow means to you when someone else is judging you by your physical appearance :)

Angel1111 Established Member

Angel1111

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Depends. Define what shallow means to you when someone else is judging you by your physical appearance :)

 

I'm guessing that this guy wouldn't be dating her if SHE had grey hair.

Cherry Blossom 35 Established Member

Cherry Blossom 35

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I think gray hair is kinda hot :love:

 

Beer bellies, not :love:

Bells Established Member

Bells

Posted
Posted
So, went out with this guy a few times now. He is 27 and a lot of fun and most of what I want...except he completely gray-haired and loves that he he is and refuses to do anything to hide it. While he doesn't have a bad-looking face or body, the gray hair is something I find completely unattractive. He reminds me too much of my grandpa and I don't know if I could see myself being serious with someone like that. (Also negative is that he lives about an hour and a half away...but that is more ok with me than gary hair).

 

Am I being incredibly shallow about this? I don't know why it bothers me so much. I am so picky and I feel like while being picky can be good sometimes, I might be missing on other good ones b/c I am so picky.

 

I dunno...thoughts?

 

Am I being incredibly shallow about this?

 

 

Of course

 

You should get over the fact that he is grey....yes, you are shallow about this. But, this doesn't suprise me in today's society.

Cherry Blossom 35 Established Member

Cherry Blossom 35

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Of course

 

You should get over the fact that he is grey....yes, you are shallow about this. But, this doesn't suprise me in today's society.

 

Are you attracted to very overweight women, Bells? No? Then you must be shallow. But, this doesn't surprise me in today's society.

Bells Established Member

Bells

Posted
Posted
Are you attracted to very overweight women, Bells? No? Then you must be shallow. But, this doesn't surprise me in today's society.

 

Believe or not...I had been attracted to some overweight women.

 

I'm the kind of guy that it doesn't take much for me to be physically attracted.

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