mickey12 Posted October 7, 2008 Posted October 7, 2008 I was seeing this guy for 2 months. We weren’t official but we both weren’t seeing anyone else. One night that we had organise to hang out he said he doesn’t know whether we should cause his going away on Friday for 4 months (coming home for a few days-weeks in between before he goes again, his a professional surfer) This hurt me but I accepted it. He told me he thought I was amazing and he really liked me just didn’t want to make it harder for both of us when he left by seeing each other now. Well he went and I didn’t try and contact him, and then 2 weeks later I received a message off him whilst he as in a 2 day stop over in Sydney, he said he missed me and wished he could come home and see me. We talked a lot ion those 2 days and then he departed again for overseas. We stayed in contact and he sent me a message one day saying he returns home in 4 days and that we should catch up, do dinner and he misses me. Well he came home and I didn’t hear off him I sent him a message saying how was your trip and he wrote back but whenever I seemed to mention hanging he ignored it. I sent him another message the next day saying we should do something soon and he didn’t reply so I said why aren’t you replying and he wrote "yeh im keen to do something". I confronted him a day later saying "if you don’t want to hang tell me" and he said "I kinda do but it might just make things harder because I have to go again in 7 days". I then sent a message saying well why say you want to and you miss me when obviously you don’t" to which he replied "I thought I did want to see you but I don’t sorry to lead you on". Since then he wont talk to me at all completely ignores me. I sent him one last message saying "Hey fully understand you don’t want anything it wouldn’t have worked from both sides, just want to be friends no ill feelings". I never heard off him. Haven’t contacted him since, its been 4 days Why does he all of a sudden seem to hate me? Did I cluster him too much and freak him out, is there another girl, is he scared of getting attached again? Did he just come home and want his freedom and a one-night stand with no strings attached? Please help why won’t he talk at all I feel like I’ve done something terribly wrong and im beating myself up about it.
unknown815 Posted October 8, 2008 Posted October 8, 2008 I was seeing this guy for 2 months. We weren’t official but we both weren’t seeing anyone else. One night that we had organise to hang out he said he doesn’t know whether we should cause his going away on Friday for 4 months (coming home for a few days-weeks in between before he goes again, his a professional surfer) This hurt me but I accepted it. He told me he thought I was amazing and he really liked me just didn’t want to make it harder for both of us when he left by seeing each other now. Well he went and I didn’t try and contact him, and then 2 weeks later I received a message off him whilst he as in a 2 day stop over in Sydney, he said he missed me and wished he could come home and see me. We talked a lot ion those 2 days and then he departed again for overseas. We stayed in contact and he sent me a message one day saying he returns home in 4 days and that we should catch up, do dinner and he misses me. Well he came home and I didn’t hear off him I sent him a message saying how was your trip and he wrote back but whenever I seemed to mention hanging he ignored it. I sent him another message the next day saying we should do something soon and he didn’t reply so I said why aren’t you replying and he wrote "yeh im keen to do something". I confronted him a day later saying "if you don’t want to hang tell me" and he said "I kinda do but it might just make things harder because I have to go again in 7 days". I then sent a message saying well why say you want to and you miss me when obviously you don’t" to which he replied "I thought I did want to see you but I don’t sorry to lead you on". Since then he wont talk to me at all completely ignores me. I sent him one last message saying "Hey fully understand you don’t want anything it wouldn’t have worked from both sides, just want to be friends no ill feelings". I never heard off him. Haven’t contacted him since, its been 4 days Why does he all of a sudden seem to hate me? Did I cluster him too much and freak him out, is there another girl, is he scared of getting attached again? Did he just come home and want his freedom and a one-night stand with no strings attached? Please help why won’t he talk at all I feel like I’ve done something terribly wrong and im beating myself up about it. I'm sure he doesnt hate you. I would leave it alone. Delete his number from your phone. It wasnt that serious to begin with so why beat yourself up over this. To be honest, i dont think it has anything to do with him not wanting to get too attached and make it harder by him leaving. Thats a straight up Lie?? Hes either seeing someone else or hes just not that into you. Regardless of what he says or texts - actions are what you have to go by with a man everything else is worthless. Move on. forget him.
Author mickey12 Posted October 8, 2008 Author Posted October 8, 2008 Thanks so much for your help your so supportive he just contacted me then saying hey how was your weekend?? what did you get up?? i would still like to be friends to but i just dont want a girl friend at this point it has nothing to do with you!!! you are perfect!! i dont think im going to reply, or atleast for some time and when/ if i do i will just keep it very casual light hearted
Crestfallen_KH Posted October 8, 2008 Posted October 8, 2008 I would just let it go. It sounds like he pulled the ol "setup" routine; he didn't want a relationship with you, so he set you up to ask "WTF" and then responded with the ol' "oh, sorry, guess I can't be what you need." It's telling that he increases the contact when he's logistically unavailable, but then goes silent when he's in the neighborhood. He's not interested, but is too cowardly to say so. I'm sure you have actual, real friends in your life - I'd focus on them.
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