I'm a married woman

[Konfuzion]

Wow what a sad situation, I feel really sorry for the OP you need to seek out counseling immediately to work on whatever issues you have going on that you can justify cheating on your family and giving your husbands money away. I feel sorry for your husband as well I hope he is a very strong man, cause he is going to need the strength when all of this rears its ugly head.

[soulconfessions]

I disagree with this for a number of reasons. First, there is the practical and very real issue of giving your H a STD. Protection lessens the risk, but there is still considrable risk and the consequences can be grave. Early intervention with some of these diseases is critical in terms of mitigating the effects. Read condom labels. They confirm that the risk is stil present.

Second, there is the issue of the nature of your relationship with your spouse. With this deep dark secret festering, I think intimacy will be limited.

Third, there is no evidence that her H is in any way weak. That's not relevant, in any case. It's just as likely he has no clue and trusts his wife.

I'm sure you can see the inherent unfairness in you breaking your vows while he abides in reliance on your promises. This situation causes the most anger and resentment in a BS, as, like the STD exposure, it is clear evidence of how little value you place on his life and his freedom to choose its path.

I think, based on my reading, I speak for many BS's in relating how this type of disrespect, risk taking with my life and my ability to make an informed decision caused way more damage than the extramarital sex itself.

I acknowledge that a divorce and not seeing my kids, as well as the loss of my dream for a happy marriage to my wife has been very painful. But, I can deal with that better than the humiliation and pain of the betrayal and lying. I feel like years were taken from me. Co-parenting with that feeling is very difficult.

 

STD awariness applies to ANY relationship.

[bish]

yeah she probably does make a lot of sense but ranting and raving won't make me listen. maybe if she stopped ranting and raving and acting all consumed in my story then maybe i'll talk to her as an adult.

 

An adult? So you think acting like a 19 year old college freshman and sewing your oats this late in the game and betraying your husband and not even giving him consideration in your quest to concentrate on this other man is the actions of an "adult"??

 

And who is "she"?

[bish]

Soulconfessions:

 

Don't listen to most of the bull**** these people are thrusting upon you. The fact is only morons are telling you to go to your husband and confess everything.

 

She wants to divorce her husband, but as in her own words, SOMEDAY.

 

In other words, she is going to go on wasting years of his life that he will never get back for her own selfishness and she'll just drop the bomb on him later.

 

and that is downright despicable. So show me the bull####.

 

maybe you missed that little tidbit.

[bish]

I understand what you are saying but whether people agree or disagree with someones lifestyle or decissions, there is still a way of speaking to people without name calling.

 

Show me where I called you a name. I'll be waiting.

[bish]

I have asked for a divorce, i'e even asked him to leave me.. and i'm sorry i'm not familar with trialer trash. thanks for the insult tho..

 

He didn't call you trailer trash and he didn't insult you.

 

He said: "Ask your H for a divorce and agree up front to share custody...Insisting on anything less for him will make you roughly equivilent to trailer trash."

 

He is telling you what trailer trash is made of and to avoid that.

[bish]

Thank you S.O.G one of our biggest problem in our marriage is the break down in communication. When I do try to express my feelings I don't think he truly understands them or can relate to them so I hold them in.

 

So its all his fault eh?

[whichwayisup]

And who is "she"?

 

You.

 

Soul mistook you for a woman..

[bish]

You.

 

Soul mistook you for a woman..

 

Well if I was a woman, wouldn't you think that she would think I'd understand her plight and be totally sympathetic to the betrayal of her husband?

[bish]

Every now and then, we hear this kind of self-serving nonsense.

 

Damn, you are good. I like the way you think!

 

 

No, the affair sabotaged the marriage. It's only a matter of time before the BS finds out on his own, if he isn't told. Then, the repercussions are usually worse.

 

 

I am a living example of that. Finding out years later after marriage and 2 kids when I could have simply cancelled the wedding.

 

If he finds out later it WILL be worse, much worse. Not to mention selfish of her for not having the boobs to come clean.

 

 

There is no such thing as "blissful ignorance".

 

I agree. Because, although, the betrayed may not know they are being cheated on, somehow all is not right and the R is different and suffering as a result of the cheating.

 

 

This is how I can tell you've either never been subjected 2 infidelity or you didn't deal with it in a ma2re manner. The affair causes the hurt. It's the LIES, the CHEATING, the lack of RESPECT that is causing the hurt. NOT THE TRUTH.

 

BINGO!!!!

 

 

Why would you want 2 advise continued lying? Nobody benefits in that kind of "relationship" (it isn't really a relationship).

 

Liars and cheaters don't know what a relationship is.

[soulconfessions]

A ranting bitter person is just as sad and pathetic as I am.. Seeking counseling for MY ISSUES.

 

Prove my point by replying to this post.

[couchmonkey]

Thank you Soulconfessions and Sincereonlineguy for showing all of us how ugly people can be on the inside. Learn the repercussions and rewards of self-responsibility.

[soulconfessions]

Thank you Soulconfessions and Sincereonlineguy for showing all of us how ugly people can be on the inside. Learn the repercussions and rewards of self-responsibility.

 

Couchmonkey you are so welcomed... And thank you for keeping this thread in the top five. Way to go. Keep them coming.