xXxshootingstarxXx Posted October 4, 2008 Posted October 4, 2008 I still have the engagement ring my ex bought for me... it just sits in it's box now. He never asked for it back and it's been two months since he broke up with me... Do I keep it (although I may never wear it again) or is it time for me to sell the ring on??
watermeloncandy Posted October 4, 2008 Posted October 4, 2008 chances are, if he hasn't asked for it back by now, he's not going to (not that i necessarily believe you have to give it back to him...it depends on the reason why you broke up - if it's his fault, i say you don't have to give it back...he's the one that broke the promise to marry you). do you think once you are over the break up there might be a chance you'd want to wear it on the other hand? or change it into a necklace? (probably not, right?), so i'd sell it. but if you aren't sure, just put it somewhere where you won't see it, or give it to someone you trust to hold onto it for you, and then when you are over him and the break up, then decide what to do....
CaliGuy Posted October 4, 2008 Posted October 4, 2008 Give the ring to a friend or family member to deliver to him. I wouldn't sell it. It's his. He broke up with you and even though that broke the engagement off, I think the RIGHT thing to do is give it back to him.
Konfuzion Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 Legally the ring belongs to her, and engagement ring is a gift.
mixwell Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 You should give the ring back to him.. Not only will it show that you acknowledge that its over its kind of sleazy to sell the ring and besides be bought it for you and since you aren't going to get married I think its only right. Unless you are that hard up for money. If I were in his shoes and the chick didn't offer to give the ring back I would take it as a shady sign that you're that hard up for cash to sell the ring.. Show that you have acknowledged the ending of the relationship and mail, or have someone give him the ring back.. I think it would be F'ed up to just sell it and seems kinda like you have no class if you do in my book...
Chinook Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 I gave mine back. You talk about selling it in a very impersonal way. I can almost guarantee you'll regret it if you sell it. For me, the ring meant so much I couldnt have given it to anyone else. I gave it back because it was a symbol that I'd accepted it was over. As far as I know he still has it. He said he couldn't sell it either... so it sits in it's box at the bottom of a crate in his father's warehouse.
Author xXxshootingstarxXx Posted October 5, 2008 Author Posted October 5, 2008 I should give the ring back to him. My friend is persistent that I should sell it on!!! Grrrr!!... And in my heart I don't feel it's the right thing to do - so I thought I'd ask you guys for some advice and thankyou for your replies! I did meet up with my ex a week ago for a friendly drink (it was my suggestion) even though it went okay, from his side - the spark has definitely gone... but I caught him glancing at my hands a few times. Whether or not it was to see if still wore the ring... But he never asked about it. However... I shall give it back to him!
Simplycaroline Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 I can not even believe that you are evern considering selling the ring. You were considering marrying this man and now that you are not you consider the sale of such an important symbol of love and committment? Give the ring back to him if he ever meant anything to you.
Geishawhelk Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 Legally the ring belongs to her, and engagement ring is a gift. No, actually, this is completely incorrect. No matter who broke the engagement, the ring should go back to him as it's a pledge and contract. as the contract is broken, the original proprietor is entitled to his property back. I would simply post it back or request that a friend give it back to him. Either way, keep some sort of proof that the ring is no longer in your possession.
Rooster_DAR Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 Legally the ring belongs to her, and engagement ring is a gift. Wrong!!!!! The ring is "by legal terms" a conditional gift. In court, if the marriage does not take place the ring goes back to the donor. You should really research before you make claims like this. Cheers!
carhill Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 Can't imagine a small claims or superior court action being brought over an engagement ring (for most normal people) but I guess for some Traditionally, a gentleman breaking an engagement surrenders his interest in the ring received by his intended as liquidated damages for his decision to end the engagement. If the reverse (lady breaks engagement), protocol dictates returning the ring to the gentleman. Note these are traditional social protocols, not legal ones. IANAL. As far as the OP, IMO, as long as the ring is not a family heirloom of your ex, I'd keep it, de-mount the gem(s) and make it into another piece of jewelry. The setting can be reclaimed. This is similar to what my wife did with the wedding sets from her previous two husbands. She has some nice necklaces and earrings as a result.
DoubleAce Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 OK, for everyone giving legal advice (including me in the first response), DON'T! After a little googling, it appears the ownership of the ring after a broken engagement depends on the jurisdiction. Sometimes it is always returned to the man as it was a conditional gift, sometimes it is hers, sometimes it depends on the circumstances of the break-up. It all depends on where you live!
Rooster_DAR Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 Yeah, there is grey area there. I would vote for if the guy calls off the wedding or cheats, then just keep the ring and sell it. If the disengagement is neutral of the woman cheats, the ring goes back to donor.
Geishawhelk Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 Wrong!!!!! The ring is "by legal terms" a conditional gift. In court, if the marriage does not take place the ring goes back to the donor. You should really research before you make claims like this. Cheers! Yo, Rooster - we're agreeing again!!
blind_otter Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 You only get to keep the engagement ring if you actually get married, IMO. I sold my engagement ring after I divorced my exH.
ninjaturtles Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 Hi, I think you should give it back to him.
periwink Posted October 5, 2008 Posted October 5, 2008 My friend kept her ring after a broken engagement and still wears it, just on a different finger. It's a nice ring, so there it would be a waste not to use it. Another friend had it remade in a different design. I would ask your ex what he wishes you to do with it - keep it or return it. Don't go into detail just ask that - shall I keep it or return it. Two options, he picks one. Then the matter is settled.
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