nena999 Posted October 10, 2008 Posted October 10, 2008 I don’t think I am in love with my boyfriend anymore. We have been together almost 9 months. He is the sweetest guy in the world, does so many things to try to make me happy but I really feel like the flame is no longer there. I get so easily irritated when he’s around now yet I get even more irritated when he’s not around. I feel like I need to just go back to California and pick up where I left off. I made a move to Spain to be with him and now I really feel like I made a mistake. He does nothing wrong, I just feel that this lifestyle is not for me. If he was in California with me I’d still be with him and in fact think that we will be perfect together. Me being in another country, not really speaking the language, having 0 friends, staying home ALL the time waiting for him to get off work. I can’t work yet because I am not a citizen here yet…basically not til he marries me. I feel like my life is passing me by…I help around the house and all..but mainly i sleep all day and do nothing. I am capable of so many things and my life before him consisted of working full time and making lots of money. Now i feel like a loser couch potato and i hate it. It is as if my life cannot resume normalcy until he marries me…he is the one to make the decision, he has the control. How romantic is that? I am confuse, I don’t know if its just the situation making me not happy, or if i truly just don’t love him. I thought if you love somebody you can handle anything for him. What do you guys think? Should I let this otherwise great guy go?
konfuzd Posted October 10, 2008 Posted October 10, 2008 Why don't you sign up for some spanish lessons? Not only will it help you communicate with people, it gives you an opportunity to make friends.
siriusmatt Posted October 11, 2008 Posted October 11, 2008 It sounds more like you have a problem with your living arrangements. I've been stuck in that rut before. You can lose your mind pretty easily if you are cooped up all day with nothing to do. It's a nasty little circle; when you are understimulated, ennui sets in and you can't summon the energy to do something even if you have something to do. I couldn't really speak to your feelings for your boyfriend, but if you're despairing over your situation, it can definitely sour your relationship. Try finding interesting things to put in your life. Like Konfuzd said, learn the language. Take in the culture. Could you get a temporary work visa? I bet if you looked around you could find plenty of American ex-pats dying to speak their own language. Maybe you could find where they tend to hang around. Hope things pick up for you though, good luck!
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