tomtom26 Posted September 30, 2008 Posted September 30, 2008 So recently I've been thinking about my breakup and rehashing a few things trying to get to the bottom of why the breakup happened. I’m sure it wasn’t just ONE thing, but I wanted to get some opinion on this matter: sex. My ex brought up the topic of sex first. I would joke around and say that I was a prude and she would investigate by asking me questions about what I meant and so forth. Most of the time I was just joking……sorta. The topic came up again and I said that “it will happen when the time is right.” I told her that “sex is probably the most intimate thing you can ever share with anybody, and that I didn’t want to just do it, and that as things progressed, it would come naturally”. Sex wasn’t brought up again, but she would tell me that she was very attracted to me and I would tell her the same thing. I would tell her that sometimes I wanted her bad. Basically I was protecting myself from getting too emotionally attached…….and rightfully so. We did, after all, break up. We dated for 3 months. I really really liked this girl, and she really really liked me. She said she respected me, she said that I was so easy to talk to, that she “got” me and I “got” her. She knew I would always take care of her and so forth…….and obviously the physical attraction (lust) was there too. Irony of the whole situation was that she broke up with me because she felt that we were getting too serious, she didn’t want to commit. She said she wasn’t ready for it and had to deal with other things in her life that were a priority (her art which is a passion of hers, her job, and so forth). So my question is, did she perhaps think that I wasn’t all that into her because I didn’t want to sleep with her? Did that turn her off? Usually the gender roles are switched around in that situation. Any input would be greatly appreciated. Thanks BTW, I'm 26, she's 25.
audrey_1 Posted September 30, 2008 Posted September 30, 2008 So my question is, did she perhaps think that I wasn’t all that into her because I didn’t want to sleep with her? Did that turn her off? Usually the gender roles are switched around in that situation. Any input would be greatly appreciated. Thanks I can only speak for myself in this same type of situation, and it did make me feel as though he wasn't in to me, as we were once physically intimate, and then we weren't. It seemed that his feelings for me had faded. It was confusing. Yes, I suppose this is a reversal of how it usually goes. I'm not sure whether it turned her off. In my case, I am still very much attracted to him; it just made me feel less womanly.
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