Suiyobi Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 This isn't an "issue" per se, but it's something I've been rather curious about for the past weeks. There's this girl that I used to like but, to make a long story short, let's just say she couldn't return the same feelings. Okay, not a big deal. Thing is, she seems to want to hang out with me quite a lot, like once or twice a week. Don't get me wrong, she's a great girl with lots of friends and I'm sure she doesn't have any problem keeping herself busy. And in no way is she desperate or needy. So now my question is, if she doesn't like me the same way I like her, why does she persist on hanging out with me? I think I'm a decent guy and all, but honestly I don't perceive myself as extroverted and interesting at all. I don't think I'm her doormat either because I don't always do everything for her nor am I always available, but every now and then when I am with her I do some gentlemanly things like open the door for her or allow her to walk ahead of me if there's a tight space or whatnot ("ladies first" mentality). But other than that I'm more of a homebody person. Maybe she saw this in me and is trying to get me to go out more often? Or does she genuinely like my company (which I have no idea why)? Or does she secretly like me but just doesn't want to admit it? Lol I dunno... could someone shed some light here please? P.S. - I also enjoy her company, she's a fun person to be around with. Probably why I liked her in the first place. But you know the saying, you can't always get what you want.
Tony T Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 She likes you as a friend. She probably likes you more than life itself but not romantically. That's because when she's with you she can have fun without you having your hand on her boobs or on her butt and continuously going in a sexual direction. You are very safe to her and that's a plus, although it will never get you laid and when she does find a guy she's really into you'll likely be history. Meanwhile, you are a breath of fresh air to her and a person she can be herself around...you are someone she doesn't have to impress... you are someone who will always be there for her....someone she can depend on....someone she doesn't have to worry will get her pregnant, etc. If that's what you want to be, hang out with her now and then. But you are crazy as hell if you don't go find yourself a romantic interest elsewhere. When you do, it's not likely your love interest will want you hanging around with this gal much. As long as things stay exactly like they are now, no problem. If you develop feelings for her and tell her, it's over. If you don't tell her, it will be a living hell. If either of you find a romantic interest, it's pretty much all over as well. OK, now, I hope you understand what's going on.
Author Suiyobi Posted October 5, 2008 Author Posted October 5, 2008 Heh, thing is even to this day we usually flirt and we tend to invade each others' spaces. She's the type of girl who'll tell someone straight up how she feels if need be, so I'd think that by now she would have told me to stop the flirting and all if she wasn't comfortable or if she didn't like me enough. So now if some random person saw us he/she would think that this girl and I are dating. But it's true, I never took the sexual direction any further after I found out that she doesn't like me any more than as a friend. And I'm cool with that, I wasn't desperate for a relationship or anything. I guess I was actually more curious about as to why she likes me as a friend and want to continue our friendship? I always thought it'd be easier to just cut off contact and disassociate. Hell, I never knew that I'm likeable enough. I always thought I had a scary face and a plain personality lol. As to why anyone wants to be seen hanging out with me is beyond my comprehension. But you are crazy as hell if you don't go find yourself a romantic interest elsewhere. I am crazy. But I wouldn't mind focusing my romantic interest on another girl given the opportunity.
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