When will I go back to feeling normal?

[moby]

My boyfriend broke up with me about 3 months ago and I still really struggle sometimes with missing him. I still think about him everyday and some days I'm able to deal with the feelings and not get upset and think of him in a happy way, but other days I really miss him and all I can think about is how I wish he would contact me and say he was sorry and that he would do whatever he could to take it back. Everyone just keeps telling me that I need to get over it and that I should move on but I honestly don't feel like it's just a choice I can make and I feel like no one is taking my pain seriously. I have stopped contacting him and I remind myself everyday that no good comes from having contact with him because it never has happy results. I also went away to another country for a few months, am taking up new activities and meeting new people but sometimes I just feel like none of it is helping. What am I doing wrong? I feel like I'm making steps to move my life forward but I just don't feel them working yet. I keep telling myself it just takes time but in the short term that isn't always all that comforting. Does anyone else have suggestions of what I can do? Before my relationship I was content on my own so when will I go back to feeling that way again? Thanks.

[alwayssme]

it sucks and this may not be comforting that much, but i feel the same way. Love hurts when it goes wrong, regardless of what the situation may be. When you lose the one you love, it is going to hurt. I'm going through alot myself too so I don't know what to say that would help you. If i knew a way to get over this heartache, beleive me I would do it, because the last thing I want is to be in the crazy emotional rollercoaster. One minute I accept that it's over and I'm thinking about moving on and I feel okay, then the next I want to call him and miss him and wiwsh with all my heart that somehow a miracle would happen and we would get back. But no matter what for my situation, it's over and I need to accept that. I could suggest a book you could read that's about moving on if you'd like?

[moby]

It is comforting to know that people do go through the same emotions, it makes me feel like the pain and hurt I feel is more legitimate and real. When I think about my ex I always think he probably doesn't even think about me let alone get upset about me. Maybe he is but because I don't talk to him I always feel like he isn't hurting at all. It makes me want to reach out to him to feel like I'm not the only one going through it but I don't think he would tell me honestly even if he was and in the long term it would do no good for me. I totally know what you mean about feeling like one minute you are okay and the next minute you feel like you are back at step one and missing him terribly. Maybe my problem is that I don't fully accept that things are over between me and him forever, he broke up with me because it was long distance and got too hard and he says not because he grew apart from me and stopped loving me, and I feel like at some point when he sorts out his issues and figures himself out if the timing is right between me and him then it could be possible. It doesn't help that he reinforced that message to me when we broke up and before the no contact was calling and telling me that in a few years we would be back together. Then I remember that if he had really loved me he would have made it work, because I really loved him and although it was hard I was prepared to continue to work for our relationship. I'm so sick of my feelings flipping all over the place. I have never been this type of person before and people tell me I have a lot of things going for me (not that I really believe them right now) so it's frustrating feeling like he has brought me to this constant roller coaster of emotions which seem to control my life right now. Also yea I would like to know the name of the book! Thanks for taking the time to reply to me!